[update] She is so so angry with me, and says she dosent trust me. I want her back.

[kendahke]

I have to respect her at the minute.

 

See, this here is the crux of all of your problems. Re-read what you said here. To you, this is some temporary thing--"oh, she's just being crazy.. she'll get over it. I expect her to get over it". You are still dismissing the damage done to her because it's inconvenient to you.

 

No. You have to respect her PERIOD. You don't. 4 pages of your posts makes that abundantly clear. It's all "yeah you're right, but me me me" Nothing in there about her and her pain and the pain you're causing her with "me me me". Your response is going to laden with "me me me".

 

I know there is still love there, I was open to her over the phone admitted to everything even things that weren't lies and she said they where so I admitted to them (the truth). I've just hope with time we can chat face to face.

 

You know what? You can have love for someone and still know deep down in your heart that they do not mean you any emotional good. Had this been just once, yeah, perhaps a pseudo-mistake. But 3 times? AND you never took full, mature, adult responsibility for it until she made it clear that you were dismissed? To her, this is all about you being inconvenienced because if you truly had love for her, the thought to pick up your phone and text your ex would have been strangled in its crib because you'd have known that her esteem was far more precious to you than whatever it was that told you it was OK to do this. 3 times.

[Rossacelt]

I know man I've caused her pain, I have to stay away period.