blue16 Posted June 16, 2005 Posted June 16, 2005 Alright so there is this girl i've had my eye on for most of the semester I thought she was pretty cute. So anyways, the second last day of class I got a chance to talk with her for like 10 minutes - broke the ice a little between us. Today was the last day so I went to the library to study, and there she was with someone else in the class. I studied with them for a bit...and the other girl had to go so it was just us two. So after like 5 minutes of 'studying' we just started talking/flirting whatever we were kinda hitting it off. Things are lookin good so as we're bout to leave the library to go to class I ask her if she wants to get together sometime. She says "Sure!" and I take out my phone and ask for her number. She gives me her number and seems really excited...but then mentions "My cell phone is off a lot of the time so I apologize in advance." I say whatever that's ok. So I finish getting putting in her number and she says "Doesn't it suck how you always make friends the last day of class and never at the start?" I agreed with her and said "hey atleast it's better than nothing, right? :)" I thought things were goin really good, even when I asked her if she wanted to get together. But those last 2 things she said I'm not sure if she's trying to subtely reject me or blow me off? Am I just being insecure or is there some underlying meaning to what she's saying? Thx for your help.
crazy_grl Posted June 16, 2005 Posted June 16, 2005 Originally posted by blue16 "My cell phone is off a lot of the time so I apologize in advance." Just sounds to me like she wanted you to know that if she didn't answer her phone, she wasn't trying to blow you off. She just has her cell phone off a lot. "Doesn't it suck how you always make friends the last day of class and never at the start?" I agreed with her and said "hey atleast it's better than nothing, right? :)" The most worrisome part of this is the word "friends". It could be her way of letting you know she's not interested in anything but friends. Or it could be that she was nervous and couldn't think of anything else to say. No way to know but call her and find out.
BrotherAaron Posted June 17, 2005 Posted June 17, 2005 Dude, she wants you. She was sending all the right signals, don't be confused by her woman-speak. Us men will never understand what a girl we're trying to pursue is saying, so we're better of not trying to. You'll end up getting yourself twice as confused. The best way to find out what she really meant is to simply call her and invite her on a date. You'll figure out how much she likes you by what she does, not what she says. Oh, and don't worry that she said "friends". Once again, it's too amibvalent to mean anything to you. If she didn't make it clear, than it wasn't that important . You'll be dead in the water if you start off with the assumption that she doesn't like you - and it's a bad assumption, in this case. From what you've told me, I think she's really digging you. Go for it. She wants you to. Oh, and don't call her 100 times because she hasn't answered her phone yet. If you bombard her, she'll be running the other direction.
Author blue16 Posted June 17, 2005 Author Posted June 17, 2005 Alright thx you guys, I'll give it a shot. I almost fell into the trap of listening to her words instead of her actions, I've made that mistake before and I regretted it. But...I must be honest I'm not sure if I really want a relationship. I'm starting to realize that I really enjoy the chase and playing the field. After I asked this girl out (and we'll assume she said yes) I kinda felt like the chase was over and that was it. I'm not trying to be pessimistic but as soon as I got her number I suddenly wasn't as interested as I was when we were just getting to know each other. I guess I'll give her a call and we can go out and I'll play it by ear and see how it goes. Thx you two.
Marshbear Posted June 17, 2005 Posted June 17, 2005 Friend is a general term. When you introduce your G/F to someone else you say " this is my friend". I think she likes you . Just call her and ask to meet somewhere. If she gives you escuses then move on. Just give it a shot. But like BA says don't call to much and make a pest of yourself. Peace...
clynn Posted June 17, 2005 Posted June 17, 2005 Definitely call her. She was just prewarning you with the cell phone thing. and the "friends" I wouldn't worry about cuz it is a very good place to start with . . . friends. Originally posted by blue16 But...I must be honest I'm not sure if I really want a relationship. I'm starting to realize that I really enjoy the chase and playing the field. After I asked this girl out (and we'll assume she said yes) I kinda felt like the chase was over and that was it. I'm not trying to be pessimistic but as soon as I got her number I suddenly wasn't as interested as I was when we were just getting to know each other. Arrrggghhh!!!! M - E - N ! ! ! !!!!! ha ha ha ha
Author blue16 Posted June 23, 2005 Author Posted June 23, 2005 Update: Not lookin good, I've called her cell phone once every couple days during the last week and everytime her phone has been off and says the customer is unavailable etc. One time i did get through, after about 10 rings her brother answered and said she wasn't home but I couldn't really hear him the volume on my phone sux. I remember he did say "can I get a name...?" but it was hard to hear the rest. So basically she got the msg that "blue16" called but I'm not sure if she has my number if she has caller ID (I doubt she does). So basically either she got the msg that I called and has my number, and is blowing me off...or she knows I called but doesn't have a call back number so she can't do anything. I guess i'll try a couple more times and if her phone is still off then I'm not gonna waste anymore time.
