Author Leigh 87 Posted April 25, 2016 Author Posted April 25, 2016 My brother met a woman last year and is getting married in June, she even has a 9 year old daughter, but my brother is OVER THE MOON! He cannnot wait to get married, to become a family with this woman and her daughter. He is already super close with her daughter, she plays soccer so he takes her to games and stuff. So to answer your question, yes I think there are many many men who are very excited about marriage.... and becoming one unit with another (and her kids if she has any -- a family. My brother dated A LOT of girls before her too.... one for three years. None of them felt right in the end though.... with this one he knew very quickly she was very special. My bf had only had one long term R prior to me and was single for 5 or 6 years .... So when he tells ms that he knew very quickly that I was special and felt " right" and " different " and " made for him" , I definitely don't assume he'll want to marry me though. We could have just had very strong chemistry that'll end. As you know all too well. Hopeyou're okay by the way and moving on.
whatcanitellyou Posted April 25, 2016 Posted April 25, 2016 My husband planned most of our wedding. So I'd say he was excited enough to plan it, and he seemed to have a good time. He also said he doesn't know why he waited so long to marry me because he loves being married to me. 1
xxoo Posted April 26, 2016 Posted April 26, 2016 My H expressed interest in marrying me at least a year before I agreed. He was psyched when I proposed! 3
mrs rubble Posted April 26, 2016 Posted April 26, 2016 I've nick-named my fiance "groomzilla" hahaha!!! He's so obssessed with wanting everything planned for the wedding yesterday, pretty much everything is planned and booked already for February next year, except for mine and the bridesmaids dresses- he'd pick them out and have them ordered now too if he had his way. 2
katiegrl Posted April 26, 2016 Posted April 26, 2016 My bf had only had one long term R prior to me and was single for 5 or 6 years .... So when he tells ms that he knew very quickly that I was special and felt " right" and " different " and " made for him" , I definitely don't assume he'll want to marry me though. We could have just had very strong chemistry that'll end. As you know all too well. Hopeyou're okay by the way and moving on. Actually the chemistry with my ex never went away (and probably never will), we did not break up because of that. But I hear ya re marriage. I never really believed in it and certainly don't need it ... but my ex did, and because I loved (love) him, after six years of him asking me, I finally agreed and we got engaged. But had he not wanted it, we never would have gotten engaged. And would have been very happy living together. Commitment comes from the heart, and if you and boyfriend have that and feel that, and don't wish for that marriage certificate, then more power to ya! I was just responding to your question re how men feel about marriage. Many men really go for it! They get excited about it. If a man doesn't believe in it .... which many men don't, jmo but I don't think that necessarily means he doesn't love his gf. He just doesn't believe that a piece of paper (which is how many people view it)... makes a commitment. Again commitment comes from the heart JMO. ETA: I am doing okay thanks. Moving on or trying to anyway.
clia Posted April 26, 2016 Posted April 26, 2016 No? Didn't bother me at all. I am saying that we havd lives outside of each other. Yet still savour our time together. Unlike the usual men around where I live who often moan about being stuck in the same room as their missus lol. I don't think you can compare a six month relationship, where you are likely still in the honeymoon phase, with a marriage and/or couple who has been together for years and have undergone life stress together, i.e., finances, work, kids, etc. It's not apples to apples. We'll see how you and your boyfriend are doing five years from now. But I tend to think some of that type of talk is mostly bravado anyway. My husband was very excited to get married and was quite involved with planning our wedding and honeymoon. I actually was the one who wasn't interested in getting married, so I never even raised the topic with him. He proposed of his own free will.... My male friends who have married seem quite happy as well. 4
xxoo Posted April 26, 2016 Posted April 26, 2016 There is really no doubt that at least a good portion of men really want to be married, esp since men are faster to remarry after divorce or death of a spouse than women. 3
alphamale Posted April 26, 2016 Posted April 26, 2016 no, men in general do not get excited about marriage, family, and having kids
Gloria25 Posted April 26, 2016 Posted April 26, 2016 As a guy I can admit that I have never had any real interest in marriage. This is despite being engaged once (I kind of went along with societal expectations. These days I don't care about any of that) I know a fair few married guys. While I wouldn't say they are all miserable, many of them do say things like they probably wouldn't do it again, they did it to please their partner, or to have kids (often again to please their partner!) Maybe it's an Australian thing, but I don't think guys here are much into marriage if given a choice with no pressure. Exactly....what guy in his right mind, with two functioning testicles be excited and/or involved in the details of planning a wedding? Uh, cuz this ultra feminist society and his wife to be (the guardian of vagina) tells him he better. Guys - besides those who actually picked wisely and know what marriage and family - IMO, would be nutz to sign up for marriage now a days. IMO, the majority who are still dumb enough to marry either do it out of pressure and/or desperation. BTW, I think marriage and family is a lovely thing - when done right, but sadly I don't see much of that now a days and I see where the OP is coming from. I'm not gonna commit to some guy who needs me to pay half of his bills cuz I'm his "partner". I also wanna be home to raise my kids. I want someone with God and values in his life that is cool like me. Hard to find that now a days.
hotpotato Posted April 26, 2016 Posted April 26, 2016 The ex seemed excited about marriage. We even looked at rings together, buut the rs went down the toilet. He was more excited abt it than I was, and he was with a girl for 4 years off and on before he met me. I had another guy say he may propose to me again.
Inflikted Posted April 30, 2016 Posted April 30, 2016 I mean, of course people can change what they want. Personally, I've always known that I didn't want to have kids. I have no patience for children, no tolerance for children, and I just don't have that in me. But, if I met my "perfect woman" and it was an absolute dealbreaker that I didn't want kids, I dunno, I suppose I'd give it some thought. On the flip side, I always found the idea of marriage appealing. Which I guess is weird, because it seems like a common trope that guys hate marriage. But the idea of finding someone special and committing to them seemed quite nice to me. I always hoped I'd have that one day. Although, I'm at a point now where I can say with a great deal of confidence that I'll never date, let alone marry, which caused me quite a bit of sadness for a long time, but I've come to accept it.
Laprus9 Posted May 1, 2016 Posted May 1, 2016 I don't believe in the institution of marriage, I think it's an outdated institution that heavily favours of the woman at the expense of men because that is how the legal system is positioned. I have seen several couples get married and then divorced within the first four years of marriage. It's too much risk and too little reward in my opinion.
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