dannyglow Posted May 17, 2016 Posted May 17, 2016 (edited) Ok, so here's whats up. Been dating her for almost 4 months now. Were getting to know each other really well. She's told me about her bad past relationships, guys cheating on her, and her with guys for one night stands. Anyway, so she's deleted a bunch of guys off her phone and facebook that she says were in this category. Basically, the guys she never was "friends" with. Its about things she's said and things Ive noticed.. maybe nothing: ~For the past 2 weeks, we haven't had sex. We were having it twice a week before. I'm not all about sex, its just making me think. ~A week ago she tells me she missed a few pregnancy pills so we cant have sex for a month while she doubles up and hormones level out etc. That might be right.. but I thought it was more like a week. ~Tonight she was joking about having sex using mdma (she used to use) which I know makes you want sex and feel loved by random people who might not even love you etc. So now that's bringing up thoughts of random guys she knew for flings. ~Once before I was paranoid she was fooling around, so she said she would send a pic of something to let me know she was home. She did, fine. Her dad is really strict about her being home on time. 11pm on weeknights. Tonight she leaves my place to be home at 10, and sends me a picture of herself on her bed in the same cloths she was in today etc.. but without me asking her to send me a picture. And she sends it exactly at 11pm. She says "fell asleep as soon as I hit the pillow lol" but she didn't seem tired when she left my place. Not like that. Now the thoughts of "she got a quickie from on of her old "friend with benefit" guys along her 10 minute drive home" ~Worse, she has no problem telling her dad she's somewhere she is not. She says "if he doesn't know it wont hurt him" Now Im just paranoid. Maybe sex with me isn't great. She says it is, and shes not a sex addict etc. But I see these things as flags. What do you guys think? What should I ask her? How do I know if shes lying? I get these feelings every once in a while. Edited May 17, 2016 by dannyglow
Blanco Posted May 17, 2016 Posted May 17, 2016 If your goal is to eventually drive her away with your senseless jealousy and insecurities, then keep on with this nonsense. You've started multiple threads about this topic relating to this girl. The issue here is you, not her. It's like you're looking for any shred of evidence to prove that she's being unfaithful; as though starting new threads about the same subject will finally get people to indulge your baseless theories. Stop. You probably don't mean to be, but you're exhibiting some early signs of the controlling boyfriend. Her needing to provide proof of her whereabouts? Seriously? Most girls would rightfully be offended by such a request. You're treating her like she's already guilty, and that's a degree of smothering any self-respecting girl is going to say, "Adios" to sooner than later.
Author dannyglow Posted May 17, 2016 Author Posted May 17, 2016 If your goal is to eventually drive her away with your senseless jealousy and insecurities, then keep on with this nonsense. You've started multiple threads about this topic relating to this girl. The issue here is you, not her. It's like you're looking for any shred of evidence to prove that she's being unfaithful; as though starting new threads about the same subject will finally get people to indulge your baseless theories. Stop. You probably don't mean to be, but you're exhibiting some early signs of the controlling boyfriend. Her needing to provide proof of her whereabouts? Seriously? Most girls would rightfully be offended by such a request. You're treating her like she's already guilty, and that's a degree of smothering any self-respecting girl is going to say, "Adios" to sooner than later. You're right, I dont mean to be. I really hate myself for being like this. I'm just having paranoid thoughts. This was a girl with a background of quick senseless flings with random guys from bars. She isn't honest with the man who raised her from a baby, so I'm wondering why a guy she has known for 4 months should be any different. Yeah I have trust issues. A lot of my friends have been in relationships where they were cheated on and it scares me. I feel like Im better to her than any other guy has ever been, but not good enough sexually for her. I hate myself for having all these thoughts. I haven't talked to her at all about anything, so its not like Ive driven her away at all. This is in my head, I just want to know if there is any sort of question or discussion I could bring up that will answer questions without driving her away. If not, I will just let things rattle around in my mind until they go away
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