Dating and Social Media

[sweetjess1951]

Don't get me wrong - I love Facebook and Instagram for the purpose of sharing my photos and posting light-hearted, comical updates, but when it comes to dating, I can't stand the use of social media to create jealousy and leave you with questions.

 

To sum up a recent situation - I met this guy through Tinder. We met up for drinks on a Wednesday and the conversation was great. Before the date was over, he told me that he has yet to go out with a girl that he wanted to see again, and asked me to dinner the next night. I already had plans and he was going out of town that weekend, so we planned on dinner when he got back that Sunday.

 

For a month, he was GREAT!! He lead everything. I was the one who was still a little guarded due to my past experiences with guys and relationships. He came to watch my softball game, introduced me to his friends, snapchatted me to his friends, told me he 1000% wanted more from me than sex, never pressured me into having sex, cooked me dinner, etc. He told me I could leave my make-up remover at his place since I hated sleeping with my make-up on and would randomly stay at his place. One Sunday we got brunch and went and bowled after. He was very "hands on" (not in a sexual way). After bowling, we went and saw a movie. During the movie, he looked at me and whispered "I really like you". He talked about me going home with him for a wedding and us going on a cruise together. All my friends said that they could tell he really liked me and I felt the same. I would catch him looking at me the way all girls want their guy to look at them. He had even asked me if I was still getting on Tinder. I told him I may log on every now and then, but not for the purpose of meeting anyone. He said the same and that he was only seeing me.

 

Then, everything went downhill. We both went out of town one weekend (him to visit his family and I went to visit a friend of mine I hadn't seen in a while). While visiting my friend, I was telling her about him and how we met. Because she has been married waaaaaaay before Tinder was invented, I pulled up his profile to show her how it works. That's when I saw his recent update of "I'm in town for the weekend visiting family. I live in ______". I mentioned it to him and he immediately took it down, then became very distant. We didn't speak for a few days. I assumed we were done so I messaged him telling him to let me know when he wanted to get his things that were at my house. His response was "Is this because I didn't hang out with you last night?". I said "Well, I haven't talked to you in a few days, so I assumed we were done" and he responded "I didn't think we were done. I just needed some time to clear my head".

 

But nothing really changed from there. We still hardly talked. He rarely snapchated me (he would send me snaps multiple times a day prior and like every instagram photo I posted). He never asked to hang out. I ended up calling him out on it, saying that he should have been upfront with me about what he wanted, that I'm a big girl and if he just wanted sex, he could have said that, but I felt like I had been BS'ed. His response was that he didn't just want to sleep with me and actually likes me, but after clearing his head, realized he isn't able to be in a relationship now (He got out of a 3 year relationship back in November where the girl moved up to our city to live with him). After that short text conversation, I didn't really feel like I got closure, so I invited him to a NBA game, with the intention of talking about what happened.

 

We did and basically he said that he had been tied down for 3 years and really liked me, but didn't feel like he could be in a relationship. I told him I thought he did me wrong since he lead EVERYTHING, when I was actually trying to take things slower. He made this comment about how he didn't want me to miss out on another guy because of him (trying to play the cool card) but brought up me being back on Tinder and questioning what guy was in my car last, since my passenger seat was so far back. He was super flirty with me and opened the door, held my hand, etc. but I left that night and wrote him off. I thought I made it clear that if he wanted to be single, he needed to go and do that. He mentioned friends, but to me, that is just an excuse.

 

Since then, he still sends me snapchats. When I ignore them, I get more. I post to "My Story" (never directly send to him) and he chats me, ESPECIALLY if he sees another guy in my video. He likes my Instagram photos. He likes my Facebook photos. Just when a week has gone by with nothing from him, he comes back with my snapchats and photos likes.

 

I don't understand what he's doing. My friend at work says that he is being "friends". I don't think that is the case. I send my friends snapchats all the time. Him and I aren't friends. Its almost like he wants to remind me "Hey, I'm still here. Don't forget about me". And the more I ignore, the more he reaches out through social media.

 

Its upsetting because we had such a connection that we both saw. I fully understand not being ready to date after being in a long term relationship, but don't lead someone on.

 

I should just keep ignoring, right?!

