TheCasual Posted April 10, 2016 Posted April 10, 2016 There is this girl I like I work with. We all went out mad Friday and had a great night. Me her and a couple of others ended up staying out until about 4am. We had two weeks off for Christmas and she virtually liked everything I posted on Facebook. Even stuff she doesn't like. Like football, betting and guitars. We came back after Christmas and she has been really really flirty with me. Poking, pulling my hair, putting things down my back, offering me a back massage and tickling me. As as well as that flirty, micky taking banter. We've been out a a few times in groups and generally been really flirty with me. About a month she had a really bad day at work, one of the lads we worked with sent her flowers saying 'even ugly girls deserve flowers', who she had rejected 5 times and we went out another lad we work with came on really strong with. Se got a bit emotional and left. She messaged me saying sorry and that I was her hero and that she loved being around me. The Thursday before Easter me and her and another lad went out. She was all over me, holding hands, cuddling and touching me and we had a kiss. Although she put she had amazing night on Friday and a few selfies of me and her on Facebook with love hearts. Since then she's been really weird with me. We moved into a new office and we are quite far away from each other. But there was/is a rumour at work I'm seeing someone. Although I've tried to defuse the rumours. I know she goes out with the lad we work with as friends who sent her flowers. I'm so confused and have no idea what to do.
road Posted April 10, 2016 Posted April 10, 2016 Do you want her to be your girlfriend then tell her.
smudge21 Posted April 10, 2016 Posted April 10, 2016 Erm, so she virtually jumps you every time she sees you and you don't make a move? Why not? Also she's "going out" with the guy that upset her? This whole story seems like a film where someone's skipped the plot points. Talk to her. Maybe she just gave up as you never took the (pretty obvious) hints and now has run back to flower boy. You may have missed that boat.
TaraMaiden2 Posted April 10, 2016 Posted April 10, 2016 "She and I..." not 'me and her'..... Don't date in the workplace. Just don't. it will all end in tears. Can you imagine the sch*tstorm if you guys are incompatible and break up? She will be as hot in her disdain as she is in her current flirting.
Author TheCasual Posted April 10, 2016 Author Posted April 10, 2016 Erm, so she virtually jumps you every time she sees you and you don't make a move? Why not? Also she's "going out" with the guy that upset her? This whole story seems like a film where someone's skipped the plot points. Talk to her. Maybe she just gave up as you never took the (pretty obvious) hints and now has run back to flower boy. You may have missed that boat. I'm just very shy with girls I guess I'm scared of rejection.
TaraMaiden2 Posted April 10, 2016 Posted April 10, 2016 She's the one giving you all the "come on over here big boy!" signals - and YOU'RE the one 'scared of rejection'...? 1
Author TheCasual Posted April 10, 2016 Author Posted April 10, 2016 She's the one giving you all the "come on over here big boy!" signals - and YOU'RE the one 'scared of rejection'...? I don't know. It all scares me. It's hard to explain. I just don't know how to go about it all.
TaraMaiden2 Posted April 10, 2016 Posted April 10, 2016 Then ask a good friend/colleague to be an intermediary.... and to explain to her that you're painfully shy and you feel awkward and unsure.... I still stand by the "don't date in the workplace" advice though.
d0nnivain Posted April 10, 2016 Posted April 10, 2016 She's being weird because she thinks you are rejecting her. Find your courage & ask her to go on an actual date with you -- just you & her, not the whole gang. 1
Author TheCasual Posted April 10, 2016 Author Posted April 10, 2016 She's being weird because she thinks you are rejecting her. Find your courage & ask her to go on an actual date with you -- just you & her, not the whole gang. I've watched a few things on Youtube. I think she's getting that feeling because I haven't been leading and dominate towards.
smackie9 Posted April 10, 2016 Posted April 10, 2016 Dude she's been all over you, and you sit there like a stump......it's no wonder she's so disappointed. At this moment she's wondering what's so wrong with her...she's making it pretty damn obvious she wants you but you still haven't made a move to ask her out. Please grow a set and ask her out for a dinner date and give her an amazing time. BTW the rumor is your fault. Everyone else is wondering what is the hell wrong with you....I bet the majority assume the reason you haven't asked her out is because you are seeing someone. 1
smudge21 Posted April 10, 2016 Posted April 10, 2016 I'm just very shy with girls I guess I'm scared of rejection. There is no rejection when a girl's already in your bed! She's made all the moves and you've done none - just suggest you take this flirting out of the office. You have to think about what is the worse that could happen... she says no? Doubtful unless she's moved onto flower boy already. Oh and do be wary of work relationships.
