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1st date issues


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Posted

Long story short. I am a full time college student, I work full time and I do volunteer work. I dont have time for dating so I use a dating app. I met this guy and we've been talking for about a week.

Last night we went out, and I had a great time but there were some speed bumps.

1) he got drunk, I mean we had a 67 dollar check at the steakhouse and 36 of it were his drinks. Then on the way back to his house, he asked me to stop by the gas station. I was driving and he bought beer

2) we were sitting in my car talking when his phone started ringing. He ignored it, it rang again, he ignored it, it rang again. Finally I asked him and he said it was his ex. She called 8 times before I told him he could answer it if he had to. He said shes a single mom, who doesn't work and he has loaned her money before to help the child.

3) he was texting throughout dinner

4) we met at his parents house not his

5) he's got 3 facebook and 2 mention his ex, he said they broke up a year ago, but the most recent post said: "cicis with my love" and had her tagged. That was just last month.

 

I had a great time, but I'm 23 years old, 6 ft tall and very mature. I don't have time for drama and games.

HE wants to see me again tonight, should I pursue this?

 

By the way, he didn't ask for nudes or sex. This made me happy

  • Like 1
Posted
Long story short. I am a full time college student, I work full time and I do volunteer work. I dont have time for dating so I use a dating app. I met this guy and we've been talking for about a week.

Last night we went out, and I had a great time but there were some speed bumps.

1) he got drunk, I mean we had a 67 dollar check at the steakhouse and 36 of it were his drinks. Then on the way back to his house, he asked me to stop by the gas station. I was driving and he bought beer

2) we were sitting in my car talking when his phone started ringing. He ignored it, it rang again, he ignored it, it rang again. Finally I asked him and he said it was his ex. She called 8 times before I told him he could answer it if he had to. He said shes a single mom, who doesn't work and he has loaned her money before to help the child.

3) he was texting throughout dinner

4) we met at his parents house not his

5) he's got 3 facebook and 2 mention his ex, he said they broke up a year ago, but the most recent post said: "cicis with my love" and had her tagged. That was just last month.

 

I had a great time, but I'm 23 years old, 6 ft tall and very mature. I don't have time for drama and games.

HE wants to see me again tonight, should I pursue this?

 

By the way, he didn't ask for nudes or sex. This made me happy

 

Kick him to the curb! He is disrespectful by texting during dinner and not paying attention to you. And, he has ex drama, done deal for me.

 

As a single guy with no kids, drama or problems, its hard enough to get a date, much less to act like that.

  • Like 2
Posted

He's got problems.

 

So will you if you get involved with him.

  • Like 2
Posted

He sounds like an alcoholic, lives with his mom and has a baby momma. At 23 you can do better than him. Why is his baby momma asking him to lend her money? Doesn't he pay child support. This guy has way, way too much baggage for a 23 year old.

  • Like 1
Posted

Folks please don’t get me wrong, lots of interesting stuff from time to time and reaching out is always a good thing to do to get perspective but does anybody bother to read, process and comprehend the stuff that is already here?

 

So I read threads like this and like many the first thing that stands lot to me is…

 

I had a great time…

 

Now if it stopped there we would all be like awesome! BUT

 

6 ft tall and very mature. I don't have time for drama and games.

 

What does someone’s height have to do with this scenario? Mature, no time for drama and games, ok but then there is….

 

RF #1

 

he got drunk, I mean we had a 67 dollar check at the steakhouse and 36 of it were his drinks.

 

RF#2

 

he asked me to stop by the gas station. I was driving and he bought beer

 

You drove, dude got drunk, and purchased more beer….

 

RF#3

 

we were sitting in my car talking when his phone started ringing. He ignored it, it rang again, he ignored it, it rang again. Finally I asked him and he said it was his ex. She called 8 times before I told him he could answer it if he had to. He said shes a single mom, who doesn't work and he has loaned her money before to help the child.

 

Remember you said…

 

I don't have time for drama and games.

 

RF#4

 

he was texting throughout dinner

 

So dude is rude and inconsiderate

 

But you said...

 

I don't have time for drama and games.

