ValenicaOranges Posted June 19, 2005 Posted June 19, 2005 I've been in a relationship on and off for the past 2 years. I am at the point where I simply cannot stand "Joe" - everything he does just irritates the hell out of me and I can't stand him touching me. He's a selfish jerk and I can't be around him anymore without getting annoyed. I'd like to tell him I simply cannot stand the sight of him anymore that he grosses me out but I'd like to break up and be an adult about it. He's in love with me but I'm NOT in love with him anymore - he's turned me off completely and his arrogant selfish attitudes have killed all feelings for him. How do you break it off with someone like this. Other than starting a fight and then blowing a fuse - I don't know how I can get rid of him for good. When you've gotten to the point where they've done nothing wrong - you just can't stand them anymore - how do you end it? Should I just be rude and say "You're a creep - I'm outta this relationship - don't come around anymore"...????
SexKitten Posted June 19, 2005 Posted June 19, 2005 just pick something that is obviously very final. and ugh, any way you can, just get rid of him.
LucreziaBorgia Posted June 19, 2005 Posted June 19, 2005 There's no need to be rude, really. Tell him you need to talk, and ask him to meet you in a neutral public place. When you get there, break it to him. Be crystal clear, leave no room for ambiguity, and do not back down. The idea is to be calm, firm and decisive. Do not be hostile or angry. Be calm, collected and keep your voice even. Tell him that you are no longer happy in this relationship, that you are breaking up with him, and that while you can be 'friendly' there is no room for 'friends'. There is no need to repeat anything or 'clarify'. Tell him you are breaking up with him, and then tell him that you have to leave, then get up and leave. Do not let him drag you into an argument. There really is no reason to hear him out, or outline why you are breaking up - all that will do is cause a pointless argument. The only reason you would want to bring it up, is if you wanted him to improve on these things for a reconciliation. Since there will be no reconciliation: there is no point in bringing up stuff you don't like in the relationship. Basically, you aren't happy and you are leaving. Period. Then, make arrangements to get your stuff if you have to (make sure you take a friend over with you when you do).
SoleMate Posted June 19, 2005 Posted June 19, 2005 Yup, do what LB said. BTW, how can we reconcile his "love for you" with his "selfish behavior towards you"? What IS love, boys and girls?
ValenciaOranges Posted June 19, 2005 Posted June 19, 2005 Solemate - that is truly a good question. I never looked at it that way - and now that I have, I do have to question if he really loves me as selfish as he is.........thanks for opening my eyes to that. I think he knows what's coming - after he called me this morning and I said I didn't want to be with him today and cut the conversation short - he hasn't called back. I won't call him - when he calls me I will break up with him over the phone. The things of mine that are at his place are of no significance and not worth picking up (couple of clothing items - that's it). When he contacts me again I'm going to just end it. This will be a huge load off my shoulders to end this relationship. I know when it gets so bad that I just cringe at the sound of his voice - it's time to get rid of him.
SexKitten Posted June 19, 2005 Posted June 19, 2005 sometimes it's just over. been there, and it sucks because you start to resent the person, even if they didn't really do anything. good for you, though, not draggging it out. that's unfair to him and torment for you.
ValenciaOranges Posted June 19, 2005 Posted June 19, 2005 Resentment - oh yes.........I've got major resentment - I cannot stand to hear his voice or look at him. I've broken up with him before and he just won't go away - but it's been my fault for giving him 2nd chances and agreeing to be friends - he always wants more and starts clinging to me and smothering me. I have NO feelings for him whatsover and only feel disgust - I can end it for good and not let him back in my life because I just don't care anymore......I'm tired of making continuous excuses as to why I don't want to be with him - he doesn't seem to have a clue or take a hint. When you get to the "I really don't care if you got hit by a bus" stage - it's pretty much over. It's just hard telling someone "I don't like you anymore - go away".
SexKitten Posted June 20, 2005 Posted June 20, 2005 Originally posted by ValenciaOranges When you get to the "I really don't care if you got hit by a bus" stage - it's pretty much over. :lmao: yes, i'd say. do yourself the favour and run fast in the opposite direction of this person.
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