Jono85 Posted May 19, 2016 Posted May 19, 2016 (edited) Background: Met girl this last Saturday at party. It was a friend's party, but she didn't seem taken by anyone so I proceeded. We hit it off really well, great chemistry, physically and conversationally. She did keep telling me she had "complications" which she refused to tell me what they were (I know, red flag). We were both drinking, but neither seemed drunk. Anyway things got intimate with us outside, made out a couple times. BUT, during/after 2nd round she stops and says basically that she was talking to another guy here, who expressed interest in her, but she is not too long removed from relationship and said to him she was enjoying being single, BUT she would hate for him to come outside and see us. This guy happens to be an old friend from high school, but we do not talk/hang anymore, not for over a decade. Anyway, me figuring all is well to proceed in following days b/c the way she told things to me, it sounded more like she just didn't want him hurt/seeing us. After exchanging a couple texts the following morning, I asked her how she was feeling and whether she recalled meeting the man of her dreams the night prior (okay, maybe semi corny, but previous night I had very cocky/confident demeanor which she was very receptive to). I get nothing. 6 hrs or so later I text "tough crowd". Still nothing. Finally at 2am (weird how late..) she apologizes and says she didn't know what to say to that, and the fact is I (me, not her) know there's something there with this friend which she doesn't know how will play out, and it wouldn't be right on either of us to hang out. Next morning I say I honestly don't know anything, we don't hang out (me and old friend), all I know is what you told me, and how he's interested but you're enjoying single life but maybe I misinterpreted things. She confirms that's true, but doesn't mean she should spend her time with his friend. At this point it doesn't matter how illogical this all sounds since the bottom line is I'm getting resistance, so I play it cool/nice and say that's understandable, and I'll respect that and back off, and that I had a great time regardless. And she never texted back, that was on Monday. I get that there was no absolute need to text back but still seemed kind of strange/cold. My Thoughts: I feel I played this right by backing off when met with resistance. What sucks is, for me, I can count on one hand in my 30 years how many times I had that much chemistry with someone off the hop, physically and conversationally, interests, etc. It doesn't sit well with me to just let it go and not even with much fight, given she is indeed single. But for me, if she didn't feel that same connection, which her actions are telling me, then why not let it go. I just know how stubborn I am and if she comes back to me in few weeks or something I'm not going to be interested, the vibes are long gone. I guess the only thing that makes me question things is bc her texts make it seem more of a moral reason we can't hang out, and her lack of response when I said I'd back off, almost made me feel she was being cold bc she didn't want me to just back off lmao. Probably stupid to think that tho. Anyway would appreciate anyone's thoughts... my logic side/brain applaudes my decision to just back off even when my heart says there were fireworks Saturday and doesn't understand why I didn't try harder to see her again. Edit: Yes, I do realize how sad/pathetic it seems to write that essay based on a girl I met/knew for one evening. hah sigh Edited May 19, 2016 by Jono85
smackie9 Posted May 19, 2016 Posted May 19, 2016 Typical party stuff....girl wants attention, she gets loosey goosy on alcohol, looks for a guy that would be easily receptive, get him all revved up pawing all over her, she gets an ego boost, feelin real good, then after the party she is done with the guy, had her fun, her flirt, her ego boost....toss him aside, will find some other shlep repeats process. That what they call a c*&% tease. You got bamboozled.
Author Jono85 Posted May 19, 2016 Author Posted May 19, 2016 Typical party stuff....girl wants attention, she gets loosey goosy on alcohol, looks for a guy that would be easily receptive, get him all revved up pawing all over her, she gets an ego boost, feelin real good, then after the party she is done with the guy, had her fun, her flirt, her ego boost....toss him aside, will find some other shlep repeats process. That what they call a c*&% tease. You got bamboozled. Yes, rationally and logically speaking this definitely makes the most sense. I guess the only defense against this is to either not attempt to meet girls at parties, or at least not expect anything from them. If I could press the rewind button I would have just not texted her Sunday and least left her in a marginally worse egotistical state, sigh. Thanks for your input.
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