[PegNosePete]

That's when I saw his recent update of "I'm in town for the weekend visiting family. I live in ______". I mentioned it to him and he immediately took it down, then became very distant. We didn't speak for a few days. I assumed we were done so I messaged him telling him to let me know when he wanted to get his things that were at my house. His response was "Is this because I didn't hang out with you last night?". I said "Well, I haven't talked to you in a few days, so I assumed we were done" and he responded "I didn't think we were done. I just needed some time to clear my head".

I'm a bit confused by this part. You went from catching him using a dating app, to him needing to clear his head? Why didn't you have a proper conversation with him about this? He seems to have totally turned this around onto YOU. HE is the one who got busted using a dating app. Why didn't you just tell him you're done?

 

After that short text conversation, I didn't really feel like I got closure, so I invited him to a NBA game, with the intention of talking about what happened.

What on earth are you thinking?? This relationship is dead as a dodo at this point, and you're inviting him to ball games???

 

All this social media stuff is only happening because you're allowing it to happen. No, you should not just "ignore" it. You should BLOCK this loser in every way you can on every social media platform, and move on.

[kendahke]

Don't get me wrong - I love Facebook and Instagram for the purpose of sharing my photos and posting light-hearted, comical updates, but when it comes to dating, I can't stand the use of social media to create jealousy and leave you with questions.

 

To sum up a recent situation - I met this guy through Tinder. We met up for drinks on a Wednesday and the conversation was great. Before the date was over, he told me that he has yet to go out with a girl that he wanted to see again, and asked me to dinner the next night. I already had plans and he was going out of town that weekend, so we planned on dinner when he got back that Sunday.

 

For a month, he was GREAT!! He lead everything. I was the one who was still a little guarded due to my past experiences with guys and relationships. He came to watch my softball game, introduced me to his friends, snapchatted me to his friends, told me he 1000% wanted more from me than sex, never pressured me into having sex, cooked me dinner, etc. He told me I could leave my make-up remover at his place since I hated sleeping with my make-up on and would randomly stay at his place. One Sunday we got brunch and went and bowled after. He was very "hands on" (not in a sexual way). After bowling, we went and saw a movie. During the movie, he looked at me and whispered "I really like you". He talked about me going home with him for a wedding and us going on a cruise together. All my friends said that they could tell he really liked me and I felt the same. I would catch him looking at me the way all girls want their guy to look at them. He had even asked me if I was still getting on Tinder. I told him I may log on every now and then, but not for the purpose of meeting anyone. He said the same and that he was only seeing me.

 

Then, everything went downhill. We both went out of town one weekend (him to visit his family and I went to visit a friend of mine I hadn't seen in a while). While visiting my friend, I was telling her about him and how we met. Because she has been married waaaaaaay before Tinder was invented, I pulled up his profile to show her how it works. That's when I saw his recent update of "I'm in town for the weekend visiting family. I live in ______". I mentioned it to him and he immediately took it down, then became very distant. We didn't speak for a few days. I assumed we were done so I messaged him telling him to let me know when he wanted to get his things that were at my house. His response was "Is this because I didn't hang out with you last night?". I said "Well, I haven't talked to you in a few days, so I assumed we were done" and he responded "I didn't think we were done. I just needed some time to clear my head".

 

But nothing really changed from there. We still hardly talked. He rarely snapchated me (he would send me snaps multiple times a day prior and like every instagram photo I posted). He never asked to hang out. I ended up calling him out on it, saying that he should have been upfront with me about what he wanted, that I'm a big girl and if he just wanted sex, he could have said that, but I felt like I had been BS'ed. His response was that he didn't just want to sleep with me and actually likes me, but after clearing his head, realized he isn't able to be in a relationship now (He got out of a 3 year relationship back in November where the girl moved up to our city to live with him). After that short text conversation, I didn't really feel like I got closure, so I invited him to a NBA game, with the intention of talking about what happened.

 

We did and basically he said that he had been tied down for 3 years and really liked me, but didn't feel like he could be in a relationship. I told him I thought he did me wrong since he lead EVERYTHING, when I was actually trying to take things slower. He made this comment about how he didn't want me to miss out on another guy because of him (trying to play the cool card) but brought up me being back on Tinder and questioning what guy was in my car last, since my passenger seat was so far back. He was super flirty with me and opened the door, held my hand, etc. but I left that night and wrote him off. I thought I made it clear that if he wanted to be single, he needed to go and do that. He mentioned friends, but to me, that is just an excuse.

