Miss him

[Monis]

My relationship of almost 2 years ended just recently. He broke up with me, we had been bickering on and off since the start of the new year and during this time he quit his job and his grandmother (who I had met and loved) passed away, I went to the funeral. Also my mom had to have surgery so I needed to take care of her.

 

Before all this had happened we were great. He told me he had fallen in love with me after our sixth date but didn't want to say anything; though he did finally tell me he loved me after six months together at his friends wedding. He took me to out of town weddings and vacations. He introduced me to all his friends and family, his parents loved me and I loved them, his mom told him recently "If I knew that was the last time I was going to see (my name), I would've said goodbye." I was a bit apprehensive for him to meet my mom but eventally he did, and she loved him.

 

He was just a really good down to earth guy. We spent thanksgiving and christmas with his family. He did want to be with me and even mentioned things about moving in together. Also when the topic of the future came up, asked how many children I wanted...I thought we would eventually end up together. Now I'm just left confused becuase I don't know what happend, he now wonders whether he'll even want to have children (he has close relatives with mental illness, including his uncle and his brother), and doesn't know if he'll have the patient with them. There was no cheating involved, we were fully commited to the relationship.

 

Since the breakup we met twice, once to oficially breakup face to face and the other to return each others belongings. He has told me he loves but has decided I need to move on. He looking for job right now and wants to focus on himself, I suppose. But he still has our image as his instagram profile, which confuses me and continues to "like" my photos (I have a instagram account for my dog so its public). I don't know whether we will get back together or not but I've forced myself to be productive and sign up for online dating site and focus on myself, even though its hard.

 

Any thoughts would be apprecaited. Thank you.

[Steven1]

As hard as it is, actually it sounds like the both of you have been pretty mature over it and have both done quite well advice wise. He's told you to move on and I suppose if anything at least you know where you stand with that, and if he's focusing on getting a job and needing some time for himself then again even though it's still a horrible situation, I think it's fair on both of you at least knowing what the other is doing or the reasons as to why it didn't work.

 

I think signing up to a dating quickly after a break up (this is just my personal opinion!! ) is not always a great thing, you shouldn't have to 'force' yourself into it, as there are better ways after a break up to be productive, and I've always thought that after a relationship after a year or so at least it can be better to hang back a bit with yourself to get a clearer and better perspective of what you want and where you want to be. By all means if you are comfortable with signing up to a dating website and are ready to meet new people then credit to you.

 

As for the profile pic, It's been about 2 months since my 7 year relationship ended, and I still have a few pictures of our time together on my phone etc that for now I'm not quite ready to take off my phone. They are photos I will always keep, and it may be the same for him.

[Satu]

Much too soon to date, and unfair to anyone you might date.

[helo23]

I know the feeling.. if i could give you an advice that i wished someone would have given to me is to disapear from his life.. if you see him ,moving on is gonna be the hardest...