Brknbtstrng73 Posted March 29, 2016 Posted March 29, 2016 So I wanted to get some advice on a guy I am dating that doesn't have much time. Been dating for almost 3 months FYI. A little history about him, he's 26 yrs old, he works for a mental hospital and he works the night shift from 4pm to 12am. He is a security guard so he works different locations of the hospital as needed. When he gets home he's not too tired so doesn't go straight to bed. ( BTW he works Monday through Friday). He, from what he tells me gets up anywhere between 11:00am and 1:00pm, gets ready at 2:00pm for work ( I know its a little weird I know his schedule). Me, I work Tuesday through Saturday. Hours between 9:00am to 6:00pm or 10:00am to 7:00pm. Also I work for a dealership, and in my department overtime is asked of us every month because we are short staffed, so I typically work more then 40 hours a week. Now the thing is, I don't get to see him often. I see him once a week either on Saturday after work or Sunday. I do not get to talk to him often over the phone and if I do, it is literally a 2 to 4 minute conversation. I do not complain about him hanging out with his friends because it would be wrong of me to restrict from him just cause we do not see each other. I do not require a lot to hold a relationship but there is one thing that must happen; Communication What has me a confused and upset is how he can snap chat or facebook but not respond to my text messages. Say for example I text him at 11am, I go on fb and I see can on the chat side what people have been on and what time there were on there. It will show him on there maybe 10 mins ago and I texted him 30 minutes ago. With snapchat, you can only snap through your phone, so I will see a posting from him but no response back to the text I sent. I have confronted him more then 4 times about this issue and his response is " I don't have a lot of time". He throws a bunch of excuses at me like," I didn't check my phone or I didn't see your message". I have told him that I think its best to be friends instead of dating each other, but he is begging me to give him another chance. I would really like some advice because I feel and maybe I am being too harsh, that this will never change with him especially because I have expressed to him many times how it makes me to feel. Should I be patient with him and give it a chance or just be friends? 1
Satu Posted March 29, 2016 Posted March 29, 2016 Say hello to 'Mr Unavailable' for me. I used to know him well. Then google Natalie Lue. Take care. 5
xpaperxcutx Posted March 29, 2016 Posted March 29, 2016 He's not that into you. He's keeping you on the burner cause he knows you like him. Basically everything you wrote about his behavior has already said enough. You're not a priority and he has more time for snapchat than to reply to your texts. Stop making excuses, and do not offer to be his friend. He already knows what kind of behavior you're willing to put up from him. Stop thinking he is the only guy who can give you what you want. I swear, I was dating a guy who was "too busy" for me but he was posting on Facebook and also going out to dinner with his friends. Now I am dating a guy who works fulltime but still finds time to text me when he is at work. If you have to wonder about a guy's behavior, you know he's just trying to bull-**** you. DO NOT PUT UP WITH BS. 2
LAtoChiGuy Posted March 29, 2016 Posted March 29, 2016 He's not that into you. Guy here, yup. When we are into someone we make an effort. The whole wait 2 to 3 days thing is bull. Real men want to see the someone that gets them feeling good and the only way to set up dates is to gasp contact you. 3
ly399 Posted March 30, 2016 Posted March 30, 2016 excuses, don't fall for it. I have been on both end of things. busy=I might be working or sitting around browsing garbage online, but I really don't want to be around you. I dated busy men all my life doc, engineer, ibanker, lawyer, etc. they'll make time for you, skip meetings, change other plans etc if they want to see you, and flip on "busy" sign when they are done with you. such is life. don't feel bad just move on. more men out there want to give you attention. 1
TaraMaiden2 Posted March 30, 2016 Posted March 30, 2016 Guy I'm dating actually has plenty of time, just not for me. Is how the title should read. 2
Emilia Posted March 30, 2016 Posted March 30, 2016 You ask once or twice then you move on. You don't 'confront' he doesn't owe you anything and clearly he isn't interested. I'm sure he could work daytime if he wanted to 1
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