 

Since then, he still sends me snapchats. When I ignore them, I get more. I post to "My Story" (never directly send to him) and he chats me, ESPECIALLY if he sees another guy in my video. He likes my Instagram photos. He likes my Facebook photos. Just when a week has gone by with nothing from him, he comes back with my snapchats and photos likes.

 

I don't understand what he's doing. My friend at work says that he is being "friends". I don't think that is the case. I send my friends snapchats all the time. Him and I aren't friends. Its almost like he wants to remind me "Hey, I'm still here. Don't forget about me". And the more I ignore, the more he reaches out through social media.

 

Its upsetting because we had such a connection that we both saw. I fully understand not being ready to date after being in a long term relationship, but don't lead someone on.

 

I should just keep ignoring, right?!

 

You should block him. Let him show up in person if he has anything to say to you. At this point, he needs to be looking you in the eye and telling you what's up. Until then, let him continue to "clear his head".

[sweetjess1951]

I'm a bit confused by this part. You went from catching him using a dating app, to him needing to clear his head? Why didn't you have a proper conversation with him about this? He seems to have totally turned this around onto YOU. HE is the one who got busted using a dating app. Why didn't you just tell him you're done?

 

 

What on earth are you thinking?? This relationship is dead as a dodo at this point, and you're inviting him to ball games???

 

All this social media stuff is only happening because you're allowing it to happen. No, you should not just "ignore" it. You should BLOCK this loser in every way you can on every social media platform, and move on.

 

The proper conversation was had at the game. I'm sure that wasn't the BEST place to have it, but the other conversations were had through text and I felt like it wasn't clearing anything up and making it more confusing.

[hippychick3]

The moment you realized he was updating his Tinder profile a month into dating is the moment you should have ended it. He is too fresh out of his last relationship. He probably liked the familiarity of relationship like activities but was nowhere ready to be in a new one yet.

 

Block him from Snapchat and move on.

[kidm]

The proper conversation was had at the game. I'm sure that wasn't the BEST place to have it, but the other conversations were had through text and I felt like it wasn't clearing anything up and making it more confusing.

 

Well now that you've cleared things up, why haven't you moved on? this guy will mind**** you if you let him. Block him. There are so many characters like him online. If you want exclusivity and a committed relationship, never assume any sort of hangout/spending time together will lead to that unless the person verbally expresses that. There are tons of people online "not ready for a relationship", "not ready for anything serious", "just going with the flow and seeing what happens."

[sweetjess1951]

Well now that you've cleared things up, why haven't you moved on? this guy will mind**** you if you let him. Block him. There are so many characters like him online. If you want exclusivity and a committed relationship, never assume any sort of hangout/spending time together will lead to that unless the person verbally expresses that. There are tons of people online "not ready for a relationship", "not ready for anything serious", "just going with the flow and seeing what happens."

 

I have moved on. I haven't hung out with him or contacted him in any way. I've been living my life and having fun as usual.

 

Why haven't I blocked him on social media? I guess I find it silly to block people unless absolutely necessary. I don't think any of his breadcrumbs are him saying he wants a relationship, because its not what it means. To me, he is saying "Hey, remember me?". I find satisfaction in viewing the snapchats and not responding in any way, and continuing to get more and more. Haha, maybe that makes me weird

[MidwestUSA]

I have moved on. I haven't hung out with him or contacted him in any way. I've been living my life and having fun as usual.

 

Why haven't I blocked him on social media? I guess I find it silly to block people unless absolutely necessary. I don't think any of his breadcrumbs are him saying he wants a relationship, because its not what it means. To me, he is saying "Hey, remember me?". I find satisfaction in viewing the snapchats and not responding in any way, and continuing to get more and more. Haha, maybe that makes me weird

 

No, it just means you HAVEN'T moved on.

 

Why let him take up space in your head?

[kendahke]

I have moved on. I haven't hung out with him or contacted him in any way. I've been living my life and having fun as usual.

 

Why haven't I blocked him on social media? I guess I find it silly to block people unless absolutely necessary. I don't think any of his breadcrumbs are him saying he wants a relationship, because its not what it means. To me, he is saying "Hey, remember me?". I find satisfaction in viewing the snapchats and not responding in any way, and continuing to get more and more. Haha, maybe that makes me weird

 

 

this is really tragic.

 

If you had really moved on, you would be so bored with anything having to do with him by now because your life really would be so full that you didn't have time to trip on him doing silly things like snapchatting.

