JustAnotherLostLove Posted April 6, 2016 Share Posted April 6, 2016 (edited) Since we split (3 year relationship). Sadness is fading, but now I feel angry. How's everyone else doing? Edited April 6, 2016 by JustAnotherLostLove 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Weathersf1 Posted April 6, 2016 Share Posted April 6, 2016 I'm about to hit the 4 month mark, total NC and I'm not feeling too great. They say, it takes time. I guess I just need to wait and see. I feel anger, sadness, guilt, pain and they all come at the same time one after the other. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Steven1 Posted April 6, 2016 Share Posted April 6, 2016 Hard to tell.... Haven't seen her since New Years Eve (2015) , We broke up about February 12th..., went 8 weeks NC.....texted a few days...now about 9/10 days NC again... I was extremely down, but I'm quite a bit better now. Still a bit bummed out by it all, but getting better. Link to post Share on other sites
Author JustAnotherLostLove Posted April 7, 2016 Author Share Posted April 7, 2016 I'm about to hit the 4 month mark, total NC and I'm not feeling too great. They say, it takes time. I guess I just need to wait and see. I feel anger, sadness, guilt, pain and they all come at the same time one after the other. Have you gone no contact? Link to post Share on other sites
Author JustAnotherLostLove Posted April 7, 2016 Author Share Posted April 7, 2016 Hard to tell.... Haven't seen her since New Years Eve (2015) , We broke up about February 12th..., went 8 weeks NC.....texted a few days...now about 9/10 days NC again... I was extremely down, but I'm quite a bit better now. Still a bit bummed out by it all, but getting better. That's how it seems to go. She would text me on holidays/birthdays etc. But now I don't hear from her anymore. I think it's just them slowly letting go of us. Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted April 7, 2016 Share Posted April 7, 2016 Your anger is an important part of your healing process. It shows that you've made significant progress. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TheSwanGirl Posted April 8, 2016 Share Posted April 8, 2016 Two months since BU and being left for someone else, after five years of relationship. Nothing great going on in my life. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Weathersf1 Posted April 8, 2016 Share Posted April 8, 2016 Have you gone no contact? Complete no contact. No social media, calls, text, nothing whatsoever. I have no clue if she's even alive or not. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
drseuss Posted April 9, 2016 Share Posted April 9, 2016 Been a fair old while since I've posted on, I'm over 8 months nc and it feels great Of course I think about her but I've met and been with a fair few people since and soon realised there is plenty of people out there and being single is great when your happy , I do whatever I want whenever I want with who ever I want Enjoy yourself , you might not be single for forever 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author JustAnotherLostLove Posted April 9, 2016 Author Share Posted April 9, 2016 Two months since BU and being left for someone else, after five years of relationship. Nothing great going on in my life. That's tough Swan, I'm sorry. But if someone is willing to give you 5 years of their life, than you must be great, even if they did leave. I'm sure it wasn't exclusively your fault at all. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
sorano Posted April 9, 2016 Share Posted April 9, 2016 (edited) Being angry is ok. My sadness is also fading. Now I just feel angry. Once the anger is gone, everybody should be ok. It takes time. I will never wish my ex gf anything well. I have no idea what she is doing. Don't really care either. she is just another useless person in my eyes. I honestly don't even care if she is sick, doing well, good or bad things happen, etc. No contact, and not one flying F.... is given Edited April 9, 2016 by sorano 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TimmyC Posted April 10, 2016 Share Posted April 10, 2016 I'm so proud of you!!! Anger means your healing and almost over the person. Next step will be acceptance, stay strong! For me, I'm approaching 3 weeks and I'm doing better.I still do miss her, but I've had so much positive insite from friends, family, and people on the forum. Started to realize just how abusive an manipulative she was. Once you are able to look past the good and see the truth it becomes easier. Link to post Share on other sites
Author JustAnotherLostLove Posted April 13, 2016 Author Share Posted April 13, 2016 I'm so proud of you!!! Anger means your healing and almost over the person. Next step will be acceptance, stay strong! For me, I'm approaching 3 weeks and I'm doing better.I still do miss her, but I've had so much positive insite from friends, family, and people on the forum. Started to realize just how abusive an manipulative she was. Once you are able to look past the good and see the truth it becomes easier. Don't know if you're referring to me, but thank you if you are. I think the last thing I gotta do is remove her from social media now. I have all her post blocked, but on average, I still find myself wondering, and checking on her once every 2 weeks or so. I think a part of me wants to see her with someone else, so that I can have the strength to remove her. And it appears that she might be now. Just seems unfair that she gets to dump me, and move on, but I have to remain hurt. She's the one who shoe horned herself into my life. I initially ignored her for the longest time, but eventually gave in, and the rest is history. Suppose that's just how it goes tho. Link to post Share on other sites
