She parents wouldn't approve of me being black. so we broke up

[shadowproto]

I'm sorry...I'm new to all this, and I hope there's someone out there that can understand what I'm going through

I met this girl. She's Cuban and she's from Florida and she's an amazing woman. before we started dating we talked almost everyday. Soon we later started dating and we helped each other through our worse times. and we really cared for each other. we dated for 2 years and our love was still as strong as we first met. I finally got a job so I could see her. But every time I try to make plans to see her she make excuse after excuse. and I wanted to know why she didn't want to see me, so she finally admitted that her parents couldn't find out that she's dating a black guy. And she doesn't see us having a future together, but we can try to make things work. We talked about it and we continue to date for a few months, day after day I felt her getting colder and distancing herself more and more. So I asked does she still love me anymore. She says she still cares about me (I know she doesn't love me anymore, I don't why people can't just tell me)and she would still like to be my friend...too be honest I hate that. I hate that I waste 2 years of my life knowing that I couldnt be with a girl I loved so much. I hate the fact that I had to be kept a secret because of my race. and I hate the fact that I'm just born black. This is coming from multiple breakups , yeah I know that someone will come around in my life. But I hate the fact that we broke up over something like that. I always hated myself and have multiple insecurities. but now I hate myself even more for just being born. and now I can't even look at myself in the mirror without seeing an ugly person that basically every race look down on...haha..I'm talking too much...I do hope she's happy and find someone. But...I really dont care what happen to me...I hate myself so much for having hope.

[fixing]

WOW. Sorry to hear that man! But, seriously? WTF!? She doesnt want her parents to know that you are black? **** HER MAN!

 

She is worthless. I know it's very painful man right now, but, you got to cut ALL contact. Block all social media, don't spy on her pages or ask about her.

 

HOW DARE SHE TREAT YOU LIKE THAT!

 

And don't be saying things like 'I wish I wasn't born'. Love yourself man. Seriously.

 

And, btw, if you feel that low and have that many insecurities I suggest you talk to a therapist. It could really help you.

 

You did the right thing coming to this site though. It's a great support network.

 

Stay strong man and realise that that woman is a spineless, superficial waste of skin on the inside. Extremely shallow and I know, just by your writing that you are a great guy who deserves much better in life.

[spiderowl]

I'm really sorry about how this girl behaved. She is too influenced by her parents, though parents' attitudes can be difficult to deal with.

 

You met someone who is not able to resist her parents' conditioning, but actually probably just didn't fall in love with you long term. It happens. People do fall out of love and it has nothing to do with race or colour. There are loads of people on here who are sad because a relationship broke up.

 

I guess what I am saying is that although this girl's family was prejudiced, it doesn't mean that most people are or that you are anything less than a wonderfully, lovable black guy. Black guys are amazing, so are white guys! You are hurt because the girl you liked didn't want to keep the relationship, you are bound to feel hurt and demoralised. Everyone does in that position. Turn your attention to the people who are not prejudiced, who are open to relationships. Forget about those who are not mature enough. Believe me, there will be wonderful girls out there who will be proud to show you off and call you their own. Don't let this one let-down affect your view of yourself. It really is not you, it is her!

Edited May 22, 2016 by spiderowl

[Cherryz]

Dude be happy you dont have to deal with racist stupid people for one more year!

 

How are they racist if most cubans are black! And born around black people?!!!!

 

I think not just her parents but she also racist!

But lie about parents. Maybe she liked you but was more interested in racism.

 

Because there some people that have parents that are racist.

But still they would say or do things like: keep meeting in secret, rebel against their parents and move out with you,do it anyway and let their parents meet you, and if they dont act right just move away from them, and so on.

 

But this girl, just a liar and racist.And much more busy with the wrong things. I think you need to just prepare your final speech and call her up and curse her out for wasting your time with crap story's for 2 years. And then block her everywhere so she cant text you and is out of your space.lol.

 

And you should never blame your beautiful skin color because of none smart people who are not happy with themselves and try to project that on your skin color.

Look up black hero's, and you will see how much more you should be proud to have that skin color! lol

And be glad you dont have to waste more minute on this person.

There are so many amazing girls, and Latin girls out there that are not racist and that have personality.

 

And at the end you deserve a amazing girl. And she wasnt that person.

Cry 1 2 3 times, then move on. And enjoy your life.

 

How old are you btw? Good luck.

Its one bad experience, not a bad life!

[76_Pinto]

Her excuse about you being black sounds like BS! You are the same color as when you two first met, so why has it become an issue now? Personally, I think it's more likely she's using it as an excuse to breakup with you, because she met someone else, or she's ashamed of you. Either way, she's shown you her true character, and you should not spend another second of trying to figure her out. Just let this one go and work on moving on with your life.