 

I mean, keep on telling yourself that lie--but from each subsequent post since responders told you to block him, it shows that you are quite mired in place with this guy.

[Versacehottie]

I have moved on. I haven't hung out with him or contacted him in any way. I've been living my life and having fun as usual.

 

Why haven't I blocked him on social media? I guess I find it silly to block people unless absolutely necessary. I don't think any of his breadcrumbs are him saying he wants a relationship, because its not what it means. To me, he is saying "Hey, remember me?". I find satisfaction in viewing the snapchats and not responding in any way, and continuing to get more and more. Haha, maybe that makes me weird

 

I get you! I feel it's unnecessary to block people as well. It's a tool if you can't handle managing your own emotions by their attempts at contact. It's not necessary to me unless someone was stalking me. Basically I think it says just as much to not give them further attention by blocking them.

 

To me, reading between the lines, I do believe that you are going on with your life. Just make sure that your curiousity about his contact doesn't start pulling your back in. I think that's really what the other posters are reacting to. They aren't wrong by if you are handling it, it's not wrong to have a different approach. It's not different than mine would be if that makes you feel any better. Just some people deal with things in an extreme manner and others don't. Actually if I "blocked" someone that would be an "anger" move on my part and I would be looking for a reaction or that it upset them. I don't need the block strategy as a tool. My indifference and personal strength would be far more an indicator of how I was handling it. maybe that is the case for you as well?

[sweetjess1951]

I get you! I feel it's unnecessary to block people as well. It's a tool if you can't handle managing your own emotions by their attempts at contact. It's not necessary to me unless someone was stalking me. Basically I think it says just as much to not give them further attention by blocking them.

 

To me, reading between the lines, I do believe that you are going on with your life. Just make sure that your curiousity about his contact doesn't start pulling your back in. I think that's really what the other posters are reacting to. They aren't wrong by if you are handling it, it's not wrong to have a different approach. It's not different than mine would be if that makes you feel any better. Just some people deal with things in an extreme manner and others don't. Actually if I "blocked" someone that would be an "anger" move on my part and I would be looking for a reaction or that it upset them. I don't need the block strategy as a tool. My indifference and personal strength would be far more an indicator of how I was handling it. maybe that is the case for you as well?

 

This is absolutely spot on for me and I couldn't agree more.

 

Blocking someone is an anger move for me. I've blocked one person my entire life and that was this guy who I was dating (we were dating other people as well) and he decided this other girl was a "better fit". We ran into each other a few years later and he went on about how much he missed me and made a horrible mistake, even told me that he wanted to see where things went once he ended things with her. He never did and I was so mad, I blocked him on all forms of communication.

 

Blocking, in my opinion, looks like I care enough to take the time to do it. It makes me feel better (in a sense) to just ignore their contact, especially since I know that his contact is most likely breadcrumbs to see if I take the bait.

 

Obviously I wonder what his intentions are, but its not like I sit around waiting for him to call or reach out to ask to see him. I'm extremely busy and I'm living my life and haven't stopped anything as a result of any hope I have for the 2 of us to have a relationship. He sees that in my snapchats as well.

 

I just think blocking is silly unless its someone/something causing something harmful to my life.

[Emilia]

This is absolutely spot on for me and I couldn't agree more.

 

Blocking someone is an anger move for me. I've blocked one person my entire life and that was this guy who I was dating (we were dating other people as well) and he decided this other girl was a "better fit". We ran into each other a few years later and he went on about how much he missed me and made a horrible mistake, even told me that he wanted to see where things went once he ended things with her. He never did and I was so mad, I blocked him on all forms of communication.

 

Blocking, in my opinion, looks like I care enough to take the time to do it. It makes me feel better (in a sense) to just ignore their contact, especially since I know that his contact is most likely breadcrumbs to see if I take the bait.

 

Obviously I wonder what his intentions are, but its not like I sit around waiting for him to call or reach out to ask to see him. I'm extremely busy and I'm living my life and haven't stopped anything as a result of any hope I have for the 2 of us to have a relationship. He sees that in my snapchats as well.

 

I just think blocking is silly unless its someone/something causing something harmful to my life.

I think you need to stop worrying about what other people think and just block him.

[Miss Peach]

He already gave you the answer as to why. He likes the trappings of a relationship but isn't ready for one right now. It's not uncommon for many men who do this to starting thinking of you within the 8 weeks that follow. Many use it to see if the door is still open to have a relationship on lesser terms.

