First date is close to her birthday. Need some gift and confidence tips

[GuyOfAverageness]

I've been talking to this girl (from another city) online for nearly two months now. I'm 18 and she's 16. We're finally meeting up, but it's going to happen one day before her 17th birthday. So we're not technically in a relationship yet, even though we've already admitted to liking each other, talked on the phone a few times and texted/chatted for hours almost every day.

 

She seems really mature for 16 and has mentioned her classmates acting "too childish" for her to ever consider any of them as "boyfriend material". Also, she likes that I'm more mature, I know what I want and she's guessing I'm pretty confident in real life. She's even repeatedly asked me, in roundabout ways, if I'm interested in her, because "I'm already an adult". So I'm guessing she wants me to "lead the way" and be really confident, because that's what she's attracted to.

 

Therefore, I feel I've got a couple of problems on my hands:

 

1. I think she's developed pretty high expectations for me and I feel 50/50 about my confidence. Mostly due to me only having 5 real dates in my lifetime. One of which ended in 15 minutes, after the girl lied about having to be somewhere and stopped answering my texts. I assume this was because I bored her, since I was a little timid and paused to think of stuff to say a couple of times and she had a very forward, "street-smart", tomboyish kind of personality. I usually need to "feel people out" before i can get really confident around them. I've gotten better at it since then, but I'd still love a few tips on projecting confidence via expression or kino on a first date.

2. I should probably get her something for her birthday? Problem is, I have no idea as to what would be a cool birthday gift to give if we're only meeting for the first time. On one hand, I think it should just be something cute and symbolic because we're only meeting for the first time. On the other, we have been chatting for a while now, we talk about personal stuff all the time and we've already admitted to liking each other. Also, I've never been in this kind of situation so I don't know what would be a proper gift at all.

 

Thank you, potential love savers!

[Lady2163]

For her birthday gift, I would get her one rose - in a color other than red and a nice/cute bud vase. If you go to an actual,flower shop, they should have different choices and they will out some greenery with the rose.

 

The rose is the sweet gesture, the vase is the thing she could keep forever if the relationship worked out. "Your grandpa gave that to me on our first date, the day before my 17th birthday."

 

I don't know that you want to go too overboard with the gift giving. I'm trying to think of small tokens that would be lasting.

[clia]

I agree that you don't want to go overboard, but I agree something very small would be sweet. I like the idea of a single rose. Or maybe a small bouquet of some other flowers. Or a fancy cupcake or cookie. Or a sparkly bottle of nail polish (if she likes that kind of thing.). Don't spend more than $10.

 

You'll be fine, so stop worrying! You're young, you aren't supposed to be an experienced dater yet!

 

Have fun and good luck!

[d0nnivain]

I went on a date from OLD a few days before my birthday once. The guy got me a single flower. I thought that was sweet; it told me he was kind & that he paid attention to detail. Had he gotten me anything else I would have thought it was over the top. As Lady2163 said, do not get a red rose.

 

Save the gifts for after you have been in an established relationship but do acknowledge her special day in some SMALL way.

[smackie9]

A card and a box of her favorite candy or chocolate. Food/taste/smell/flavors triggers good memories. Make sure it's wrapped in some glittery paper all fancy like.

[fitnessfan365]

You haven't even met her yet. So you shouldn't get her anything for her birthday IMO. That would only be appropriate if you two were already dating.

 

All that you really need to do is just acknowledge her birthday. For example, find a funny YouTube video that reminds you of what you know about her so far. Then send it saying "Hope this gives you a laugh on your big day. Happy birthday!"