What I wish I knew

[Maddy416]

I just recently started no contact with my ex boyfriend. He stopped calling and texting and he said its best to move on for good now. I just wanted to share my store and maybe help a few others going through the pain and confusion that goes with a breakup. We officially broke up three months ago, he broke up with me because he wanted to be single and said some days he has strong feelings for me and others he doesnt. This was all said to me via text, he stated he still wanted me in his life and did not want to cut off contact. I ignored every message and every call. Then it went from not wanting to split with me to lets hang out and see if we could try again. This is where I failed. Because I cared about him, I believed every word he said and started to see him again with out any titles. He said he wanted to work back up to that. He called me babe, took me out and brought me around his friends and family again, even flew me to Florida to be his date to a wedding. He initiated every conversation and wanted me to hangout everyday. The rare times I brought up what was going on and where we stood, he'd get angry and told me I was pushing him. He would then back off just to come back and say he missed me and needed me in his life, and that he doesn't want us seeing others he only wants me. This went on for about two months, and then he started acting strange. He didn't call as much and barely asked me to hangout for about a week. Finally we talked in person and he told me he wants me to date others, and that he can't give me all the things I deserve and its best to end it for good. He said it wasn't working for him anymore. Just like that he cut me out, he told me all the ways he acted toward me was just to be friendly and that he doesn't see himself dating me. It was very hurtful because one minute he was all about me and the next gone. The point of this story is for anyone who has an ex trying to give them crumbs or claiming they need them in there life is probably doing it for their own selfish reasons, not saying all do but most. I don't know what happened or if he found someone else, but if anyone can go from hot to cold like that they most likely don't truly care about you and have no respect for your feelings. I know its hard to keep ignoring the person who broke your heart right after being dumped but I wish I did. During that time I was so proud of myself and felt so strong. This was the first breakup that I didn't beg or cry or react. I just told him I respect his choice and then ignored him, but like I said that's when he starting begging me to talk to him. If I would have kept it at that and walked away with my head held high feeling powerful and proud of myself I would have been ten times better today. By allowing him to use me for his own ego boost, it feels like I got dumped all over again but much more painful. No matter how much I thought all the things we did together after our breakup meant something and they did mean a lot to me, he was able to do all that while thinking it was just for fun. Stay strong and just know someone will come along and give you all the things you deserve, love shouldn't be this hard and love is always knowing you want that person in your life, not just for when it beneficial.

[Blossomingbelle]

I am in the exact same position at the moment! However my ex started having an affair with someone 2 days after we split, when her boyfriend found out he came back to me. Now they have made up again and he drops me! It hurts but I suppose we'll be better off without them in the long run!