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Friend Is Worried The Coworker She Is Going After Is TOO Close to His Ex-Wife

aramblingronin

By aramblingronin
in General Relationship Discussion

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aramblingronin New Member

aramblingronin

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First off, I know what the general opinion about dating in the workplace and it is not good. I work at the same workplace as the two people concerned.

 

 

Lana is a 45 year old female who has never been married and does not have kids. Ted is a 50 year old male, married once and divorced almost two years ago. He has a 25 year-old son in medical school about 2 hours away. His wife lives in the same metropolitan area.

 

I know not all divorces have to end in bitter feelings and ex-spouses may still remain friends.

 

 

  • He almost never refers to her as his "ex-wife". It is almost always wife or "my wife, when we were married".
  • He is still quite friendly with his former in-laws. His sister-in-law actually borrowed his vehicle when she was visiting from California this past winter.
  • He is very helpful towards his ex-wife.

 

  1. He did his ex-wife's income taxes this year for her. He does not have a financial background and he has mentioned his divorce was money related regarding his side of the family.
  2. His ex-wife is currently enrolled in an online-degree program. However, it turns out he is actually doing the 100% of the coursework for his ex-wife. She gets the degree from him doing the coursework.

 

 

Why am I dragged into this? Well, I know Lana from work and we know some of the same social circle outside of work because we're from the same ethnic and religious group. And I'm typically very good at playing devil's advocate, but I'm having a hard time of doing so in this case.

preraph Established Member

preraph

Posted
Posted

Well because it is work, I'd stay out of it and let her make her own mistakes. It does sound like he is still very chummy with the ex and family. However, maybe your friend is a very secure type who isn't worried about it. If not, she should know better.

minimariah Established Member

minimariah

Posted
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[*]He almost never refers to her as his "ex-wife". It is almost always wife or "my wife, when we were married".

 

huuuuuge red flag.

 

if Lana feels like this man isn't over his ex - she's probably right, she should listen to her instincts & bow out.

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