Unsur Posted May 27, 2016 Posted May 27, 2016 Hello everyone. My relationship of 9 years ended 4 months ago, I've remained in NC apart from getting my stuff back last month (it went well, no relationship talk, I wasn't upset after). I'm so much happier now, I'm in a great place in my life and I'm looking forward to the future, I've even started thinking about dating again! I don't want to get back together with him, I don't even want to be friends with him... I kinda don't feel anything towards him or at least I'm nearly at that stage. The only problem is I still think about him. Every. Single. Day. Sometimes it gets to 9pm and I'll think "Oh! I haven't thought about him, yay" and then continue to think about him. Its not really in a longing way, its more in a "I wonder what hes doing" way or thinking about what I ever saw in him or I'll see something and be reminded that we used to like that/do that together. I guess its just old associations that I can't get rid of. I'm just a bit sick of thinking about him now, I want to forget him, I want to truly move on. Is this something that will eventually fade? I know we were together a long time so maybe it will take a while to forget? I dunno. I figured I'd post on here because last time it helped me so much just to vent! 1
gimlynick Posted May 27, 2016 Posted May 27, 2016 After a 9 year long relationship I kinda guess that you will remember and think of that person for the rest of your life. It's still very recent, so it's normal that it is daily now, but I guess that with time the daily reminders will change in weekly, later it will become once in a month and maybe in 15 years you will think like once or twice in a year about how he is doing. If you feel fine it's not a big deal to think about how someone is doing. Some part of him will be forever with you and vice versa. 1
Satu Posted May 27, 2016 Posted May 27, 2016 Yes, it will fade, and it will fade faster if you don't resist the thoughts If you resist them you'll just lock them in place. What you resist persists. Take care. 1
gaig Posted May 27, 2016 Posted May 27, 2016 I kinda don't feel anything towards him or at least I'm nearly at that stage. Do you love him? Why you broke up?
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