Question to the "Dumpers"

[DevastatedDiva]

If you were the dumper after or during an intense romance/ love because of extenuating circumstances like:

 

Religious beliefs (maybe your family found out you were dating a Muslim and they are strict Christians)

 

Got transferred to another country

 

One person was being forced into an arranged marriage

 

One partner was engaged to someone else and couldn't break it and shame their family

 

One partner worked in the police and the other had been in some legal trouble

 

Something other than the dumper didn't care for their partner anymore.

 

As the dumper, do you think about your lost love and miss them? Even years later do you remember them? Do you still feel the same?

 

Before I was married I had my great love. I am 100% certain he felt the same. It ripped my heart out. I will never forget him, little details. He will always be it for me. 20 years on I still think of him a few times a month. Is that because I was the dumpee?

 

Do dumpers ever think about their lost loves? Or they never look back? We both got married. I'm getting divorced. He's married unhappily I hear, I'd never get in touch. I'm just wondering if I ever cross his mind.

 

This might be posted in the wrong place. If so, apologies.

[basil67]

Perhaps it's the romantic in me, but I think that if a person *really* cares enough, these circumstances can be changed. My now husband resigned from his job so that he wouldn't have to take an overseas posting which he'd accepted before we met.

 

Yes, it might involve standing up to family, leaving a partner or resigning from a job, but this is what we have do if we want a relationship to last. Someone who won't do these things lacks the will to really make a relationship continue.

[Emaize3]

Devastateddiva- I'm glad you're asking this question because my ex dumped me because "we were too different" and "my son". We loved eachother very much and seemed very happy. I don't think he'll ever speak to me again though. I'm curious from the dumpers too. My guess is that if he really loved me, he would have stayed so I don't think we'd ever be together again.