 

he's got 3 facebook and 2 mention his ex, he said they broke up a year ago, but the most recent post said: "cicis with my love" and had her tagged. That was just last month.

 

But you said...

 

I don't have time for drama and games.

 

HE wants to see me again tonight, should I pursue this?

 

But you said…

 

I don't have time for drama and games.

 

Am I missing something? If I am someone please clue me in…

And the thing is someone will start another similar thread where a dude is rude, a drunk, still in drama with ex, a bum, did I mention a drunk? AND APPRARENTLY DOES NOT EVEN HAVE A CAR! WTF!? And they will again ask...

should I pursue this?

 

ok...

  • Like 2
  • Author
Posted

Actually he's got a car, the kid isn't his (he's older than they've even known each other)

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted
Folks please don’t get me wrong, lots of interesting stuff from time to time and reaching out is always a good thing to do to get perspective but does anybody bother to read, process and comprehend the stuff that is already here?

 

So I read threads like this and like many the first thing that stands lot to me is…

 

 

 

Now if it stopped there we would all be like awesome! BUT

 

 

 

What does someone’s height have to do with this scenario? Mature, no time for drama and games, ok but then there is….

 

RF #1

 

 

 

RF#2

 

 

 

You drove, dude got drunk, and purchased more beer….

 

RF#3

 

 

 

Remember you said…

 

 

 

RF#4

 

he was texting throughout dinner

 

So dude is rude and inconsiderate

 

But you said...

 

 

 

 

 

But you said...

 

 

 

 

 

But you said…

 

 

 

Am I missing something? If I am someone please clue me in…

And the thing is someone will start another similar thread where a dude is rude, a drunk, still in drama with ex, a bum, did I mention a drunk? AND APPRARENTLY DOES NOT EVEN HAVE A CAR! WTF!? And they will again ask...

should I pursue this?

 

ok...

 

When you're a six foot tall woman living in Texas, you've got 2 options: 1) be a hoe or 2) just be single. Guys don't like tall girls, at all where I live. Even guys that are over 6 foot want girls under 5 foot 7.

 

The kid isn't his

 

He has a car, but it broke down yesterday

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted
If all it takes to recover from what should have been an awful first date is a guy not asking for nudie pics or sex, you have set the bar pretty flippin low.

 

Too many red flags to count. I'm surprised this is even being discussed.

 

When the onot reason guys want to talk to you is because they think you're easy, and then send them home very disappointed, you tend to set the bar kinda low. I just want someone who doesn't expect sex everyday or someone who doesn't want nudie pics, I'm self-conscience enough without having to show it through pictures.

Posted
When the onot reason guys want to talk to you is because they think you're easy, and then send them home very disappointed, you tend to set the bar kinda low. I just want someone who doesn't expect sex everyday or someone who doesn't want nudie pics, I'm self-conscience enough without having to show it through pictures.

 

Do you really want to be the girl who sets those standards for herself with the guys she goes out with? I mean cmon... "Just want someone who doesn't treat me like a hoe or want nude pics". That's your checklist for a quality guy?

 

You went out with an older guy who has baby mama drama or ex drama at the very least, who showed no class or maturity by texting and having his phone out during a first date, drank more alchohol than a frat guy would at a party, made you drive and pick him up...... And you say you had a great time?

 

A great time is having a guy 23-29 offer to come pick you up and take you out. He doesn't take his phone out because he's right where he wants to be with the person he's set aside this time for. He doesn't bring up ex's or anything that doesn't have to do with you and him getting to know one another/flirting. He doesn't have more than 2 drinks because 1. He's driving and 2. That's an alarming thing to reveal on a first date.

 

Expect more for yourself. You clearly have low self confidence and image issues that you can work on. Trust me, being 6 ft tall doesn't make you anything less desireable. Most girls want to date guys over 6' tall in the first place. So if you're gonna be going out with guys 6' + tall, then what's the problem? You could say. "Yea I'm tall, have great long legs and a slim figure". Instead of making it out to be a negative.

 

Don't go out with this guy again. If you start seeing guys like him who don't treat you or act maturely then you'll start seeing that as normal and lower your expectations in men.

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