She_Devil Posted June 23, 2005 Posted June 23, 2005 So not what I thought this thread was about...I am slightly disapointed.
Mary3 Posted June 24, 2005 Posted June 24, 2005 Its not over til its over Why dont you try contacting her other than via phone ? Can you see her in class or know where she hangs out . ? Sounds like she is interested but does not leave her phone on. I dont leave mine on at work and at nite I turn it off when I go to bed. So if that helps at all....
pretty boy Posted June 24, 2005 Posted June 24, 2005 My cell's off a lot of the time, I don't always answer back either. Granted none of the people who leave them are people I like. You said that you get a message saying the girl isn't available? So, did you ever leave a message or is the message box turned off or something. Because if your leaving messages and she's not answering back, doesn't look good. If I were you, I'd call, maybe every four days or so, and when you do get a hold of someone, find out where this girl is and when she'll be available. Hope that's help at all.
Swamp Posted June 24, 2005 Posted June 24, 2005 Blue16, Chill out man. You would almost think she wouldn't have told you that she doesn't answer her phone if she WAS trying to blow you off. Relax. Call once every 4-7 days. Also, the word "friend" is completely overrated. Friend does not mean "not boyfriend potential." Friend is very vague and very general. Can you think of any other word that could be used to describe a potential partner? I have never understood people and their fear of the "friend zone." The best relationships and marriages are built upon friendships. A good friendship is the hardest freaking part of a relationship to cultivate. Starting as friends make it easy, light weight, and genuine. Insecurity brother. Relax, work out, be busy doing other stuff, and call her once a week or so. Don't mention the fact that you have been hounding her either. At ALL TIMES speak positively, lightly and be completely quiet about your interest in her.
noname Posted June 24, 2005 Posted June 24, 2005 if you didn't leave her a message with your number, she probably doesn't have it. i don't know anybody who has a phone that records numbers or missed calls when it is off... and brothers can almost never be trusted to give messages...
Author blue16 Posted June 24, 2005 Author Posted June 24, 2005 Ok well I finally got through...asked her if she wanted to "get together sometime soon." and she kind of hesitated and said she was really busy but maybe next week...then asked if this was my number and said she would call me back later if she was available. Pffft.....ya right Obviously a rejection in my opinion, which really confuses me. It's not so much the rejection that bothers me, but the fact I was almost positive she was interested. We had a really good conversation back at school, I asked if she wanted to get together and she said yes without any hesitation. Maybe she was scared to say no in person and figured I probably wouldn't follow through. You know those times someone casually asks if you want to hang out sometime, you aren't really interested but you think they won't even follow through anyway so you say 'yes' just to be polite. Maybe that's what it was I dunno...
Swamp Posted June 24, 2005 Posted June 24, 2005 I think she WAS interested. I think you called way too many times. You freaked her out, man. I suggest you work on your phone ettiquite.
Author blue16 Posted June 24, 2005 Author Posted June 24, 2005 Hmm...well whenever I called her phone it was OFF, couldn't even get to the ringing. When someones cell phone is off the call doesn't register does it? And she doesn't have voicemail which is why i never left a message. If her phone did register my calls even when it was off...then oops I guess I made a mistake lol. If she wasn't getting any of my calls...then when I finally talk to her she makes up excuses, she wasn't really interested in the first place.
fundamental Posted June 24, 2005 Posted June 24, 2005 Blue, Can you imagine a coach of a football team saying, "Guys, we are down by 3 points in the FIRST quarter, I think we are going to lose?" You sound just like the coach. It seems like your setting yourself up for the rejection without giving yourself a chance. Don't do this so early in the game. GIVE YOURSELF A CHANCE!!! In this situation, I feel you are over-analyzing the girl. Relax a bit. Plan some other activities so that you won't be consume with her and being rejected. Believe in yourself and if she doesn't like or you never get in touch with her, who cares? Perhaps, she will give you a call. From reading your post, it sounds like she is interested.
