rayray1992 Posted May 11, 2016 Share Posted May 11, 2016 Hi there everyone I met my ex around 6 months back , and it was one of those relationships that came out of the blue as neither of us was looking for a relationship at the time and we pretty much got on straight away. Now she does have a lot of stresses as she has a condition called EDS , she had a really bad relationship before me and she has family issues going on aswell, however for about 5 months we worked through these and we argued from time to time but nothing serious just normal couple stuff. But then she started to get quite like stressed and depressed as her health condition she was seeing several doctors and she had to regularly go to london to see specialist, her past experiences came up again (she was sexually assaulted in her last relationship), the family issues were getting worse and we are both at the end of our third year of uni , so of course that's a lot of stress. Well basically something had to give and it as our relationship she told me she didn't have the energy with everything pushing and pulling her to continue with us , which obviously devastated me , as future (marriage and kids) was spoken about and i feel pretty hard for her. We still had to speak as we had to cancel a few holidays and what not , and throughout the time she kept telling me shes glad we are speaking , and i kept referring to her as like hun/baby basically pet names and she asked me to stop as it is confusing her and then she told me she misses me really bad but she knows this is for the best, and i've constantly told her that ill wait till the pressure/stress is less as i feel we ended way to soon and that we have a future together and shes told me that she isn't worth the wait. so yesterday after both our dissertations were submitted I decided to just leave her a really long voicemail just basically putting my cards out on the table , it wasn't anything intense or sappy i just basically told her that this has hit me like a truck, i miss her and that we are stronger together and i understand why we broke up but i think we can do this etc etc She then spoke to me while she was waiting at the dentist and then told me she would listen to my voicemail when she got home, i didn't get a text for like 6/7 hours then and i asked if everything was okay (i know she is terrified of the dentist) and then she just said....i need some space xxx so i said okay and that im here for her when/if she needs me but what do i do now? like literally just stay away like give her the space? and what are you views on the whole break up , reckon we may get back together or? thank you Jamie Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted May 11, 2016 Share Posted May 11, 2016 It's hard to say whether or not she will want to come back, but I would suggest that you don't wait for her. My suggestion is that you give her the space she wants and go No Contact. But most of all, don't end up in a position of being there for her in all ways except for boyfriend. If she wants you as a support in her life, it should be as boyfriend or not at all. Link to post Share on other sites
Author rayray1992 Posted May 11, 2016 Author Share Posted May 11, 2016 It's hard to say whether or not she will want to come back, but I would suggest that you don't wait for her. My suggestion is that you give her the space she wants and go No Contact. But most of all, don't end up in a position of being there for her in all ways except for boyfriend. If she wants you as a support in her life, it should be as boyfriend or not at all. Okay thank you for the advice that's one of the things I am concerned about is her still using me as a rock (so to speak) but i go into friend territory which I obviously don't want that Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted May 11, 2016 Share Posted May 11, 2016 I think SHE wants you in friend territory. She stopped the bf/gf pet names, she said she was not worth the wait and she listened to your "heart on your sleeve" voicemail and was unaffected by your pleas. She then told you to give her space. I guess she is done. Sorry! Link to post Share on other sites
Scarlett.O'hara Posted May 11, 2016 Share Posted May 11, 2016 You should respect her decision and give her space. Do not contact her again. Space will give her time to reflect on everything. If she misses you and wants to get back together she will contact you. If all she wants is to have a chat and be friends, tell her you are busy and move on. For your own sake you need to keep your options open and start dating other people when you feel ready. Do not put your life on hold. Link to post Share on other sites
Author rayray1992 Posted May 11, 2016 Author Share Posted May 11, 2016 Okay thanks for all the replies So just get on with my life and 'do me' so to speak and then just hope she gets back in touch with me, if not then at least i know Link to post Share on other sites
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