kitana2010 Posted May 4, 2016 Posted May 4, 2016 I posted earlier this morning about a drunk call I got from my bf of 1 month and I probably shouldnt repost, forgive me and remove if necessary but I left some stuff out.. and also wanted to ask, how should I go about this situation? Before this call, he was very excited about us. Saying he thinks hes falling for me, thinks im his soulmate. Wanted to introduce me to his family (which I said not yet too) and let me meet his son. Everything was progressively effortlessly. After dwelling on this most of the day, I'm realizing hes gone back and forth a lot (but not in a malicious way). ex: one night he said he loved me, than said its too soon for that, he cant say that. than would say he thinks he loves me, or is falling for me. he'd slip again and tell me.how badly he wants to say it, but knows its too soon. And this was a bit of a trend. Over the phone on Saturday he told me "F it. I do, I love you. Im pretty damn sure" (he was taking a break from a family get together and everyone had been drinkin. He called to just check in with me and to tell me he missed me and wished I was there). This was sat. Tuesday night he calls, a little drunk (he likes to drink on weekends.. doesnt have a problem tho it sounds bad, Tuesday was a bad day, and he told me he was going to have a few at home and call me). He talked about feeling guitly because I was giving him oral without him able to reciprocate (period). I didnt care.. but than went on to say he feels guilty every time we have sex because he feels we shouldnt be having it so much (we dont honestly.. once a week?). Said hes weird about sex, and added he doesnt want what hes feeling to be just lust.. but than made a comment about how he sees me as a friend he sleeps with. Also added we click sexually better than any other experience for him.. and he THINKS we click mentally. He asked what I thought, I said I thought we clicked mentally and he quicky said he thinks so too.... I went from being on cloud 9 thinking I found the perfect guy to battling with a very possible reality he just isnt into me that way.... How should I handle this with dignity? What should I say? I cant tell him to decide on his feelings right now, that's insane... I already sent him a text saying we need to talk tonight, that its important but I'm totally unprepared. Am I going overboard? I mean, the love thing I feel should be touched on.. Am I screwing up a good thing?
d0nnivain Posted May 4, 2016 Posted May 4, 2016 My answer hasn't changed much even with the new information. Talk to him about this when you are both sober & stop parsing every word; not everybody is a linguist. I think he really is trying to be a good guy.
Gaeta Posted May 4, 2016 Posted May 4, 2016 That is a lot of drama for a ONE month relationship. Drunk calling - guilty when you have sex - he loves you, no he doesn't, yes he does! Meh! that would be too 'weak' for me. I hate the unstable type. Save yourself the bother, you know that's not gonna last 3 months. Let me guess, he's just out of a relationship?
Author kitana2010 Posted May 4, 2016 Author Posted May 4, 2016 That is a lot of drama for a ONE month relationship. Drunk calling - guilty when you have sex - he loves you, no he doesn't, yes he does! Meh! that would be too 'weak' for me. I hate the unstable type. Save yourself the bother, you know that's not gonna last 3 months. Let me guess, he's just out of a relationship? Hes been single for 2 years. He had a few dates since, but he said they fizzled out quickly and hasnt put much effort into dating since his life revolves around work. He works 10-13hr shifts.
Gaeta Posted May 4, 2016 Posted May 4, 2016 Hes been single for 2 years. He had a few dates since, but he said they fizzled out quickly and hasnt put much effort into dating since his life revolves around work. He works 10-13hr shifts. So his life is work and drink? he comes across as very emotionally unstable. Usually these men hit you fast, and drop you fast.
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