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Posted

hello guys.

has anyone here been in a really long relationship 6+years and broke up.

dumpee and dumpers, i would love to hear your story and how you dealt with/after the breakup.

 

thanks for reading/responding.

 

1love:love:

Posted

35, female here. A couple stories:

 

1) Were together for 5 years (I realize not the 6+ you had asked, but I'll share anyway!) Lived together for 2. We were young and grew apart. I broke up with him when I realized I truly wasn't in love anymore and didn't see a future together. He admittedly was quite hurt and tried to reconcile but I couldn't. That was 12 years ago now. We are not in direct contact anymore, but I do know he is now married and has a baby.

 

2) Following the above relationship, I met a man with whom I stayed for nearly 8 years. We lived together for 6.5. Slowly grew apart, he became very distant and seemingly indifferent. Consequently, I started to lose interest too. We parted relatively amicably as we could both see the relationship had run its course, but I found out later he'd been having an affair with a coworker for a couple months before we split. He is now married to her, and they also have a child. As above, we are not in direct contact and haven't been since we broke up 4 years ago.

 

Both of the above relationships had their good times and bad. I have happily moved on from both and have a wonderful partner now. I am much happier with who I am as a person, which in turns makes my relationship satisfying. I learned a lot from those two relationships, so I know what I need and desire from a partner.

Posted

I'm 56 and my ex girlfriend is 61. She dumped me "amicably" about 3 years ago after 10 years of relationship.

 

I reckon that at this stage of our lives dealing with a breakup is different than for younger people for many reasons. A year after the b/u I met my current girlfriend with whom I'm very happy with, although I often think of my ex. On the other hand, I know she's still alone but have no idea what's she's going through. I wish her well, though.

Posted

I was with an EX for almost 12 years. We lived together for 10. I spent most of it hoping he'd change his mind that marriage was "just a piece of paper" and that there was nothing wrong with our relationship as it was. Eventually I came to realize he'd never marry me & I got the courage to end things. I actually moved out a little more than a year before we ended.

 

 

I cried a lot. I kept myself busy. I had a rebound relationship.

Posted (edited)

I had a 9-year relationship that ended five years ago. It was wonderful for quite a long time, then it lost a bit of thrust, particularly on the sexual department. We got married 7 years into the relationship. Then we tried to have kids, but it wouldn't happen. One month before the breakup, she started a treatment because she had some problems to get pregnant. She changed completely since then. One day I started getting too suspicious, checked her e-mail (I know, wrong) and I discovered she had cheated on me, at least emotionally, one week before. We broke up immediately. I never begged or tried to have her back and, apparently, she hates me for that.

 

One week later she had withdrawn the money from our bank account, taken my laptop, two TV sets and god knows what else. Her father is rich. It's not like she's in need nor ever will. It didn't take a genius to know that I had been sleeping with my enemy for 9 years. Turns out she's a compulsive liar and has some serious mental issues. I never detected them. Those around us didn't notice anything, either, even people who knew her since childhood. My parents, who loved her madly, are still waiting for an official goodbye from her. She completely ignored them.

 

She treated me like garbage while we tried to sort out what we did with our 420,000€ flat. She wanted me out, even though I had paid more than her. Nice. At this point I was a mixture of devastation, hysteria and extreme anger, but I never fought back. Just claimed what was mine. Then a friend of hers took pity on me and told me the truth: she had not cheated once, but twice. The second guy was a co-worker with whom she had a relationship almost from day 1 after our breakup. That disclosure came four months after the breakup and it was definitely my lowest point. Then, she and her new friend went to Thailand. I'm pretty sure I unknowingly paid for that trip.

 

I could go on and on forever (fake suicide attempt to make me feel guilty -of her cheating on me?–, a motorcycle and a kayak I never got back, lying about me everywhere, me almost giving away the flat to fend off her madness, etc, etc, etc). The last time I saw her was two years later, when we signed our divorce. I didn't feel anything. I looked at her and didn't even know who she was anymore. I'm told by people who are close to her that she still stalks me on social media and knows every single bit of information about my life. I don't know if she's alive as I write this. I've never seen her again. Fortunately.

 

I've been through two more breakups since then. I sometimes wonder why I still believe in love. But I do.

Edited by keiji
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Posted

thank you everyone for sharing your stories.

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