BrokenBadly Posted April 10, 2016 Posted April 10, 2016 Last night I broke no contact after 3 weeks. (6.5 weeks since break up) It started out fine and good texting and then later on in the night asking all sorts of bad questions that lead me to start pleading and begging. And when they say it brings you right back to square one when you break it, it does. I feel as bad today as the first weekend of the brake up. I wish there was a way to erase my memory of this girl. I thought we would be together forever. Seriously feel the worst i have ever felt in my life. And now I back to day 1 all over again . It is so hard to let go of hope. Its like accepting the death of someone who is still alive. It leaves your heart and soul cracked. Glad there is support here 1
sunshine2 Posted April 10, 2016 Posted April 10, 2016 Sorry to hear you are back to step 1 again. It is so hard to leave someone that you love and the realization that you will never be together again is painful. The only cure is time and NC. Don't be hard on yourself, we all make mistakes. Now that you know how it feels, you probably won't want to do it again. Take care of yourself and try to stay busy and each day will get better I promise. 2
edel Posted April 10, 2016 Posted April 10, 2016 Delete her number. Delete her from social media. Block her. That way it will be easier. 3
Arman1987 Posted April 10, 2016 Posted April 10, 2016 Hi there! I'm very sorry to hear that u now at the bottom again. I did this to myself like 3 weeks ago (broke up 5 weeks ago [cheating], deleted everything, but read her blog... then read things i wish never see, so restart from bottom) Just to let You know, i really feel you and your pain, from fresh own "practice". Now you have a very painfull experience about how bad is it to break NC. But your heart still miss her, want to see her, speak to her, know what she doing ect... Thats normal. We all go throu this. But now you have to be the stronges yourself that ever be! To protect yourself from hurt and pain, and to be able to move forvard. I don't know the details of your breakup, but i guess that relationship is finished. Say it to yourself when you thinkig of breaking nc. Will i feel better from it? NO! Do i need more pain? NO! Do i want to make my healing lasts way more longer? NO! Protect yourself and be strong! Make your mind clear, looking back and stepping back is your enemy from now. You dont need them! Feel the pain, cry if you want, hit puncgin bag, talk about to your family, closer friends, start your long way out of it. Use all of your time, read stories here, also ask for help like now! The harder you keep yourself to these things, the faster you will heal! We are in the same shoes from the time you marked (5-6weeks). I wish you the best, and power to become happy again! 2
Author BrokenBadly Posted April 10, 2016 Author Posted April 10, 2016 Its so hard! she just replied to my text basically of me ranting about how upset i was that it was over, and asking her if there was a chance and my last text i just apologized for for sending all those messages and that i felt like a complete idiot..she simply replied "Its fine--just forget about it." To which i didn't reply and won't. It just crushes me how cold she is. I feel like I have no idea who i was with. Thanks for the advice guys! 1
Satu Posted April 10, 2016 Posted April 10, 2016 Its so hard! she just replied to my text basically of me ranting about how upset i was that it was over, and asking her if there was a chance and my last text i just apologized for for sending all those messages and that i felt like a complete idiot..she simply replied "Its fine--just forget about it." To which i didn't reply and won't. It just crushes me how cold she is. I feel like I have no idea who i was with. Thanks for the advice guys! "When all the words have been said, there are no more words to be said." *No direct contact. *No sending or receiving of messages. *Block any means she might use to contact you. *No replies to anything that gets through your blocks. *No indirect contact through third parties. *De-friend or delete from all social media. *No monitoring of her on social media. *No 'little birds' feeding you news. *Tell people that you don't want to know anything about what she is doing or saying. Take care. 1
drewbee30 Posted April 10, 2016 Posted April 10, 2016 Check out the book "Addicted" by Amir Levine & Rachel Heller. It's a really good read and relates much of what we have all gone through as the withdrawal of an addiction. Does it make the process any easier of letting go? NO! However, it does provide some good insight into the reactions going on inside of your brain after such a dramatic experience. I can sit here and tell everyone till I'm blue in the face how much the last 2 years of our 10 year relationship sucked, but my heart, brain and mind say otherwise. I'm trusting in this process and I'm accepting all the ups and downs I am feeling. I don't think I really grasped this process 12 years ago after my first breakup. Everyone told me to just move on and get over it. I think for a lot of people, they just forget about how it feels, till they are put back into that position. 2
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