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The Moment You Realize You Are Over Your Ex

DeeplyMissHer

By DeeplyMissHer
in Breaks and Breaking Up

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DeeplyMissHer Established Member

DeeplyMissHer

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My ex girlfriend and I started dating in 2002. She was 14 and I was 16. Our daughter was born in 2008. She dumped me in 2011.

 

She had gotten involved with another man, was engaged and they broke up recently. I had one previous relationship after dating her, and now currently in a relationship with a great woman.

 

The thing was, I wasn't over my ex for the longest time. I beat myself up for going out and partying every weekend when my daughter was young. I wasn't ready to settle down. I do believe her dumping me was the best thing that could have happened.

 

Today I'm a very involved father, I have a good job and am in a great relationship with someone I can see myself being married to. Sure we are only 6 months into our relationship but I love her.

 

Anyway, last night my ex girlfriend Facebook Messaged Me:

 

"I know you're happy with "insert girlfriend name here". I get it, but I have been thinking about you a lot. We had our reasons for our break up. But I'm not going to lie. You're on my mind a lot and you are an incredible father. I know I turned you done when you wanted to get back together before. I regret saying not. Please tell me each time you look at "insert girlfriends name" you don't wish it was me? We had something special and we can have it again if you are willing to try. "

 

I sat there for a moment. Six months ago I would have without a doubt took her up on her offer but at that moment I realized I didn't want to be with her. That I was over her. I responded to her.

 

"I don't know how to say this gently. I don't want to get back together. I care about you as "our daughter name" mother but I don't have any desire for us to be in a relationship again. I hope we can continue to co-parent "our daughter name" with no issues. I think it's in her best interest if we are civil and friendly. But I feel like too much time had past and I'm in a healthy relationship. I'd appreciate it if you accept that we aren't together and that we put "daughter's name" first. Thanks."

 

I thought by this morning I'd regret it but I don't. I actually feel relieved that I finally let go of all guilt and lingering feelings for her. It's refreshing. She did respond back saying. "I guess this is goodbye."

Edited by DeeplyMissHer
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