loveiswar101 Posted March 25, 2016 Posted March 25, 2016 (edited) Time does help, it does heal. Well at the moment I think so. Two different scenario catch ups. Think Im learning more about me and more about people I invest in. Scenario 1 - 1 year ago I split from a lady I'd been together with for 3 years. I was in a bad way soon after, begging, needy all the bad moves. Finally I stopped chasing about 6 months after the initial break up. Anyhow just after xmas she text asking how I was. Few texts and nothing more. Ending with us catching up going movies. We had fun, movies coffee and nothing more good chat. It was a revelation, I looked at her and had no feelings, I mean no sexual lustful wanting feelings, all this after being together for 3 years. I honestly believe that the time apart NC for 4-5 months was the best thing. I had reached acceptance. Scenerio 2. - This might have helped with Scenario 1 but before xmas I got involved with a single mom with 3 great young kids. We got on great and I got on with her girls well. Hung out a fair bit, sex once, she was gorgeous looking. Roll on 4 months and boom she ghosts me, starts drifting and hear nothing from her for 3 weeks, then texts me, telling me she met someone else and connected. Roll on a week later ie Wednesday this week, I get a random text. I should of NC but returned the text, anyhow mr connection didn't work out. ONLY one week later. LOL. Anyhow I tell her basically she's been a dick to me, she say's she misses me! What! I like a fool say I've been missing her, holding her and kissing her etc. Returns text of I can only offer friends, can't kiss etc but you are a great kisser and very loving WTF! Roll on she ask if I want to catch up, we caught up last night. Get there, have dinner, hang out with her girls and a good evening. But as I was there I looked at her and I don't know if it was I hadn't seen here for close to a month or what but I just thought yes she is beautiful but she just not that into me at all and wants to be friends. Even though while there she flirts a bit etc. Ie has huge couch, I sit one end expecting her sit far away as massive couch but she comes in real close, she stretches right in front of me, tells me I smell nice. LOL. Anyhow I leave, come home write a for and against list..FOR.. I fine two things, AGAINST I can't stop writing. I'll be honest, I'm not 100% over her by no means, I like her she can be fun but I realize we are not for each other. The only real downer is her girls, they are so much fun and we bond well. I feel for them! I was a fool for catching up and will get flamed I know, but in one way I feel so much better for it, relieved in away seeing that she does not want me! Anyhow the story here I'm try to say is I think time apart helps with the coping and transition. Keep busy. Date others. I've realized to that I get way to invested when a girl shows interest in me and need to slow the whole **** down if and when I meet someone, look for the red flags and see if those red flags are deal breakers. Time heals (scenario 1) or at best helps (scenario 2) people! Yep. Still need to deal with second scenario but I believe I'll get there. Edited March 25, 2016 by loveiswar101 2
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