mmx Posted May 13, 2016 Posted May 13, 2016 So this weekend I am staying with a guy (we both like each other) and I have three huge pimples on my face. I am self-conscious about it. I almost don't want to go because of it. I feel disgusting and ugly. Even with makeup they are noticeable. Is this a turnoff? What do I do about it?
selinaluv Posted May 13, 2016 Posted May 13, 2016 Have you met each other before? If so, he obviously likes you and is attracted to you if you are spending the weekend together. A mature man will see who for who you are beyond three temporary pimples that will disappear in a couple days. On top of that, these blemishes always seem worse to us than anyone else. 3
d0nnivain Posted May 13, 2016 Posted May 13, 2016 Everybody has imperfections. Yours are slight & temporary even though they feel glaring to you. If you continue to act confidently only the most shallow person would be the slightest bit put off my a pimple. Try to relax 1
basil67 Posted May 13, 2016 Posted May 13, 2016 Turn the tables: if this guy had three pimples, would it change the way you feel about him? 1
Porter56 Posted May 13, 2016 Posted May 13, 2016 He likes you right? Well like it was said...act confident. Make lots of eye contact and smile a lot. Seriously when a woman I like smiles at me. I'm oblivious to everything else. He likes you and you like him. Get lost in that feeling when you are with him and you'll forget all about it.
Erik30 Posted May 14, 2016 Posted May 14, 2016 Don't worry, he already likes you so he won't care. Just have fun and forget about the pimples.
Buddhist Posted May 14, 2016 Posted May 14, 2016 Okay, I'll tell you a story. My previous partner was absolutely flawless when I met him. Porcelain skin, it was something about him that actually really admired amoung the other things I liked. Shortly after we got together the hormones got the better of him and he developed bad cystic acne. Something he had never had before in his life and he was almost 30 at the time. He was incredibly embarrassed etc and desperately tried everything to rid himself of it. It only got worse. Did I dump him? No. Did I love him any less? No. Did it actually matter to me in any way at all? No. I didn't even see it even though most of his face was covered in dark red angry bumps, that eventually permanently scarred his skin. It cleared up after a time, he never again had that beautiful skin. It didn't matter. When things finally did end between us years later I still cried myself to sleep for about 4yrs after the breakup. When someone loves you, they love you, regardless.
smackie9 Posted May 14, 2016 Posted May 14, 2016 Having acne is a fact of life...he has seen you with one or two before he knows you are just one of those who has breakouts. Everyone is right, if he really likes you, he isn't going to care. It will be better for you if you show confidence, and ignore it. Being bright, and positive will over shadow a couple of pimples.
Jabron1 Posted May 14, 2016 Posted May 14, 2016 If acne is a big issue for you, I would suggest seeing a doctor about a drug called 'accutane'. If this is just about a couple of zits, then this is just a problem of the mind. I know it's annoying when you have a date coming up, and you want to look your best. You wake up that morning and find a spot right next to your mouth or something. That's happened to me a bunch of times . I sympathise that it is very irritating, but it's really not the end of the world. Look at it like this: if their interest in you is so flimsy that a little spot causes such grief, then good riddance. Things never go down like that anyway in my experience. It's only a real problem if you let it effect your confidence.
katiegrl Posted May 14, 2016 Posted May 14, 2016 OP have you tried Proactive? People swear by it. I have used it myself and also use the very fast healing zit buster! Heals those nasty zits that suddenly pop up literally overnight! That said, when on a date or spending weekend the last thing you want to be is self-conscious .... no matter how silly the reason may be to others. He probably won't care about the zits, but that's not the point. It is about how YOU are feeling and wanting to feel the best you can! So if you are feeling *that* self-conscious, consider cancelling but make sure you reschedule right then and there, give him alternative date and time making sure he knows you are still interested, just not feeling well. Or just go on the date, and try to forget about the zits, like everyone has been saying, he probably won't care. Good luck!
RedPurpleOrange Posted May 14, 2016 Posted May 14, 2016 Okay, I'll tell you a story. My previous partner was absolutely flawless when I met him. Porcelain skin, it was something about him that actually really admired amoung the other things I liked. Shortly after we got together the hormones got the better of him and he developed bad cystic acne. Something he had never had before in his life and he was almost 30 at the time. He was incredibly embarrassed etc and desperately tried everything to rid himself of it. It only got worse. Did I dump him? No. Did I love him any less? No. Did it actually matter to me in any way at all? No. I didn't even see it even though most of his face was covered in dark red angry bumps, that eventually permanently scarred his skin. It cleared up after a time, he never again had that beautiful skin. It didn't matter. When things finally did end between us years later I still cried myself to sleep for about 4yrs after the breakup. When someone loves you, they love you, regardless. Bloody hell, you're not my ex from several years back are you? That's what happened to me! Got with her when I was about 30/31 years old and suddenly got incredibly bad cystic acne! And she was also super-supportive through my 'Toxic Avenger period'...and said she was still suffering years after we broke up...spooky! Accutane cleared it up. Horrible drug but boy does it work. But for three pimples, I'd stick to something safe like benzoyl peroxide. That's really cool for minor breakouts.
