Laurenjade Posted May 7, 2016 Posted May 7, 2016 Today marks 15 days since I found out you had cheated. 15 days since you threw it all back at me and told me you needed space. 15 days and I've not heard one single word from you. No apology, no closure. I thought I meant something to you, I thought after 4 years we were sorted. I thought marriage, I thought a genuinely happy marriage, not like our last ones. I believed you when you said that you would never hurt me. I believed you when you said you'd never been this happy. I believed a lot. Yet, it was all lies. I'm not as broken as I was, but the physical pain is still there. The pain of not having your name pop up on my phone to tell me that you're thinking about me. That pain is the worst. Are you even thinking about me? Did I actually mean anything to you? Are you sorry that you hurt me? Or are you carrying on as normal, not having this major pain in your chest, where your heart has shattered like glass and the rest of your body has been cut and you're bleeding. The pain is worse than when I divorced. I try to think about other things. But you're always there in the back of my mind. You'll randomly jump up and I'll remember being in your car or laughing at something random until we cried. Then my whole body breaks again. How can you go from being the centre of my world to being someone I never really knew. I love you. I hate that i do. But I do. I hate that you've broken me. I hate that I'm never going to see the inside of your house again, that I'm never going to kiss you, that I'm never going to lie in bed next to you again not talking just being so comfortable in silence in each other's arms. I'm sorry you hurt me, but most of all I'm sorry I let you.
gimlynick Posted May 7, 2016 Posted May 7, 2016 Big hug for you! Try to make positive changes in your life. Apparently he's not worth it to have in your life. I know that this really sucks, but it's his choice,... And maybe one day he'll regret this, but that day you will be happy that you've finishes with him. You don't deserve a cheater, no one does! Keep your head up high, try to enjoy life and if you have a bad moment, look back to what an ******* he became. Time will heal your wounds. Take care
sowhynot Posted May 8, 2016 Posted May 8, 2016 ... but most of all I'm sorry I let you. I'd replace 'sorry' with 'bl**dy anoyed' or 'extremely p!ssed off'. Damned if I'd let him know I was feeling sad because of his cheating (even if I was ! ) 1
Recommended Posts