[Emilia]

Or he could be a collector.

[sweetjess1951]

Or he could be a collector.

 

What's that?

[Gaeta]

Your story is another one the same of hundreds we read on here.

 

When he met you he had no intention of misleading you. No he did not just want sex. He liked you and he did everything to show you how much he liked you then something changed in him after 1 month of chasing you heavily. His feelings changed, yes it happens. It's common, it's even redundant on here.

 

That is usually the conclusion to pretty much every story on here about a man heavily pursuing a woman very fast. You dated only 1 month but did things couples will usually do together after 3-4-6 months. Next time be wary and hold your horses. Under 3 months a man can bail at any time for any reasons, heck even after 3 months they do it.

 

I am sorry this happened to you. It's Online dating unfortunately. Been there, done that, and got plenty of t-shirts. Took me almost 4 years to find someone that meant what he said, and said what he meant.

[carhill]

What's that?

He collects women. Back in my day they called it a black book. Different ladies for different purposes in different locales. Common for married guys who were on the road.

 

Overall though, if the interaction doesn't work for you, it doesn't. Figuring it, or him, out is superfluous. It's a no-go, so no go. Heh.

[clia]

He's a guy you dated for a month. Do you really want to see his snap stories (or whatever) going forward? Do you even care? Just block him or unfriend him or unfollow him or whatever. In the old days, he would've disappeared from your life immediately once you were done dating. Now suddenly you have to be "friends" with this guy forever and see his posts? Come on. In the future, don't even share your social media account info with new guys you are dating.

[dumbass2]

This is absolutely spot on for me and I couldn't agree more.

 

Blocking someone is an anger move for me. I've blocked one person my entire life and that was this guy who I was dating (we were dating other people as well) and he decided this other girl was a "better fit". We ran into each other a few years later and he went on about how much he missed me and made a horrible mistake, even told me that he wanted to see where things went once he ended things with her. He never did and I was so mad, I blocked him on all forms of communication.

 

Blocking, in my opinion, looks like I care enough to take the time to do it. It makes me feel better (in a sense) to just ignore their contact, especially since I know that his contact is most likely breadcrumbs to see if I take the bait.

 

Obviously I wonder what his intentions are, but its not like I sit around waiting for him to call or reach out to ask to see him. I'm extremely busy and I'm living my life and haven't stopped anything as a result of any hope I have for the 2 of us to have a relationship. He sees that in my snapchats as well.

 

I just think blocking is silly unless its someone/something causing something harmful to my life.

 

IMO keeping an ex romantic partner (how ever long it was) on social media serves no purpose other than keeping tabs on each other and trying to one up the other with photos and posts showing that you are doing great without them, while you're both, or at least one of you, is still hoping to get back together. It's game playing and it often send a false picture of what's truly going on in someones life. If you blocked an ex on social media so what. You shouldn't want that person seeing what you are doing and you shouldn't be watching them. You say it shows anger. Well, it doesn't sound like you are really angry (maybe upset a bit) and who gives a crap what he thinks any more. Unless you do. You block for yourself, so he can't see what the heck you are doing. It's none of his business.

[MissBee]

The moment you realized he was updating his Tinder profile a month into dating is the moment you should have ended it. He is too fresh out of his last relationship. He probably liked the familiarity of relationship like activities but was nowhere ready to be in a new one yet.

 

Block him from Snapchat and move on.

 

I agree.

 

My rule of thumb personally is that if I am dating because I want an exclusive relationship, I try to find out if that person wants that too. Someone can really like you, which I'm sure he does, but still not want a relationship. Truth be told it doesn't seem like you guys ever had that talk about wanting a relationship. You assumed it, which I get it...but I learned my lesson, don't assume. There is a lot of grey area between using you for sex and wanting a relationship. Those aren't the only options. Some people just want casual dating where they do relationship-like things and genuinely like the person so hang out, it's more than sex, but it's still not an exclusive relationship.

 

It sucks but I think going forward, before you invest too much emotionally, find out what they want: if it's not a relationship, then you decide if that works for you or not...and if you really like them and want more it's usually best to walk away if they don't want a relationship because it becomes confusing when they may do bf things and that increases your attachment to them even if they don't have any intention of it being really serious. Also, a lot of people fresh out of relationships tend to dive into relationship-like behavior with a new person as a way to forget their ex even when they aren't really ready and you don't wanna be a rebound so it's best to note those things early on and not just hang out for a month or months and months without ever having a real talk because half of dating disappointments stem from assumptions that X behavior means Y when sometimes X means P to someone else.