Author TheCasual Posted April 10, 2016 Author Posted April 10, 2016 Dude she's been all over you, and you sit there like a stump......it's no wonder she's so disappointed. At this moment she's wondering what's so wrong with her...she's making it pretty damn obvious she wants you but you still haven't made a move to ask her out. Please grow a set and ask her out for a dinner date and give her an amazing time. BTW the rumor is your fault. Everyone else is wondering what is the hell wrong with you....I bet the majority assume the reason you haven't asked her out is because you are seeing someone. There is no rejection when a girl's already in your bed! She's made all the moves and you've done none - just suggest you take this flirting out of the office. You have to think about what is the worse that could happen... she says no? Doubtful unless she's moved onto flower boy already. Oh and do be wary of work relationships. Thank you. You've both been very helpful. I know it's so obvious. It's getting chance to speak to her alone. I've really tried to defuse the rumour. I'm actually looking for another job. So hopefully that won't be a problem.
bu2002 Posted April 11, 2016 Posted April 11, 2016 There's not much more she can do to convey her interest. The ball is in your court. The reason she is being weird is because of your lack of action. Take her out - just you and her. None of the group stuff.
Versacehottie Posted April 11, 2016 Posted April 11, 2016 I'm just very shy with girls I guess I'm scared of rejection. wait, she kissed you though? how is that rejection? from what you posted here, she likes you. She may like the other guy too though. Part of reason being that she may be getting too many mixed messages and false starts from you. Or maybe it's just how she is--hard to tell from the info here so far. Good luck
Author TheCasual Posted April 11, 2016 Author Posted April 11, 2016 I didn't get chance to really speak to her today. But she twice went past me wile I was at my desk and pulled my hair and tickled my neck.
TaraMaiden2 Posted April 12, 2016 Posted April 12, 2016 So actually, you did have a chance or opportunity to at least say something.....
Author TheCasual Posted April 12, 2016 Author Posted April 12, 2016 I was on the phone to a customer both times so couldn't really respond. I've heard she's been out with that guy a couple of times in the past few weeks, there also spending most dinner times together and they're planning a weekend away. But she said on a night out nothing will happen between them.
Author TheCasual Posted April 18, 2016 Author Posted April 18, 2016 A little update. Last Thursday she kept blowing kisses at me. We had a joke about a night out because she got a few looks in a old man pub because she was wearing a low cut dress Friday I had a day off to go for a afternoon session drinking before football(soccer) with a work mate. I tagged her in picture of a of the old man pub we had been in She replied 'Never Go In The George with a low cut dress'. I replied back daftly although I'd had a drink 'Haha maybe if the girl isn't pretty with a good rack'. She also 'liked' statuses and pictures from that day. Her and the flower boy went away and he wouldn't have sex with her. Apparently she just wants to be friends with him now. She sent me a email asking how I was doing and asked how my weekend was. She also came up to me at dinner, but I just couldn't really talk properly to her. Just didn't know what to say. She was also blowing kisses at me. Just don't know what to do now :-/
smudge21 Posted April 18, 2016 Posted April 18, 2016 Maybe she just likes to have fun. Likes the attention and all that. You're not sure about this other guy and that's a definite red flag if you're after anything serious with her. You need to step the flip up though as currently she's doing everything and you're just using any excuse not to talk to her. Get off the bleedin' social media and speak to her in person. Ask her out, a proper date, at night, for a drink. If she says she can't, then ask her when (if she doesn't suggest another time). If she still pushes away, then leave it as she's clearly just loving the attention and loves teasing you. Either way, you need to deal with this asap.
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