smackie9 Posted May 14, 2016 Posted May 14, 2016 Household tip: Before bed dab with toothpaste (not the gel type). It dries them out. 1
Lorenza Posted May 14, 2016 Posted May 14, 2016 Household tip: Before bed dab with toothpaste (not the gel type). It dries them out. No. Just no. Op don't listen to advice like this. Toothpaste has loooads of skin irritants, like sodium laureth sulfates and can make it way worse. Household tips are pretty crappy, sorry. 1
ChickiePops Posted May 14, 2016 Posted May 14, 2016 No. Just no. Op don't listen to advice like this. Toothpaste has loooads of skin irritants, like sodium laureth sulfates and can make it way worse. Household tips are pretty crappy, sorry. Tinted medicated moisturizers!
Buddhist Posted May 15, 2016 Posted May 15, 2016 Bloody hell, you're not my ex from several years back are you? That's what happened to me! Got with her when I was about 30/31 years old and suddenly got incredibly bad cystic acne! And she was also super-supportive through my 'Toxic Avenger period'...and said she was still suffering years after we broke up...spooky! Accutane cleared it up. Horrible drug but boy does it work. But for three pimples, I'd stick to something safe like benzoyl peroxide. That's really cool for minor breakouts. It turns out it was a food allergy, wheat and dairy. He didn't eat those things prior to the time. Once he cut those two things out of his diet it cleared up in 3 weeks.
RedPurpleOrange Posted May 15, 2016 Posted May 15, 2016 No, toothpaste works as a quick fix. Really does. Sodium laureth sulfate is EVERYWHERE. Shampoos are the worst culprit, even expensive ones. My skin really does not like sodium laureth sulfate, even if that compound has a quite beautiful name. Red/dry skin. But yellowheads get neutered by it. It's a complex trade-off.
blackcat777 Posted May 15, 2016 Posted May 15, 2016 (edited) From a different perspective, I'm in the beauty industry... which included professional education on "performing extractions," aka popping pimples. I'm flattered whenever my boyfriend (who has oily skin) asks for my assistance. The plus side of oily skin is that you'll age slower. Full on retinol drugs... and the resultant problems they create (clearing acne, and then causing stronger waves to come later because of the way vitamin A stimulates the skin cells to shed) can often cause more damage. They are very strong and shouldn't be prescribed lightheartedly. They come with a ton of contraindications. Dermatologists sometimes overprescribe these without taking into account proper care of an oily skintype... which is what should be addressed first, before pulling out the heavy artillery. A nice med spa might be able to acquaint you with some simple products formulated for your skin, the right kinds of exfoliants, cleansers, etc. You might just need to fine-tune your home skincare routine! Corporate/chain spas also generally offer affordable facials to kickstart some skin cleansing, which would include professional pimple popping followed by some feel-good face massage. Clays and muds are also awesome for oily skin types because they naturally draw excess oil from the skin. Pro-tip: you can also do a pre-cleanse at home... with olive oil or coconut oil. When you have acne from a buildup of oils... water won't remove the deposits away (which become pimples). You need to use... oil!! So massage the HECK out of your face with some nice oils, towel off with warm water, and then go into your cleanse routine. You can DIY your own exfoliant with lemon, sugar, and olive oil... make a nice little scrub and scrub 2-3x/week. Exfoliation is important because it will minimize a buildup of dead skin cells and oils, which is basically what acne is. The other problem with using things are TOO strong (like alcohol on acne, for example) is that it will cause your body to retaliate and produce more oil. More oil -> more acne. Edited May 15, 2016 by blackcat777 3
GemmaUK Posted May 15, 2016 Posted May 15, 2016 Pro-tip: you can also do a pre-cleanse at home... with olive oil or coconut oil. When you have acne from a buildup of oils... water won't remove the deposits away (which become pimples). You need to use... oil!! So massage the HECK out of your face with some nice oils, towel off with warm water, and then go into your cleanse routine. You can DIY your own exfoliant with lemon, sugar, and olive oil... make a nice little scrub and scrub 2-3x/week. Exfoliation is important because it will minimize a buildup of dead skin cells and oils, which is basically what acne is. The other problem with using things are TOO strong (like alcohol on acne, for example) is that it will cause your body to retaliate and produce more oil. More oil -> more acne. Absolutely agree with this! I tried all kinds o medicated this and that when I was younger, then I took the risk of using Bertolli Olive Oil (in the UK you can get a small spray bottle of it for about £2.50. I get about 3 sprays in my hand then massage it in really well (it's the best thing to get rid o water proof mascara too btw). Then I soak a muslin cloth in hot water and exfoliate with that and remove any eye make up with it too. Last step is a quick go over with a store bought cucumber face wash just to remove any excess oil. Once I started doing this out breaks just stopped.
Recommended Posts