Popsicle Posted May 5, 2016 Posted May 5, 2016 im not feeling any desire to do this yet, but I just need to get an idea of when everyone else does and expects this?
Gaeta Posted May 5, 2016 Posted May 5, 2016 Depends the age of the kids. Little kids up to 12/13, I'd wait 3 months, depending of the quality of our relationship, goals, seriousness of it all. Kids 13 + understand better the 'dating' scene so it's ok under 3 months, always depending on the quality of our relationship, goals, seriousness of it all. 3
Larryville Posted May 5, 2016 Posted May 5, 2016 I think it depends on the age of the kids, the relationship the kids have with the parent that does not live with the kids and I believe only if that parent is 100% sure that who they are introducing the kids too is going to have a pretty significant role (mostly meaning time) with the kids present. A PS if they are a parent what kind of parent are they, do they actively participate in their own kids’ lives. 1
Author Popsicle Posted May 5, 2016 Author Posted May 5, 2016 My kids are 16 and 19, and the 19 yo is away at college. They have never seen me with another man, but I don't anticipate they'll give me a hard time. They're good kids. I just wanted to know what's the best time and the best thing to do.
Gaeta Posted May 5, 2016 Posted May 5, 2016 My kids are 16 and 19, and the 19 yo is away at college. They have never seen me with another man, but I don't anticipate they'll give me a hard time. They're good kids. I just wanted to know what's the best time and the best thing to do. What is their opinion of you dating? At 19 my daughter was the one pushing me to make a online profile.
Author Popsicle Posted May 5, 2016 Author Posted May 5, 2016 What is their opinion of you dating? At 19 my daughter was the one pushing me to make a online profile. They're all for it, because they want me out of their hair. But they're still not used to seeing me divide my time and attention while in their presence. I also wonder when is it that BF's expect to meet your kids?
Gaeta Posted May 5, 2016 Posted May 5, 2016 They're all for it, because they want me out of their hair. But they're still not used to seeing me divide my time and attention while in their presence. I also wonder when is it that BF's expect to meet your kids? As for when the boyfriend expects to meet the kids I think it's not that important. They're your kids and you make the rules. I remember a couple of years ago I went on 2 dates with a man. On our 2nd date I had to leave at a specific time to go pick up my mom who was visiting. He insisted on coming with me and I said NOWAY. He kept insisting and I said: my mom, my rules. I was single for 10 years when I started dating again. First time I brought my ex-boyfriend visiting family and meeting my adult daughter I was afraid it would be weird. It had been SO long. The weirdness lasted a few minutes and then it felt like I had done that all the time. With my current boyfriend he met my daughter after 1 month dating but it was by accident. My daughter is 28 so it was not a big deal. I waited 3 months to introduce him to my siblings and he met my parents at 4 months dating. It's very natural now because him and I are familiar with each other. I think it may be weird when you don't feel very familiar yet with your new boyfriend. 1
Author Popsicle Posted May 5, 2016 Author Posted May 5, 2016 As for when the boyfriend expects to meet the kids I think it's not that important. They're your kids and you make the rules. I remember a couple of years ago I went on 2 dates with a man. On our 2nd date I had to leave at a specific time to go pick up my mom who was visiting. He insisted on coming with me and I said NOWAY. He kept insisting and I said: my mom, my rules. I was single for 10 years when I started dating again. First time I brought my ex-boyfriend visiting family and meeting my adult daughter I was afraid it would be weird. It had been SO long. The weirdness lasted a few minutes and then it felt like I had done that all the time. With my current boyfriend he met my daughter after 1 month dating but it was by accident. My daughter is 28 so it was not a big deal. I waited 3 months to introduce him to my siblings and he met my parents at 4 months dating. It's very natural now because him and I are familiar with each other. I think it may be weird when you don't feel very familiar yet with your new boyfriend. Thsnks Gaeta. <3
nerdlingZA Posted May 6, 2016 Posted May 6, 2016 My kids are 16 and 19, and the 19 yo is away at college. They have never seen me with another man, but I don't anticipate they'll give me a hard time. They're good kids. I just wanted to know what's the best time and the best thing to do. they're old enough, you can introduce him tomorrow if you want to! your children wont be traumatised if you end up breaking up with him and dating another guy soom after 1
nerdlingZA Posted May 6, 2016 Posted May 6, 2016 I was single for 10 years noo wayyyy I would've committed suicide 1
CarrieT Posted May 6, 2016 Posted May 6, 2016 When we were dating, my now-husband waited about three months before I met his pre-teen kids. Even eight and ten months into serious dating (they knew a proposal was in the works), if I spent the night I did so on the couch until there was an official engagement (13 months into the relationship). 1
hippychick3 Posted May 6, 2016 Posted May 6, 2016 I waited a year and a half to introduce my bf to my children. I am very protective of them and didn't want to expose them to any man who wasn't, with great probability, going to be a part of my life forever. He was the first (and hopefully last) man they have met since my divorce. I was raised by a divorced mom who introduced every single guy she dated to my brother and me. I do not agree with this and chose to handle my dating life differently. I kept my dating and parenting completely separate until the right person came along. 2
blackcat777 Posted May 6, 2016 Posted May 6, 2016 I was in high school, watching my dad date after his last wife passed... The only thing that moved me one way or the other was if I heard them fighting. I didn't want anyone to fight with my dad. 1
todreaminblue Posted May 6, 2016 Posted May 6, 2016 I introduce my kids fairly early i have a sixteen year old she is the youngest the rest are adults.....they know i only date with thoughts of a long term relationship that is leading to marriage...most of my dates have come from friendships first anyway....deb 1
Author Popsicle Posted May 6, 2016 Author Posted May 6, 2016 These responses are great! Thank you so much everyone! I think I'm just not going to worry about it and do it when it feels natural. 1
Author Popsicle Posted May 13, 2016 Author Posted May 13, 2016 Another question for those who've been in this position, please: How often did you see each other before you introduced them to your kids?
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