T27 Posted April 12, 2016 Posted April 12, 2016 I (22/M) dated a girl (20) for about 7 weeks. I wanna know what happened. She's always had severe depression and hates herself no matter what, but I was always there for her and did everything I could to help her. She told me she loved me after 3 weeks. Well, long story short she's gone back and forth with her feelings the whole time, but what's remained constant is she wanted to always see me. Her mom and sister even told her to keep me because they liked me, which shocked her because they never liked her ex like they liked me. Keep in mind we live 2 hours apart, and she was willing to see me every week. The 1st 3 weeks she did, then I made the effort after my truck was fixed to see her. Everything was fine, till April 10th. We were supposed to go camping this week, and April 10th I told her I couldn't go because campgrounds aren't open yet. She told me "Idk if I want this anymore Tyler" Then with each message she got worse and worse. I didn't cry or complain, I just asked her why she felt that way. So after 7 weeks she ended it. Today she went berserk on me and said she doesn't really care if I'm in her life. In a very serious, non emotional (maybe annoyed) way she basically told me she doesn't care about me at all. I played it cool telling her I just didn't want her to regret her decision because I just wanna see her happy. Well the worst part, is this happened last year to me to, and I got dumped on April 10th then too.....Why did she dump me? I feel like there's two reasons. 1) she doesn't know wtf she wants and will realize later what she's lost. 2) she has someone else. Considering she had no one, it seems weird she would kick me to the curb and wanna see other people immediately. TL;DR: Why did she leave? I'm smart with understanding emotions, but I'm terrible at understanding break ups.
LD1990 Posted April 12, 2016 Posted April 12, 2016 She's always had severe depression and hates herself no matter what That's why. People with emotional issues like that aren't stable partners. Add in the fact that she's only 20 and this didn't stand much of a chance. Be glad it was only seven weeks and go NC so you can heal. 2
Author T27 Posted April 12, 2016 Author Posted April 12, 2016 That's why. People with emotional issues like that aren't stable partners. Add in the fact that she's only 20 and this didn't stand much of a chance. Be glad it was only seven weeks and go NC so you can heal. I understand that, but my issue is I feel like the only person who goes through this. I've had a couple buddies date girls like this and they did fine..It seems like every girl that I date thinks I'm ugly (at some point my 3 exes have all said they didn't find me as attractive as their exes). I feel like if I looked great, the relationship wouldn't have ended. I'm the only guy any of my exes broke up with...they were always the one to get dumped.
d0nnivain Posted April 12, 2016 Posted April 12, 2016 You can't really believe things your EXs tell you. EXs say things just so they can cause you pain. As for this girl, she was never stable enough to start with. Anybody who says ILY 3 weeks in can be trusted to know their own mind. If it started that fast, as you found out the hard way, it ends fast & hard.
LostOnes05 Posted April 13, 2016 Posted April 13, 2016 The last time I was broken up with, I wasn't angry about it ending. I was angry with what I let myself go through before it ended. But I see myself as a great catch and it was truly her loss, given her "dating" history. That's the way you have to look at things. You wasted some time with her, but she lost out on someone great. I'm sure she'll call you when she needs an ego boost...it'll be tempting, but don't answer. I was dumped again on the same date as my first girlfriend dumped me. I actually had a good laugh about that when I looked at my calendar. And like clockwork, the girl who dumped me kept reaching out. Everyone takes their lumps, you'll get through this. Just learn from the experience and realize that you can't save em all.
mightycpa Posted April 13, 2016 Posted April 13, 2016 Mathematically, most relationships end. Why? There are a lot of superficial reasons, your appearance, the way you chew your food, your job or lack thereof, your smarts, your education, the clothes you wear, or maybe because you're a terrible lover or you don't shower and you stink. It could be that you don't treat people nicely, or maybe you're too nice. It can be about a million more things they see in you that they don't find attractive, or at least, not attractive enough. But in the end, there's really only one reason and I've distilled it into the Single Unified Theory of Breakups. That theory states: You two weren't a match at this time in your lives. It's always that simple. Always.
Recommended Posts