Mary3 Posted June 25, 2005 Posted June 25, 2005 Blue she either : A ) Was just being nice when you first asked her out in person and didnt really want to go out B) She doesnt sound like she is that interested honestly but I could be wrong. If she DOES give you a call in the next 5 days and says she would like to go out , then thats good. If you dont hear back from her at all , well maybe she wasnt that interested. Do you recall how many times you called ? Because it will show missed calls. If she sees a string of those, it kinda freaks a girl out. But to be considerate she should be calling you back ... Did you call alot. ? Whether or not she answered , her phone logs the calls as missed calls. I hope you find a nice girl to go out with because you sound like a keeper !
westernxer Posted June 25, 2005 Posted June 25, 2005 Originally posted by blue16 If she wasn't getting any of my calls...then when I finally talk to her she makes up excuses, she wasn't really interested in the first place. Well, at least now you know.
Author blue16 Posted June 25, 2005 Author Posted June 25, 2005 Originally posted by fundamental Blue, Can you imagine a coach of a football team saying, "Guys, we are down by 3 points in the FIRST quarter, I think we are going to lose?" You sound just like the coach. It seems like your setting yourself up for the rejection without giving yourself a chance. Don't do this so early in the game. GIVE YOURSELF A CHANCE!!! In this situation, I feel you are over-analyzing the girl. Relax a bit. Plan some other activities so that you won't be consume with her and being rejected. Believe in yourself and if she doesn't like or you never get in touch with her, who cares? Perhaps, she will give you a call. From reading your post, it sounds like she is interested. Ya I'm not being very optomistic am I? lol. I am not obsessed with her tho, she is cool and everything but if she isn't interested I'm not gonna lose sleep over it. You're right maybe I should plan more activities, although I have work and try to hang out with my friends now and then I need something else to do. Like today I didn't have work until tonight...so I was bored during the day. I didn't really have anything better to do so I decided to give her a call and that's when she answered. When I'm busy doing other things and out with friends I really couldn't care less about her. I won't be expecting a call, but if she does then I'll give it a shot...why not Originally posted by Mary3 Blue she either : A ) Was just being nice when you first asked her out in person and didnt really want to go out B) She doesnt sound like she is that interested honestly but I could be wrong. If she DOES give you a call in the next 5 days and says she would like to go out , then thats good. If you dont hear back from her at all , well maybe she wasnt that interested. Do you recall how many times you called ? Because it will show missed calls. If she sees a string of those, it kinda freaks a girl out. But to be considerate she should be calling you back ... Did you call alot. ? Whether or not she answered , her phone logs the calls as missed calls. I hope you find a nice girl to go out with because you sound like a keeper ! The only thing I can think of is that she was being nice when she said yes. Maybe I'm sensitive to the word 'busy'...but when someone just says they are 'really busy' that's one of the most commonly used excuses in the world. Her phone was off, so it didn't log the calls. I tried it with a friend actually, got her to turn off her phone and I called her and her ID didn't show any missed calls. I called a couple times every few days...so maybe like 6-7 times altogether? If I was calling and the phone was ringing then obviously I wouldn't continue to phone her...but I couldn't even get through so I decided to keep trying until her phone atleast rang, lol. I knew the calls weren't being logged...so I figured i could just bombard her and it was all good But ya your right....if she were to see a big bunch of missed calls from me then I could understand if she was freaked out. If she isn't interested I don't think she'll be calling back out of courtesy. Originally posted by westernxer Well, at least now you know. Yup...it's all up to her now. I'm assuming she isn't gonna call, so I should just move on and not worry and if she does or not.
Author blue16 Posted June 27, 2005 Author Posted June 27, 2005 lol today was hilarious...I work inside a mall so I went to the food fare for my break. I was just finishing my meal, and I look up and she is standing about 25 feet in front of me with a friend looking for a place to sit! What a wierd coincidence! So I thought to myself "ah so these are her busy plans....strolling through the mall on a Sunday." Just as I had thought...she made the whole thing up. I just looked away and finished my food, then walked up and left. I dunno if she saw me or not, doesn't really matter at this point though.
Mary3 Posted June 27, 2005 Posted June 27, 2005 Shes not only blind but she stoooopid too ! lol. Dang you can do better anyway You Rock !
Recommended Posts