Author JustAnotherLostLove Posted April 14, 2016 Author Share Posted April 14, 2016 (edited) So it's been 7 months since we split, and we're still friends on FB. I blocked her all her post, but still can't find the strength to just delete her entirely. Anyways, I still find myself checking up on her, I'd say once every 2 weeks on average. And I'm ashamed to admit that, but it's true. So today, I thought maybe it was time to delete her, and probably just block her profile entirely. But then I realized, I could just unblock her and see her anytime I want. However, if she blocks me, than she'd be gone for good. No buts about it. Would it be wrong, or weird of me to ask her to block me? I'm sure she wouldn't care too much, and I think it'd help me move on faster, since I'm clearly having trouble. Thoughts? Edited April 14, 2016 by JustAnotherLostLove Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted April 14, 2016 Share Posted April 14, 2016 Yes, it would be totally weird of you to ask her to block you. Just unfriend her and be done with it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author JustAnotherLostLove Posted April 14, 2016 Author Share Posted April 14, 2016 Yes, it would be totally weird of you to ask her to block you. Just unfriend her and be done with it. You make it sound really easy. Link to post Share on other sites
Draper Posted April 14, 2016 Share Posted April 14, 2016 No, your having some trouble letting go and that's okay but please believe me when I say contacting her will send you only in the direction you don't want to be going, even if it's with the intentions of having her block you.. You just have to do it - delete her and block her. It hurts and doing it will be a miserable experience but once I committed to removing all the fragments of her from my life, I was surprised at how little I was compelled to check up on her. Seriously though, I'd sooner recommend that you delete your facebook and give your computer a hot shower than I would tell you to contact your ex for any reason. Link to post Share on other sites
Author JustAnotherLostLove Posted April 14, 2016 Author Share Posted April 14, 2016 No, your having some trouble letting go and that's okay but please believe me when I say contacting her will send you only in the direction you don't want to be going, even if it's with the intentions of having her block you.. You just have to do it - delete her and block her. It hurts and doing it will be a miserable experience but once I committed to removing all the fragments of her from my life, I was surprised at how little I was compelled to check up on her. Seriously though, I'd sooner recommend that you delete your facebook and give your computer a hot shower than I would tell you to contact your ex for any reason. It's kind of uplifting, hearing you say that you didn't care much after the fact. Maybe I won't care either. I think i can do it. Link to post Share on other sites
BC1980 Posted April 14, 2016 Share Posted April 14, 2016 You make it sound really easy. It's not easy, but I think it's important that you find the strength to do it yourself. I think that would give you some confidence. Link to post Share on other sites
Author JustAnotherLostLove Posted April 14, 2016 Author Share Posted April 14, 2016 It's not easy, but I think it's important that you find the strength to do it yourself. I think that would give you some confidence. That's a really good point. Didn't even think about it like that. Link to post Share on other sites
Draper Posted April 14, 2016 Share Posted April 14, 2016 It's kind of uplifting, hearing you say that you didn't care much after the fact. Maybe I won't care either. I think i can do it. You can, man. I don't really know how to put it into words but I guess I had finally realized that the only way I was going to start to move on was if I cut her out of my life completely - and then I finally built myself up to do it. There's been temptations over the months but you just have to remember that she is part of the past, as sad as that is. Keep looking forward, there's no telling what you might miss if your stuck dwelling on the past. Good luck mate. Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted April 14, 2016 Share Posted April 14, 2016 So it's been 7 months since we split, and we're still friends on FB. I blocked her all her post, but still can't find the strength to just delete her entirely. Anyways, I still find myself checking up on her, I'd say once every 2 weeks on average. And I'm ashamed to admit that, but it's true. So today, I thought maybe it was time to delete her, and probably just block her profile entirely. But then I realized, I could just unblock her and see her anytime I want. However, if she blocks me, than she'd be gone for good. No buts about it. Would it be wrong, or weird of me to ask her to block me? I'm sure she wouldn't care too much, and I think it'd help me move on faster, since I'm clearly having trouble. Thoughts? Yes, it'd be really weird. Just do it yourself. Don't depend on others to do the work that you need to do. But yeah, if an ex of mine asked me to do that I'd think she was an overdramatic nutbar. Link to post Share on other sites
Author JustAnotherLostLove Posted April 14, 2016 Author Share Posted April 14, 2016 Yes, it'd be really weird. Just do it yourself. Don't depend on others to do the work that you need to do. But yeah, if an ex of mine asked me to do that I'd think she was an overdramatic nutbar. Haha, nutbar. You coulda just said nut. But I think a nutbar implies something extra nutty. I do think I have a few extra nuts tho. Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted April 14, 2016 Share Posted April 14, 2016 Haha, nutbar. You coulda just said nut. But I think a nutbar implies something extra nutty. I do think I have a few extra nuts tho. Either way, you have to man up (for lack of a better term) and do the heavy lifting yourself. Sure it's not easy, but most things worth doing aren't easy. Link to post Share on other sites
Author JustAnotherLostLove Posted April 14, 2016 Author Share Posted April 14, 2016 You can, man. I don't really know how to put it into words but I guess I had finally realized that the only way I was going to start to move on was if I cut her out of my life completely - and then I finally built myself up to do it. There's been temptations over the months but you just have to remember that she is part of the past, as sad as that is. Keep looking forward, there's no telling what you might miss if your stuck dwelling on the past. Good luck mate. Yeah, that's good justifiable advice. I needed to hear that, I know what I have to do now. I guess it's just hard, cause I feel that I lost everything overnight. We were together for years, I was close to her family, we had money saved up for a house, bla bla bla. I never lost anything so profound before. And to see her, being better off without me. It just makes everything harder. Link to post Share on other sites
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