traveler_n Posted April 24, 2016 Posted April 24, 2016 My ex called me 2 nights ago stating he was sorry, he took me for granted and he regretted ending things with me. We broke up 8 months ago (we were together 3 years). He asked if I would consider trying things with him again. I had broken up with him after a fight and tried to get back together but he wouldn't get back together with me. He now is stating he wasn't sure if he 100% loved me and marriage/kids was scaring him. He actually ended things with a girl a couple of days ago because he wasn't being treated right and he told me that he needed to go through that experience to realize a lot of things. He said that he treated her how he should have treated me and I was always there for him whenever she was not. He realizes that he was an ******* to me and he says that he has matured and changed. I told him that we could always be friends but I've moved on as lovers. He said he would love to be friends with me. We actually hung out yesterday. I went and saw his parents which felt very awkward to me (his mom started crying when she saw me) and then we hung out at his place with a friend of his. I'm actually going to be moving 10 minutes away from him next weekend and he offered to help me move. He said he wants to keep hanging out and it felt awesome to be with me yesterday. Also, he said there's a reason that we will be "neighbors" living on our own and it's a sign that we are supposed to support each other. I'm having mixed emotions about all of this. Do I keep him as a friend or if things progress do I give him another chance..or do I just drop contact with him?
Zahara Posted April 24, 2016 Posted April 24, 2016 I'm confused. You said you've moved on from him but yet you're holding out for hope. I don't think you're being honest with yourself. You got some good advice in your past threads. I would step away from him and keep no contact. He's just ended a relationship -- he could be on the rebound. Time and space -- let him heal so that he can get some mental clarity and detach from this recent relationship -- maybe then he will be be able to figure out what he actually feels for you is true rather than likely attaching to you now because he needs a crutch. It would have been one thing if he ended with this woman because he realized he wanted to be with you. He ended it because she wasn't treating him right. Otherwise he'd still be there. Protect yourself. You are likely to get hurt. 2
Satu Posted April 24, 2016 Posted April 24, 2016 (edited) This is a recipe for disaster. He wants to be with you, because she didn't treat him right... I would feel insulted in your position. Edited April 24, 2016 by Satu 4
Emilia Posted April 24, 2016 Posted April 24, 2016 So he broke up with some chick and now he is running to you because he is lonely. You are entertaining this lack of respect because..... ?? 2
LostOnes05 Posted April 24, 2016 Posted April 24, 2016 Haha, you didn't read any of the advice we gave you the other day. You're setting yourself up for another chance for him to snatch his emotions and presence from you. Have fun though since you are letting this guy back in by him just saying a few things and offering to help you move. Can he teach me his ways? Because apparently tis better to be a jerk and make your triumphant return, than to be a good guy from the start. Either way good luck.
bluefeather Posted April 25, 2016 Posted April 25, 2016 He actually ended things with a girl a couple of days ago... stop. right. there.
Shineshelly Posted April 28, 2016 Posted April 28, 2016 Hi Traveler, Have you thought about talking with this guy and sharing what you've expressed here; explaining that you're having mixed emotions and a little unsure about his intentions? I think that asking the tough questions about the relationship in the past and even what it could look like in the future, is important to ensure you don't go down the wrong path. If you're still concerned about what to do, consider reaching out for counseling from a professional or mentor. A reputable organization that has helped me in the past offers a free phone consultation and connections to counselors in your area if need-be, at 1-800-A-Family. Good luck!
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