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Posted

Hello Everybody

 

A couple years ago, I experienced a pretty lousy breakup. Just recently my new Ex and I cut ties (it's just been a couple of days).

 

For my old breakup, I utilized NC to the best of my ability and successfully got over my Ex in several months. It's been a couple years since then and now I feel absolute indifference towards them. I am confident I will love someone else just as much some day.

 

My most recent Ex and I were together for about 1.5 yrs. She was a great girl and used to shower me with love. I am sad that we had the irreconcilable differences that we did. In a couple of weeks she is moving far away for about 3 months until she returns to my area.

 

The first day of the breakup I wasnt phased by it, but I knew it just hadn't hit me yet. Now I am feeling my heart starting to ache. I am wondering this; should I give myself a day or two to absolutely wallow in it? It is right to read old letters, look at old pictures, read old texts and just totally let those gut-wrenching feelings hit me?

 

I feel that it is better to face my sadness head on now, so that it doesn't rear itself in a few weeks when I realize I was suppressing/not allowing my emotions to come out.

Posted

Everybody grieves differently There is no right or wrong.

 

 

If you want to take a short time to wallow, do it. It becomes a problem if it goes on & on and you stop functioning (going to work / school or not getting out of bed)

 

 

Bit honestly nobody will judge you if you spend one weekend in bed reading old love letters, listening to sappy music & crying.

 

 

That does have to end at some point though.

  • Like 1
Posted

its completely normal to go through all these emotions and looking at pics etc etc healing takes time ... dont stay alone too much it helps and/or call friends and talk about it ...

as the good ol' saying goes ...time heals

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Posted

Thanks guys. I think I'm not doing myself any favors in the long run by rejecting my emotions now. It's going to be a long, sad weekend, but it's for the better.

  • Like 1
Posted

Always give yourself a few days to do what YOU need to do in order to help get over it/move on. Not everyone cries or has any emotions on it, but everyone has something they do to forget about it and move on.

 

I won't lie, I cried my eyes out the day of the break up, the day after, and then randomly a few times after that for a week or so. Then it turned into depression for a while, I wouldn't go out, I just settled into a routine of wake up, go to work, go to the gym, come home, sleep, repeat. That lasted a while and still does now but I go out with friends etc now lol.

 

Depression then went to resentment, which ultimately now I think I'm at the forgiving phase. If I can't forgive and forget then I'm only going to hold myself back. That's the best advice.

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