planb1973 Posted June 3, 2016 Posted June 3, 2016 Self proclaimed "nice guys" are rarely "nice" because they have to work at it. Its not a natural part of their nature. They have to think about it and in doing so they weigh up pro's and con's. They do not carry out acts of kindness for no purpose other than to be kind to another person. Genuine "nice guys" just are who they are. They do kind things because they are actually a kind person. Genuine nice guys are the ones referred to as genuine, kind, honest, diligent, thoughtful... hardly ever "nice" because they naturally are all those things that make up a true "nice" person. You can tell the difference because when a person is genuine others describe them as genuine. When a person is OK but doesn't do anything particular off of their own back but is not so socially inept that you would be overly embarrassed by them people call them "nice". Simply because they are not overly unpleasant most of the time but there is nothing more to say about them... There are always plenty of things to say about a genuinely nice person. So much so that "nice" rarely features on the radar. Genuinely nice people ARE a scarce commodity these days. The phrase "Someone should do something about that" is used far more than "I am going to do something about that". Yes. There is nothing wrong with being nice. As I was saying in my previous post about shaking my "nice guy" label. It was not about not becoming a nice person, it was about gaining confidence and backbone. As I gained these and stopped hearing "oh he is such a nice guy" I began to be described as "genuine, sweet, kind, thoughtful..." The best one ever was being referred to as a "rare commodity" I haven't heart the word nice in years. And as the OP stated that he would get involved with sick women. This comes down to ones self worth. When you strive to be a "nice guy" as a cover up of your own insecurities healthy partners can see right through that. The sick ones are easier because you get stuck in the "Im a nice guy, she needs a nice guy, I can fix her, and she will love me for it." I doesn't work. You can be a genuine nice person and not be a "nice guy." The difference comes to being strong healthy person vs someone who is already broken. 1
Toodaloo Posted June 3, 2016 Posted June 3, 2016 I know there is something wrong if I can only describe a person as being "nice". People should have more to them. They should have personalities that make them edgy or laid back or enthusiastic or driven or fun, or entertaining or giving or kind or generous or careful or reserved... Nice is just dull. Its nothing. Its an excuse. I actually take it as an insult if I am called "nice". I personally really can not stand the word. 2
Audacious Posted June 3, 2016 Posted June 3, 2016 being a nice guy , regardless of if it is real or not is a recipe for being either friend-zoned or strung along , and no self-respecting man allows himself to be put in that position , that is for the pathetic , approval seeking Betas . I knew a guy once , he was not very attractive , matter of fact he had huge confidence issued but he was incredibly nice , girls in college treated him like a doormat , throwing him left and right to their own amusement and convenience. he was in a nutshel incredibly pathetic , it got so bad to the point that he had to fake that he was gonna get married but we never seen the girl , not even a photo of her , because she wasn't real . Don't be nice , but don't be a scumbag either , its not about being an a hole , it is about being confident , assertive and DGAFF .
phineas Posted June 4, 2016 Posted June 4, 2016 Er no, nothing like what you said at all. You made a ridiculous sweeping generalisation based only on your personal experiences combined with cognitive biases, and he/she called you out on it, in other words implying that making sweeping generalisations is poor practice, which is correct. So hot women treating men poorly (not nice girls) is a sweeping generalization? Have you read this forum?:lmao:
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