TheBathWater Posted April 12, 2016 Posted April 12, 2016 As a side note, I might not message his girlfriend in this particular situation. In my own dating history though, I did message an ex-boyfriend of a woman I broke up with and let him know she cheated on him. I chose to do this because he questioned whether or not she did this while they were together and not having closure drove him mad. She was sneaking around on me too and I found out. Had I not, my suspicions would have drove me mad too. Sometimes it is better to have the closure and know your mind is not playing tricks on you.
Damaged217 Posted April 13, 2016 Posted April 13, 2016 I know not everyone will agree with me on this, but I would define this as cheating. To me, cheating is not limited to physical touch with another person. To me, cheating is any intentional act of dishonesty where a person goes outside of a relationship and moves toward someone else in a way that would make their partner question the relationship if they knew. This dude was not innocently catching feelings for other people and then still choosing to commit to his relationship - he was intentionally advertising himself for new connections without the knowledge of his partner. I was just recently this fool of a GF who had a BF on a dating site. I completely think this is cheating. There is NO reason for someone in a relationship to be on a dating site. They are lying and hiding what they are doing and are not on there for anything good. Totally cheating. Also, being in this situation, I would have appreciated being told what my BF was up to, as long as proof was attached. Women need to look out for each other. There's too many scumbags out there getting away with things.
Cinnamonstix Posted April 13, 2016 Posted April 13, 2016 I would personally really appreciate being told that my bf was messaging women on a dating site. That would save me a lot of time and a lot of grief. Plus, I don't believe in karma. I wouldn't use it as an excuse to not do the right thing. 2
TheBathWater Posted April 14, 2016 Posted April 14, 2016 I was just recently this fool of a GF who had a BF on a dating site. I completely think this is cheating. There is NO reason for someone in a relationship to be on a dating site. They are lying and hiding what they are doing and are not on there for anything good. Totally cheating. Exactly. It doesn't make sense to me to say it's okay for people in relationships to go on dating sites, meet up with others they're sexually interested in, etc... "as long as they don't physically touch." Come on, right? There is nothing innocent about it. How far are we supposed to let people go? This is why I say cheating is defined more by dishonesty than anything else, regardless of touch. I would never tell a woman "you can't go out with so and so", etc... I believe in letting people do what they want, but I also believe in healthy relationships and would never stay with someone who is being dishonest and flirting with danger. They can do what they want, sure, but at a certain point I will say that I won't be around anymore. If I were this dude's girlfriend that the OP is writing about, and I knew what he was up to, I would either have a serious talk with him and tell him that this is not acceptable and he needs to work something out with me if he is unhappy in the relationship, or if he has decided to go outside of the relationship than I would no longer be sticking around.
Hughes101 Posted April 14, 2016 Posted April 14, 2016 I think she was chatting to him on an online dating site, then came across him on Facebook. Literally?
Zippy2000 Posted April 14, 2016 Posted April 14, 2016 For the record, I don't have any attachment to this guy. I will not be meddling. I already called him out on the dating site, at the risk of looking like a stalker. Probably freaked him the hell out already. I don't need to take it any further. Karma will take care of the rest... You will not be meddling? Well you are.....youre meddling with his replationship. It could drive the couple together and call you out. It could make him bitter, mean and twisted and get his own ack on you. Up to you what you want to do but please dont come back and let me say "I told you so".
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