where do i go from here?

[lukeskyler]

Had a second date last night. The girl does seem interested in me. She lives 90 minutes away

 

We went to a basketball game then dinner. She took a pic of us and sent it to her mom and Her mom said "omg he is kind of cute!" she wa salso very touch feely. han in my hand, arm around my arm

 

While we were eating dinner we talked about what we look for in a relationship. I mentioned how I'm not into games and she said "I'm not leading you on. I don't want to be in a relationship with you.Its nothing about you, I just am focused on school"

 

I was shocked because it looked like she had interest in me(saying how she was excited to see me, or saying i miss you). So when we got back to my place I asked her "so what was the whole i dont want to be in a relationship with you "talk about? Are you saying you have no interest at all?

 

She said "I have 6 weeks left of school and I'm done. I have been in school for 5 years and I;m focusing on finishing. Then I'm taking time to myself. Right now I don't want anything with anyone until I finish school, so I can't really say what will happen between us but from now till school ends i dont want anything with anyone. But I will tell you I like you and am attracted to you"

 

 

So where do I go from here?

[Buddhist]

You thank her for her time, walk away and date someone else. If you are focusing on school, taking time for yourself you aren't out there dating people and leading them on. You're focusing on school and taking time for yourself.

 

Personally I think she's playing the "I'm not clingy card' with you. If people are playing, no matter their intentions then they are playing. It's a sign of emotional immaturity and doesn't bode well for any kind of relationship. They won't suddenly stop playing a game once they are in a relationship with you. The best way to deal with this immaturity is to take everything she says at face value.

 

She has just told you she has no intention of giving you a relationship. That's the point at which you stop investing your energy there, thank her for her honesty and find someone else who is looking for a relationship. Don't make the mistake of thinking this is the last woman on earth. She is far from that.

[LostOnes05]

You do nothing. Let her contact you to hang out. No point in putting forth effort when she was upfront with you, which is a good thing. Besides that if you pressure her, she'll shut down and shut you out permanently. If/when she reaches out it will be because she genuinely wants to see you. Like I said, don't put a lot of effort into her until she is the one reaching out to you.

[Methodical]

She basically told you she is busy for the next two months and then wants time to herself. Honestly, she isn't really interested. Don't waste your time.

[lukeskyler]

how am i wasting my time? i am dating other people

 

she has told me before she isnt wanting anything serious until after shes done with school

 

she said school comes first before anyone besides family

[Versacehottie]

I wouldn't say you are wasting HER time at all but don't let her waste YOURS.

 

Sounds like she wants you hanging around until the point where she is ready to decide or as mentioned above it could be reverse psychology to say she doesn't want anything so you don't think she's too clingy.

 

I guess at this point you have to take her at her word. If you are close to her age and thus young enough and it fits with your personality to go with the flow, then consider doing that. Her actions will speak louder than anything. If it doesn't meet your standard of how you see yourself dating or you are looking for something more serious and will be disappointed by what she says she has to give then you should move on.

 

Good luck.

[lukeskyler]

i think ill just keep doing what ive been doing whcih includes seeing others

[brothers343]

Thats the dating life.......you keep moving on until the right flavor comes. At least she has her priorities straight. If that is really what she's doing. Good luck.