TimmyC Posted May 17, 2016 Posted May 17, 2016 (edited) It's been two months and I want to just tell her how much I hate her, I'm tempted to message her and let her know how she made me feel. The damage she has caused.... And on other days I miss her and think about how happy she is with someone else. How do I stop loving her like she has with me. There HAS to be something I can do to make myself stop loving her. I'm going crazy thinking about her. I don't want to be on this Rollercoaster anymore. I even sabotaged a potential friendship with a girl I met on okcupid,because I couldn't stop thinking about my ex. I ended up distancing myself. Edited May 17, 2016 by TimmyC 2
sorano Posted May 17, 2016 Posted May 17, 2016 There is nothing you can do. Nothing. Everything comes in stages. There will be a point where you will experience hate, anger, and love at the same time. Just like you said, a roller coaster. Up and down. Just when you think you have it all under control, one day you will get that anger and it starts all over again. You will then feel sad again. Its going to take a long time. But trust me, out of nowhere, you will start to feel your chest get lighter and you will start to smile again. Im in that phase where I get angry at times but then I start to feel really good and its lasting. I am not fully relapsing to where I start to cry again. Once this happens, you will notice the roller coaster ride is over. It will be just a steady state of either happiness or anger. The happiness side will prevail and trust me, it will be and get better. It takes time my man. Let time do its thing. 2 months is still fresh. ride it out and don't contact or look her up. Keep in mind, nothing lasts. pain, suffering, sickness, heart breaks, you name it, will not last. It will all dissipate. I repeat that to myself everyday. Nothing lasts forever and it will be ok. ITS OK! Its all good and its ok. repeat that and trust me it will help. so on top of me telling myself its GOING TO BE OK, its all good, its ok!!!, nothing lasts forever, any pain and suffering will end, I also improved myself. From getting a new job, to revamping my clothing. I even tell myself I will not let her beat me and make me live a miserable life. No. enough is enough and its my turn. I will make myself better. Plus starting my body building journey again is helping me out. Remember, its ok. Its ok. 3
Author TimmyC Posted May 19, 2016 Author Posted May 19, 2016 Your right man, thank you. I guess sometimes I get frustrated because there was so much to say during the breakup that I never got to say how she made me feel. Its almost as if I'm lacking that closure. I ended up blocking her once again so I wasn't tempted to message her. And I may just post in the NC thread just so I can feel some closure. Thanks again for your help man. It really helps knowing I can vent and know someone is willing to listen, It feels less alone. 1
sorano Posted May 19, 2016 Posted May 19, 2016 anytime my friend. The same thing happened to me. There is so much I had to say to my ex. so much. I never got a chance to. The lack of closure is also there. The problem is, when you get dumped, hurt, its hard to say what is on your mind right there and then. Once you start to calm down and start to play over what happened, you can then say what you want to. sometimes, we dont ever get that chance because they just block us out. That is what happened to me. Also, Im sure you can relate to this as well. There are times where I just want to repeat what she told me and to show her how messed up it was or how wrong it was. Just want to sit her down and tell her, is this normal to do and say? was that nice? You know what Im sayin? I get so angry when I think about what I want to tell her. lets hope WE can get through this. I know we can. 3
Satu Posted May 19, 2016 Posted May 19, 2016 It's been two months and *I want to just tell her how much I hate her, I'm tempted to message her and let her know how she made me feel. The damage she has caused.... And on other days I miss her and think about how happy she is with someone else. **How do I stop loving her like she has with me. There HAS to be something I can do to make myself stop loving her. I'm going crazy thinking about her. I don't want to be on this Rollercoaster anymore. I even sabotaged a potential friendship with a girl I met on okcupid,because I couldn't stop thinking about my ex. I ended up distancing myself. *Hate is pathology. Hate is disease. **It's not love. It's a dysfunctional attachment. > Find out what love really is. Take care. 2
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