[mortensorchid]

I find that a lot of dating websites that are linked with other social media allow for too much information to be shared. It's best to keep a bit of distance between you and this person at first, especially in the getting to know you stages.

 

One guy I connected with on one dating website asks me questions all the time about the stuff I post on Facebook / Instagram and I find it a little odd. I never ask him about stuff that he posts. But he never asks to meet me, he just asks about the stuff I post. It will go nowhere.

[SomethingToSay]

Agree wholeheartedly with MissBee. You hear so many women worried "was he just using me for sex?". He wasnt using you at all. He just isnt interested in long term comitted relationships just now. I know so many men who date short term. And I understand it. The beginning stages are fun and exciting. So they date for a few months but if the girl starts to be difficult or express dissatisfaction -- basically handing him things that come with long term relationships -- they back out. They want the companionship and intimacy and fun and connection, but they dont want the obligation, stress, conflict etc that comes with long term. The only way to achieve this is short term dating. And yes they may even agree to be exclusive during this. But that doesnt mean in their mind the R is headed where the partner might hope

[PegNosePete]

I have moved on.

Then why are you writing 2-page posts on an internet forum asking for advice?

 

If you had really moved on, you wouldn't care.

[sweetjess1951]

Then why are you writing 2-page posts on an internet forum asking for advice?

 

If you had really moved on, you wouldn't care.

 

Everyone handles things differently. Just like moving on and no longer caring doesn't go hand in hand. I can move on with my life, with zero expectations of seeing him, speaking to him or having a relationship with him, but turning off feelings is not that easy. I'm also the type of person that likes to talk about my thoughts or feelings. When I choose to get on a public forum to talk about a situation I was involved with, or maybe ask advice as to why he felt the need to still reach out via social media, that's exactly what I'm doing.

 

Of course I still think about him. But am I sitting around waiting for him to reach out? No, I'm not at all.

[sweetjess1951]

I agree.

 

My rule of thumb personally is that if I am dating because I want an exclusive relationship, I try to find out if that person wants that too. Someone can really like you, which I'm sure he does, but still not want a relationship. Truth be told it doesn't seem like you guys ever had that talk about wanting a relationship. You assumed it, which I get it...but I learned my lesson, don't assume. There is a lot of grey area between using you for sex and wanting a relationship. Those aren't the only options. Some people just want casual dating where they do relationship-like things and genuinely like the person so hang out, it's more than sex, but it's still not an exclusive relationship.

 

It sucks but I think going forward, before you invest too much emotionally, find out what they want: if it's not a relationship, then you decide if that works for you or not...and if you really like them and want more it's usually best to walk away if they don't want a relationship because it becomes confusing when they may do bf things and that increases your attachment to them even if they don't have any intention of it being really serious. Also, a lot of people fresh out of relationships tend to dive into relationship-like behavior with a new person as a way to forget their ex even when they aren't really ready and you don't wanna be a rebound so it's best to note those things early on and not just hang out for a month or months and months without ever having a real talk because half of dating disappointments stem from assumptions that X behavior means Y when sometimes X means P to someone else.

 

The thing is, I was very laid back and "chill" with this situation. I wasn't the one putting in the effort, he was. I mean, he did ask to take me to dinner the very next night after we met for the first time for drinks. I was even a little turned off by the quickness. When he mentioned going on a cruise, I felt smothered. I'm not the type of girl that moves extremely quickly.

 

I didn't have the "what do you want" talk because we were only a few weeks to a month into it. In my opinion, that talk is too early. We were just hanging out, enjoying each other's company and seeing where things went.

 

But when HE brought up the dating sites and whether or not I was still on it, HE was the one who said that he wasn't seeing anyone else. I never brought that up. I even assumed that he was probably still hanging out with other girls. I means, its not like I can't log on to Tinder and see his location change. I'm not stupid.

 

My biggest annoyance and problem with him, and just with dating in general, is how dishonest people are. When we talked about it, I told him I was a big girl and he should have told me upfront what he wanted. I even asked him on the 2nd date if getting out of a serious, long-term relationship not that long ago was an issue and he said no. And his response was that he wasn't using me for sex and did really like me, but realized he couldn't be in a relationship now.