LookAtThisPOst Posted June 26, 2016 Posted June 26, 2016 I don't know how it is for women, but for men there's an extremely strong and prevalent peer pressure to be sexually active. From the time you are about 15 and up, men talk about women and sex, and if you cannot contribute, then you feel completely inadequate. They will ask you about it, prod you about it, harass you about it. That's why so many young guys feel so much pressure to have sex and find a GF. Social pressure. I mean, in reality, sex really isn't even that good. Then, when you get to your late 30s, it totally disappears. Other guys will be invested in their careers and families, and discussion in formal places (work) becomes surficial. I know a few guys I work with I'm almost sure have never had a woman and are in their 40s ... and they are free about to go about their business. Anyway, congratulations. Yeah, when I was in high school, I wasn't sexually active...usually based on the upbringing of my parents in those days. To them, having sex is something you shouldn't do as a teen. Period. So when I'd hear all this talk about kids who had parents that really let them do what they want...kind of sad. I hear crap about how some people did it to each other under the bleachers. lol
William Posted June 26, 2016 Posted June 26, 2016 Folks, this is an older thread and the thread starter returns and engages periodically so we'll leave it open but, noting moderation cleaning up some threadjacks of late and sanctioning members for that, I'll ask members to remain focused on the thread starter's milieu either the original starting post content or their periodic updates. We have plenty of other space available for members to start threads on their own dating and relationship issues. In fact, we have unlimited space. Thanks!
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted July 2, 2016 Posted July 2, 2016 Okay, enough of me asking the same question in this thread, I'll just bury it that I'm glad it finally happened for you OP, despite being age 40, I wish the the movie the 40-year old virgin had never been made
Author hbpencils Posted July 3, 2016 Author Posted July 3, 2016 I understand where your coming from Look At This Post, my mother was the kill joy, if i walked home from school with a boy, she would jump down my throat and ask who he was, what he wanted and lecture me on sex and everything, even if it was a guy friend. The other day i looked through my FB friends list, nearly all the guy friends i have have been vetted or picked by my mother. I have a sister who lives with a man and guess what her man was picked for her, he isn't that nice to her, he's a bit boring, but my mum insists he's a good choice for her. Now my gentleman, my mother didn't pick for me, he picked me and she loves him to pieces, she has met him with his daughter when i was just getting to know him, but unlike my sister and her man, my gentleman doesn't stand for my mother's pressure tactics, she's wanting grand children and he does the right thing, he defends me and says it's up to me and when i feel ready for a baby. She's also been hinting at a wedding, although we've known each other for a few years, he calmly lets her know that there is no rush, it takes a lot of pressure off of me.
Author hbpencils Posted July 3, 2016 Author Posted July 3, 2016 My question for you Bronze Age, with the posts about my age, are you single? Are you having the same issue i had?, remember my gentleman is my first boyfriend ever, he was the first guy i kissed, the first man i shared a bed with, albeit he is still being fussy over sex. I had actually resigned myself Bronze Age to just being forever alone that i was ugly, not interesting enough, but the man i'm with he pursued me, he wooed me, he baked for me, he bought me chocolates and showered me with attention, then i turned him down. He came back into my life and i got him, but i could not have had that chance had he not come back to help out where i work. When i was getting to know him and his previous relationship was winding down, his ex had already moved on, i used to cry myself to sleep after seeing him at work wanting him, wanting him to hold me. And i wanted to hold him to take his pain away, but typical me, he did everything right he flirted with me, i fluffed it up. I'm sure Bronze Age if your in the same boat as i was and could well be again, this is still a young relationship, you will find someone. I'm just assuming.
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted July 3, 2016 Posted July 3, 2016 My question for you Bronze Age, with the posts about my age, are you single? Are you having the same issue i had?, remember my gentleman is my first boyfriend ever, he was the first guy i kissed, the first man i shared a bed with, albeit he is still being fussy over sex. I had actually resigned myself Bronze Age to just being forever alone that i was ugly, not interesting enough, but the man i'm with he pursued me, he wooed me, he baked for me, he bought me chocolates and showered me with attention, then i turned him down. He came back into my life and i got him, but i could not have had that chance had he not come back to help out where i work. When i was getting to know him and his previous relationship was winding down, his ex had already moved on, i used to cry myself to sleep after seeing him at work wanting him, wanting him to hold me. And i wanted to hold him to take his pain away, but typical me, he did everything right he flirted with me, i fluffed it up. I'm sure Bronze Age if your in the same boat as i was and could well be again, this is still a young relationship, you will find someone. I'm just assuming. Ya I'm in my late 20's and never had a before
Author hbpencils Posted July 3, 2016 Author Posted July 3, 2016 All i can say Bronze Age is you have a long life ahead of you, your late 20s and there is plenty of time. Think about what interests you and see if there is a group you can join or something? I didn't have many interests, but with my gentleman i'm having to learn a lot of new interests to keep up with him, although today he's been quite relaxed and not his usual lets do everything now, now, now! I think Bronze Age you will meet someone who is amazing and nice for you and someone you can enjoy spending time with. Trust me, i never thought i would meet anyone and at times i'm biting my lip constantly to not revert back to my bossy self and start ordering my gentleman around, but i know what he would say to me if i did.
Author hbpencils Posted July 3, 2016 Author Posted July 3, 2016 Don't get bogged down in thought about sex, my mother made sex and intimacy seem like it was something dirty and something i should never engage in, but i understand there is a sort of guy thing that if your not having sex like the other guys you can feel a bit left out. Take my gentleman, we sleep next to each other, he hasn't made any moves on me, he cuddles and kisses me and sometimes will touch my boobs, however despite all my gallant efforts to seduce him and give me what i want, he is fussy not concerned what others think, he will do it in his own time i suppose. Maybe you could take a leaf out of his book Bronze Age, don't care what others are doing and do what you want to do and live your life the way you want to live it, certainly my gentleman does and his attitude is, if i want to be in his life then i go at his pace. I don't think you have anything to worry about.
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted July 4, 2016 Posted July 4, 2016 In the thread discussion titled "I'm starting to believe I'll never find anyone", I wrote something very specific in regards to having a reference in terms of having good positive past experience with girls that I feel would not make me detest having to be the initiator so much, just thought I'd say that here so that way I don't have to repeat what I said in another thread
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted July 4, 2016 Posted July 4, 2016 My mistake, it was in the thread titled "incapable of being loved"
Hamish57a Posted July 4, 2016 Posted July 4, 2016 Take a chance and ask him out, take the the lead, guys love it when they know a woman likes them so do it. Be creative. What's the worse that can happen and have fun
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted July 5, 2016 Posted July 5, 2016 Take a chance and ask him out, take the the lead, guys love it when they know a woman likes them so do it. Be creative. What's the worse that can happen and have fun Ya except the vast majority of women are stubbornly adamant about being passive
Author hbpencils Posted July 10, 2016 Author Posted July 10, 2016 Is there a particular woman you like BronzeAge that you want to be your girlfriend? You could do something that doesn't require your voice if your nervous about doing the asking out bit.
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted July 11, 2016 Posted July 11, 2016 Is there a particular woman you like BronzeAge that you want to be your girlfriend? You could do something that doesn't require your voice if your nervous about doing the asking out bit. Are you referring to online dating? Well there's one girl I'm messaging on Tinder right now and just recently gave me her number and now I'm just asking her when is she available so we can meet up, but first dates are not always a guarantee
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