After No Contact - I saw my ex on POF. Is this time to start trying to get her back?

[ctrlindustries]

She broke up with me... of course wont tell me real reason as its always to avoid hurting me. she even said. she made a conscious choice to break up witth me.

 

 

We have been through a period of no contact for a month now and she has just signed up to POF back where we met and she even visited my profile and saw it.

 

 

Do I now start my text game back again to start speaking with her? Fun. Casual funny conversation as per normal procedures or do I leave it a little bit.

She has not gotten in contact with me during the no contact except where she called me and she said she had dialled by accident (on an iphone... where you cant really do that) and why would I be on her list of calls?

[LD1990]

No. She broke up with you. She hasn't shown any interest in trying again. Respect her decision to break up and respect yourself enough to move on with your life.

[gimlynick]

Yeah, don't contact her yourself.

 

If she contacts you, then fine, go for it if you want her back. But be carefull and don't go to hasty, show her that you respect her but that you are not a weak pussy that is crawling on his knees to get her back.

 

Good luck.

[smudge21]

She dumped you. If she wants you back, she's got to earn that trust that she destroyed... and that doesn't come from you chasing her. Maintain some self respect and do not chase something that doesn't want to be caught. Stay NC and please avoid finding info about her, as that will set you back. All the best.

[TaraMaiden2]

She broke up with me... of course wont tell me real reason as its always to avoid hurting me. she even said. she made a conscious choice to break up witth me.

Take it as read then, that this was not some impulsive, knee-jerk reaction. It was deliberate, calculated - and fully intended to be final.

 

 

We have been through a period of no contact for a month now and she has just signed up to POF back where we met and she even visited my profile and saw it.

You do realise that a 'period of No Contact' is both endless and limitless, right? There is no temporariness about NC when someone has deliberately, willfully and unequivocally broken up with you.

 

 

Do I now start my text game back again to start speaking with her?

This isn't a game, and no, you most certainly do not.

 

Fun. Casual funny conversation as per normal procedures or do I leave it a little bit.

If you do this, she will be able to see from 10 miles away that it's forced, contrived, false and strained. Every jocular quip will be silently screaming the entreaty "take me back, pleeeeease!!"

She has not gotten in contact with me during the no contact except where she called me and she said she had dialled by accident (on an iphone... where you cant really do that)

Yes, you can. I mistakenly dialed my mother today, whilst handling my 'phone in my handbag, looking for my diary.... (I don't keep everything recorded just electronically!)

 

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..and why would I be on her list of calls?

She doesn't need to delete you. She has no intention of calling you.

But she'll have your ID come up, if you try to call her. She won't want to be surprised by you and answer by mistake.

[ctrlindustries]

Thank you for the responses.

 

I agree with everything that has been said.

 

It's such a shame as there was nothing wrong but I guess that, that is my perspective. If someone wanted me they would tell me.

 

Thank you. I shallnt do anything.

So sad. Two people that got on so well and no real reason to end.

 

I have to continue with life however. I almost lost my job.

[Simon Phoenix]

Yeah, i'd concentrate on getting back in the good graces of your employer and not chase after a woman who dumped you.