goodbyebluesky Posted April 25, 2016 Posted April 25, 2016 my boyfriend broke up with me last weekend. he's been very depressed lately and has a lot of things going on in his life currently and told me he doesn't feel like he can give me all the attention I deserve and make me truly happy right now and told me he's so unhappy and just needs to find that happiness before he can make me happy... he told me this when I came over to spend the night... It was so late I still ended up sleeping there and he held me through the night. he told me over and over how much he really does love me and care about me. I woke up in the morning and wasn't even sure this was really happening. when I asked if we're truly done he said he doesn't want to say "we're done" because he loves me and doesn't want to lose me from his life and that if we're meant to be we'll be in time but right now just isn't right. I went home that day. we went a few days without talking and then he texted me to make sure I'm okay and to tell me he's been thinking about me constantly and truly cares for me... he texted me the other night telling me wish you were here by pink Floyd came on the radio and it "killed him"... I told him it doesn't have to be like this but then he'll just say right now we can't be... I'm so confused. I love him a lot and want to work on a relationship with him but he's so confused and depressed himself, he doesn't know what he wants. what should I do? should I just move on or should I wait for him... for some reason I have such a hard time dealing with break ups and thinking what if I never get to be with this person again... I'm really bad at being alone so I've been pretty depressed not being able to see him...
d0nnivain Posted April 25, 2016 Posted April 25, 2016 Depressed people push people away. You can't stop this process. He doesn't love himself so it makes no sense that you love him. Also the energy it takes to sustain a relationship might be beyond him right now. Because you can't change him you have to focus on your own healing process. 2
panzerfaust69 Posted April 25, 2016 Posted April 25, 2016 Apparently passive commitment phobia partners, like me, have a more difficult time getting over a breakup, get the book "He's scared She's scared, it's helped me understand the unhealthy dynamic that I got myself into, with someone who was not available to make the effort of being in a real relationship.
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