Mrlonelyone Posted April 25, 2016 Posted April 25, 2016 Hello again since I haven't posted here in a great while let me reintroduce myself. I am like the name says MrLonleyOne. I am a MTF transwoman who likes men and tomboyish women and also FTM transmen. The Mr. is because my dating questions are all about my dealings with the few select XX females I've liked. Males are simple basic and easy to understand for me...just take them at their word. I've posted here for years but have been MIA for a while. My current predicament. A woman I wrote about here a lot 2-3 years back and called M has been in and out of my life since then. We got in touch when she was doing work on an aliment that has/will effect members of my family. Publication quality science. It required a change of field of research. Most people just send flowers. Then she dropped off the radar. I reached out. In the last go around she made a BIG show of saying she didn't want to hear from me again so fine. I went NC and basically forgot about her. Then I got two utterly blank text messages last month. One was from her families home phone number. In the USof A now many digitial home phone services allow for this with the use of a computer or smart phone app. I know breadcrumbs but darn it. I was weak and I asked if maybe she meant to say something. No response. Feeling hurt. To be honest the whole thing has left me feeling quite confused. Yet it was momentarily nice to know I was thought of... strange as that may sound. More importantly what I feel is a certain sense of despair that I will ever be loved the way I want to be. I mean the thing that she did, that research, is pretty capital yet we can't even talk. If someone can feel enough for me to do that really concrete thing yet act this way I must be really awful. It also makes it hard for me to really open up to anyone new. Like the bar has been set so high that for me to be serious about anyone new does not seem possible. Believe me, I've tried. Any comments, Any observations, Any one else ever felt this way? How do you snap out of feeling like your ex was pretty great, even while knowing their flaws? How do you get over meeting someone and being so close to someone who checks off 95-98% of your list?
Recommended Posts