RandomGuy82 Posted May 5, 2016 Posted May 5, 2016 Yeah so here's the deal: I hooked up with this amazing girl in oktober and we were together for 5 months. It was a bit rocky at first but grew into something solid and amazing after a while. She was really crazy about me and I really grew to love her too. She broke up with me in march because she felt "we were too different from eachother", something she realized after I had had a bad day and we had had a fight. We didn't fight much but apparantly she had felt wronged by me several times and was really pissed at me. We decided to continue as friends. 1 week passes and this one day I was a bit too needy and she got pissed and blocked me. I did not try contacting her and just accepted it. Even though I got so messed up I almost had to go to the psyc ward at the hospital a few times. It just killed me. You know how sometimes you don't realize what you have until it' gone? Yeah that times a billion in this case. But still I didn't contact her. Exactly 1 month after she messages me out of the blue. She said she had had a dream last night about us being friends and how much it sucked that we couldn't. I played it cool and answered pretty casually. Like 15 messages into this I just asked like hey why not be friends again? Im not in that place still, Im really not. She immediately put the guard up. I was like but obviously you wanted something when you chose to contact me again etc etc and I told her I really think she's an awesome person etc. It all ended with her saying like "we both have each others' phone numbers. We'll see what happens". I went back to no contact and thought that was the last time I'd hear from her, thinking whyyyy the F did I not play it cool at the end?! Like 4ish days pass and she messages me again. This time I did play it cool. And since then (like 3 weeks ago) she's continued messaging me like twice a week, sometimes three times a week. She's asked me about my dating and I've told her that I'm dating around. Never asked her but she said that she's sleeping with some dude. She asked me about a date and I was totally open about it and hoped to get her help with like explaining what this other girl might want etc. She several times said "ohh you're so cute" when I told her about my insecurities with this girl. I try to not ask her too much because when I'm doing the asking/talking she becomes distant. And then 2 days ago she added me on facebook again. I wrotr her a few hours later on facebook messanger and she played it super cool with like two word answers. The next morning? She starts talking again. Later that day? Same stuff. And the last thing she wrote was that I should send her an after-shot in july when I'm ripped and shredded becausw she likes abs (I'm dieting right now and did so when we were together and she knows my diet goal is set for july) Like... what does she want? Is she just toying with me? Does she miss me? Do I have a shot? And if so what should I do? At first I thought I really just wanted to be friends but... I'm starting to think she might be the love of my life. She's unlike anyone I've ever met!
frigginlost Posted May 5, 2016 Posted May 5, 2016 Yeah so here's the deal: I hooked up with this amazing girl in oktober and we were together for 5 months. It was a bit rocky at first but grew into something solid and amazing after a while. She was really crazy about me and I really grew to love her too. She broke up with me in march because she felt "we were too different from eachother", something she realized after I had had a bad day and we had had a fight. We didn't fight much but apparantly she had felt wronged by me several times and was really pissed at me. We decided to continue as friends. 1 week passes and this one day I was a bit too needy and she got pissed and blocked me. I did not try contacting her and just accepted it. Even though I got so messed up I almost had to go to the psyc ward at the hospital a few times. It just killed me. You know how sometimes you don't realize what you have until it' gone? Yeah that times a billion in this case. But still I didn't contact her. Exactly 1 month after she messages me out of the blue. She said she had had a dream last night about us being friends and how much it sucked that we couldn't. I played it cool and answered pretty casually. Like 15 messages into this I just asked like hey why not be friends again? Im not in that place still, Im really not. She immediately put the guard up. I was like but obviously you wanted something when you chose to contact me again etc etc and I told her I really think she's an awesome person etc. It all ended with her saying like "we both have each others' phone numbers. We'll see what happens". I went back to no contact and thought that was the last time I'd hear from her, thinking whyyyy the F did I not play it cool at the end?! Like 4ish days pass and she messages me again. This time I did play it cool. And since then (like 3 weeks ago) she's continued messaging me like twice a week, sometimes three times a week. She's asked me about my dating and I've told her that I'm dating around. Never asked her but she said that she's sleeping with some dude. She asked me about a date and I was totally open about it and hoped to get her help with like explaining what this other girl might want etc. She several times said "ohh you're so cute" when I told her about my insecurities with this girl. I try to not ask her too much because when I'm doing the asking/talking she becomes distant. And then 2 days ago she added me on facebook again. I wrotr her a few hours later on facebook messanger and she played it super cool with like two word answers. The next morning? She starts talking again. Later that day? Same stuff. And the last thing she wrote was that I should send her an after-shot in july when I'm ripped and shredded becausw she likes abs (I'm dieting right now and did so when we were together and she knows my diet goal is set for july) Like... what does she want? Is she just toying with me? Does she miss me? Do I have a shot? And if so what should I do? At first I thought I really just wanted to be friends but... I'm starting to think she might be the love of my life. She's unlike anyone I've ever met! To be blunt -- You're being played. She is not interested in anything more than a friendship with you. If you're cool with never being in a romantic relationship with her, knock yourself out and continue down the path you are going. If you want a romantic relationship with someone, stop talking to her and look elsewhere. (The dead giveaway to the above is the fact that she only "talks" with you when she sees you are pulling away. Don't be her toy...)
Author RandomGuy82 Posted May 5, 2016 Author Posted May 5, 2016 To be blunt -- You're being played. She is not interested in anything more than a friendship with you. If you're cool with never being in a romantic relationship with her, knock yourself out and continue down the path you are going. If you want a romantic relationship with someone, stop talking to her and look elsewhere. (The dead giveaway to the above is the fact that she only "talks" with you when she sees you are pulling away. Don't be her toy...) So basically, nothing I do is going to make it so that I end up with her again?
frigginlost Posted May 5, 2016 Posted May 5, 2016 So basically, nothing I do is going to make it so that I end up with her again? Correct. You're past the point of doing anything to make her want to be with you. Her actions right now are telling you everything. Back way off and let her miss you. Do not answer to anything without substance to it. Checking on you and talking about "what's been happening" between you two is a waste of time. She can get the same thing from another friend. If in the future something "clicks" within her, she will let you know and start making a very serious effort to have you back with her in a relationship setting. Beat her at her own game. Move forward, detach, and let her see what she is missing. You wont have to say a word...
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