loveiswar101 Posted April 2, 2016 Posted April 2, 2016 After a small amount of time with a woman I got to like and invested in, I struggle to stay no contact. She texts every few days and I can't help myself and reply. She insist in staying friend for her and her girls and ask me why I can't. I like her alot and have told her friends won't work, im looking for more. She say she is so sad and unhappy now. Yet keep persisting with friends only. I'm so weak. This happened with my last girlfriend of 3 years. I was weak for months and replying, but then finally I moved on and don't think of her at all. I've been crying every night wanting more from this woman, but have stood my ground with the no friends but she lures me back in. We text a few messages then she straight into I can only offer friends. Argh. 1
basil67 Posted April 2, 2016 Posted April 2, 2016 Keep trying. Failing a couple of times doesn't mean that you will always fail in the future. Remind yourself it's her fault that she's sad - you'd be in her life if you were her boyfriend. She has the ability to make it so, but chooses not to. Hmmm....have you bluntly told her this? 2
Author loveiswar101 Posted April 2, 2016 Author Posted April 2, 2016 Hmmm....have you bluntly told her this? I have.... she say's she want to hang out but can't commit, want to be friends, and I persist with all or nothing.Last night she got her girls to phone me and thank me for presents I gave them. A text would of done. It make me feel she is reaching out, but as soon as we chat a little longer she says just friends, gets ****ty when I won't agree. Anyhow, out blue she just sent me a massive text how she can't cope with life, everything is getting n top of her and that I insist on her wanting her to love me. I don't want her to love me I just want us to hangout and see what happens. I don't know how to word that without it coming out all or nothing that she thinks. I've told her Ill leave her be from here in. I just need to be strong and not reply to texts here in. I only have myself to blame for all this, when someone shows me interest I over invest. I guess i'm just lonely. 1
Frank13 Posted April 3, 2016 Posted April 3, 2016 She is being selfish. If she cared about you at all she would leave you alone so you could get over her and move on. She just wants the attention, an ego stroke, and someone to hang out with until she finds Mr. Right. Do you want massive texts about how she is having problems with her future boyfriend? I love how girls in this situation are sad and unhappy. I would take sadness and unhappiness over losing someone because they cared about me and I didn't care back, than hurt and rejection from losing someone I cared about who didn't care back. 1
fireflywy Posted April 3, 2016 Posted April 3, 2016 Wait a minute. Hold on. How long have you been hanging out with thisnperson? Were you clearly dating? Intimate? Did she open up being more from the get go and THEN pull back or was she always in the friendship vein? Need more info to see if you're responding to this correctly. 1
Author loveiswar101 Posted April 3, 2016 Author Posted April 3, 2016 We went on a few dates, started to get to know each other, she introduced me to her kids. I was around the place each weekend, we got intimate, had sex (to which she told me she enjoyed, so did I). Single mom, three kids, lot going on. I get it, understand how exhausting it is! Known her since November, End of Feb she started pulling back, then insist on friends. Even though I like her alot and her girls, but ive really had enough, I've always been kind, polite loving, warm and won't change me because of her wants, needs. I be polite as brought up and just fade away I think. She get bored and understand I think. 1
carnelian Posted April 4, 2016 Posted April 4, 2016 Did she say exactly why she wanted to be friends? There is something she is not telling you. I have heard this before myself from girls. How did you get along with her kids? Often the way to a woman's heart is through connecting with her kids. Or maybe she is hiding from you something she doesn't like? Something sexual? Encourage her to be more honest with you and clear the air. Truth or Dare? 1
Satu Posted April 4, 2016 Posted April 4, 2016 You have to block her if you want this to stop. *No direct contact. *No sending or receiving of messages. *Block any means she might use to contact you. *No replies to anything that gets through your blocks. *No indirect contact through third parties. *De-friend or delete from all social media. *No monitoring of her on social media. *No 'little birds' feeding you news. *Tell people that you don't want to know anything about what she is doing or saying. Take care.
Author loveiswar101 Posted April 5, 2016 Author Posted April 5, 2016 Thanks Satu With great sadness I have done as you recommend, I know it's the right thing to do. With phone blocked, I just need to focus on me, been down this path before. It's a hard road even harder as not only really liking the woman but got attached to her kids to. But it's all for the best. Here we go again, need to be tough as ever!
Recommended Posts