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Friendzone or I just put her on the spot..?


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Posted (edited)

I know this is going to be long but please take your time to read it.:)

 

This is Benny and its my first post here in this forum, currently in High School (16 yrs old) and I study Music. Both theoretical and Instrumental music, I play Piano mainly and Drums just for fun, or as a hobby.

 

So there is this girl at my school, let's just call her Anna for now (Dont wanna mention her real name). I've had contact with Anna but like very brief short conversations, and mostly it would be her coming up to me and asking like what I was working on or whatever. She is also a very close friend with a friend of mine, so she comes to our classroom every other day to stay with my friend for like 10-20 minutes.

 

So 2 days ago there were these competitions for Music Harmony which were held about 4 hours away where I live, and they lasted for 2 days, so I had to sleep there for 1 night with 2 girls, they are both very good friends of mine, which one of them is a very close friend to Anna. So after we were done with the competitions us 3 decided to hang out around the town and see for a place to eat our dinner, and Anna (the girl I started liking) was coming with us as well. So we went out eating and it was great, she started flirting, complimenting me and showing a lot of interest in me.

 

So we finished with our dinner and we started walking around the town and checking the place out, she was also carrying this heavy bag with herself where she had some clothes and stuff that she got, so she asked me if I could hold it for her, and I was like yeah sure. So we walked around the city for like 40 minutes, during that time she started to push herself more by flirting with me and throwing compliments and I started doing the same. She kept saying to me that I was cute, and that she really liked me a lot and stuff. So we had a great time, we had cool conversations, we laughed and all good (I'm pretty funny as well, at least that's what everyone says for me, lol. I don't take life too serious :D), so it was great.

 

Then we went back to the hotel and Anna stayed there for like an hour and then she had to leave, during her stay she started flirting a lot more though, she kept saying that she liked me a lot and that I was cute and stuff. So we spent an hour in the room and she asked for us to come with her to the train station so that she wouldn't have to go alone there so me and my friend went with her while the other close friend of Anna decided to stay because she was really tired. During our way there she put her arm around me and started leaning towards me and we just kept talking some casual conversations. Anyway, so we arrived at the train station, we hugged each other, she got up on the train and right as the train was about to go, she threw me a kiss from the window, I waved her and did the same and that's how that day ended.

 

I was really happy because she showed some strong signals and I liked her back, and on the way back even my friend was like: "Wow, she reeeeeeaaally seems to like you, she showed some really strong signals today even though you two just started talking today." This honestly made me very happy because I started liking her a lot as well, then when I got to the hotel another good friend of mine texted me on Facebook and he was like: "Yo I saw you guys hanging our earlier with that girl, I think she likes you a lot." So not just me but even my friends noticed this, (2-3 of them said this to me) so I thought that I had a very big chance with this girl even though I've only known her for 6 hours.

 

So tomorrow I went to the competition, finished it and got home with the first train that came, I also won 1st place there so was very happy. After I got home I started texting her, so I started with just a simple heeey. And we started chatting a little, she also congratulated me for the 1st place I got in Music Harmony :D and I congratulated her as well because she also won 1st place in her category. And then I started flirting with her a bit through text and she was like: are you hitting on me? :D, and I was honest so I replied with: Oooom, maybe. And then she replied: well I appreciate your honesty, then I replied to her: Should I call that a mistake? then she replied: heey its fine, we can be friends, I really like you... And I was just, like shocked. Honestly, like what? 3 friends of mine called me the night before saying to me that she was showing some good signs of interest, and by that I mean like reeeaally strong signs and then she replied with that? Did I make a mistake by texting her this soon and put her on the spot? I think I should've just progressed it for a few more days (cuz I can see her in school everyday), talk to her a little bit more, change her mood and maybe call her out on a date when I would see her at school instead of texting her.

 

So what do you think, did she just Friend zone me or was It my mistake for texting her too soon and putting her on the spot? The reason I did text her immediately the day after was because she showed a lot of interest, so I didn't really think that she would straight up reject me and put me in the friend zone. Even though she was nice doing it. I also saw her today at school, she came up to me and hugged me, we didn't really talk though. Just asked her what's up and that's all.

 

Is there a way to get her back? I really like her and I have a very strong feeling she likes me back and not just as a friend but more then that, I think I just put her on the spot. I can't go NC with her because I see her everyday at school. Or should I just leave her and move on?

 

EDIT: I also take care of my self a lot, dress up probably better then everyone else at school, smell good and all that. So I'm not a messy, smelly student! :p Also I wasn't acting needy and desperate, I didn't want to show her that like she's the only girl I look after or something like that.

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
language~T
Posted

You didn't do anything wrong. She told you outright you were cute and she liked you. Now, that alone could be something she would say to someone like a little brother, but not when put together with her touching you and blowing you kisses. I don't know what happened there. But texting can always be misunderstood very easily. She said, You flirting? You said, Yes. She said, It's okay we can be friends. Maybe "friends" means touching and blowing kisses and saying you're cute to her. If so, GREAT! Let's have more of that.

 

Could she be a simple attention seeker who likes to flirt and feels most comfortable and takes it farther when the other person isn't flirting back? Maybe. She IS a teenage girl, after all. But either way, I wouldn't let that stop me from asking her out. Now, you could go the safe route and ask that whole group back out and SEE ifs he amps it up or what. But it's risky because now she knows you like her, she may WAIT for you to be the one to flirt with her, so if you do it, you must take the risk of flirting with her.

Posted

You're 16, she's 16. This is going to happen a lot in the next few years.

 

- She's enjoying the the flirt, the fact that people like her etc. Doesn't mean she wants to take it any further. Or it could just mean she likes playing with your emotions. No-one said 16yr olds were mature or likely to behave in consistent ways. :roll eyes:

 

- Easy way out is to ask her on a date, tell her it's a date, you're not interested in being her friend. If she says no then move on. She'll learn you won't stick around waiting for breadcrumbs and you'll learn that sometimes this is just the only way to deal with things.

Posted

Just be kool about it and sit back, be a little aloof....let her come to you, text you, etc......

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