jackmolineux Posted March 28, 2016 Posted March 28, 2016 I was texting the guy I'm dating last night, we've been on five dates. Last date was very very romantic with each other and couldn't help ourselves but snog eachother all the time. I thought that we were getting serious, told all our friends etc All was going well, we'd send kiss emoji, call each other babe etc. Then all of a sudden he just stopped, and last night we were talking and he said that "Well I like you, but I don't really feel anything beyond that tbh" He kept saying how he can't see himself having a serious relationship until after uni but can see himself having a less serious one along the way. Also saying how work needs to Come first and feelings after. He has exams in less than a month. He's super stressed out about them. The conversation was normal and he was saying how he told his mum about me the other day and how maybe I should tell mine. Then boom at 1amish the texting turns to his feelings "And it's not that I don't like youBecause I do But I dunno Maybe I'm just incapable of liking people" Please please help me. I don't know what to do? What are your thoughts I've literatelly been up all night thinking about this, I felt sick to the bottom of my stomach and wanted to cry. He said we need to talk about it today.
ExpatInItaly Posted March 28, 2016 Posted March 28, 2016 (edited) Let him go. If it's only been 5 dates and he's already bailing, I don't see any point in sticking around. He's made it clear it won't develop into anything more. Also, the fact that he flip-flopped so quickly is a bad sign. And after just five dates, I don't feel it's long enough to meet the parents anyway. I doubt it's related to you personally. Has he recently gotten out of a relationship? Do you know if he's seeing other girls? How did you meet him? You mentioned you told "all our friends' - do you have mutual friends? He might have felt things were moving too fast if your friends were hearing it was getting serious already. From my point of view, 5 dates isn't enough to know if it's getting serious yet. Edited March 28, 2016 by ExpatInItaly 2
soph-walker Posted March 28, 2016 Posted March 28, 2016 He sounds like a f*ckboy and I'm sorry you've experienced this. At least he's showed his true colours now and not 6 months down the line when you've fallen for him well and truly. He's done you a favour, next! 1
Cherryz Posted March 28, 2016 Posted March 28, 2016 Whatever someone do or say, you need to at all times use your own brains. In the sense of take your time and look at the situation and evaluate if its realistic or rigth and so on. Its good that he wants to finish his school first. Because having gf/bf you can do that even when you 80 years old. We dont know him and how everything went down. But it sound a bit that he wants more but choose for what is rigth for him at that moment. Or his mom had a talk with him about finishing school. Either way, you can tell him your feelings and view, but dont try to force him into liking your or continue with this. Choose for yourself. And move on. Maybe on a certain point you can just be friends. It may hurt, but appreciate that you know it now and not after wasting much more time. And maybe next time dont give to much while dating, or already making it big when you tell family and freinds that you dating. And leave the psychical things as much as possible. Because they can confuse you and make you fall faster then needed for someone. Focus more on getting to know the person. And see where its going.
sickoflove11 Posted March 28, 2016 Posted March 28, 2016 This guy sounds almost exactly like the guy I'm getting over at the moment. Which is a total f*ckboy and not worth your time. My guy also called me babe and sent me kissing faces, cute videos over social media, told me I was the only one he was seeing, texted me for 2 months straight. He said he's too busy with school and work also, and I was ok with that. Even if it's true, I think it's a cop out. Especially if they see other people before you or soon after. My guy took me on a few dates and then started to diminish contact. I took the hint but ultimately made it worse later on. That's a whole other story. He is probably losing interest and doesn't want to lead you on anymore but can't just say it. Or he just got what he wanted out of it and is done. Sorry that sounds harsh but that's all the feedback I've gotten. I would say help yourself and start moving on. Easier said than done because I'm still struggling, but one day at a time it'll get better. I can only hope.
sandylee1 Posted March 28, 2016 Posted March 28, 2016 He's only after a casual thing and he's made that clear. Why should you tell your mum about him. Either be happy with his non serious thing ... or end it.... otherwise you'll end up being heartbroken.
LostOnes05 Posted March 28, 2016 Posted March 28, 2016 Unless you like sitting on fences, which I'd say could bring about several health concerns...you should let him go sort himself out. Sounds like he wants to keep you on the hook and have his own space to do as he pleases.
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