Found fiance's ex girlfriends email address written on a piece of paper!

[ambiance214]

Le me start off by saying this ex of his has been my friend since I met him. I met him through her. They went out for 6 months and me and my fiance have been together for 7 years now just got engaged in December. Well anyways I found her email address written on a ripped tiny piece of paper and it was rolled up and mixed in with other stuff. I confronted him about it and he said he never emailed her. I asked him why he had it "he says " I DON'T KNOW. He says he never planned on emailing her. Now me and her had a big falling out because of him years ago and just have recently started talking. Why does he have this? I don't trust him but Im so much in love with him. He has cheated on me before and I took him back now I feel like its just not worth it anymore. Why would you have someones email address writte and hidden away if you didn't plan on emailing them???? Especially and ex girlfriend, come on now! Any advice?

[westernxer]

You shouldn't marry him if you don't trust him.

[LucreziaBorgia]

Why would you have someones email address writte and hidden away if you didn't plan on emailing them????

 

Plenty of people I know have said "hey, why don't you email me sometime" and given me their email address. That doesn't mean I intend to email them. Are you sure that you boyfriend didn't just have it with no real intention of using it?

 

Seriously though, if you can't trust him - there's really no point in marrying him unless you two learn to work out your trust issues. Working out trust issues doesn't get done well through anger and confrontation though. You'll have to find a less confrontational approach showing that you are willing to learn to trust him. Then he'll have to do his part to help you with that.

 

You said that you met him through her. Were you the reason the relationship ended? That might be the source of some of your trust issues if that's the case. Once the OW takes the place of the primary GF or wife, there's bound to always be some worries about who is going to take the OW place.

 

If you are friends with this girl, why not just ask her about it? It can't hurt to get her side of the story.

[ambiance214]

They were broken up before we started going out. Also he got her email address from an email joke I forwarded to him. He copied it from that email I sent him!

[J dub]

Ouch - so he wasnt exactly digging for her email address but he still took the time to look for it...

[LucreziaBorgia]

I still think you should talk to this girl since you are friends. If for no other reason, than to let her know that your boyfriend has her email address. If there is something going on, you will have let her know that you aware.

 

I'm curious to see what her reaction would be.

 

Just don't go jumping on her under the assumption that she is after your man. She may well not even know that your boyfriend has her email address, much less plans to use it.

[UltimateZen]

Originally posted by ambiance214

They were broken up before we started going out. Also he got her email address from an email joke I forwarded to him. He copied it from that email I sent him!

 

He is wanting to call her. And the only reasons to get in contact with an ex is to 1) Get closure. 2) Get back together for monkey sex.

 

Plus there is no trust here. I agree with westernxer, don't marry him.

[ambiance214]

I am positive that she has no clue. She is in a long term relationship and has a child. But that isn't really the point. The point is I can't believe he did that and Iam very pissed off! I don't really have much to say to him right now.

[billybadass36]

Hold on. All you have is a piece of paper with an email address on it. I email my exes from time to time to get wedding ideas and such...exchanging photos, etc. He might be doing the "how ya doin'...lookit me....I'm doing better than you...nyah, nyah, nyah" game like I do with my exes.

[FolderWife]

Honey, who knows what was going through his head when he wrote that down. That is not enough evidence to convict him of...well...anything!

 

Listen to my silly story. My husband and I went to the grocery store. He ran into a cousin of his that he hadn't seen in YEARS. They chatted it up for a while, and then she told him to call her some time, and wrote down her name and phone number on a little peice of paper.

 

He stuck it in his wallet.

 

Months and Months later, I got into his wallet to get some cash, and I saw a little slip of paper. I took it out, and it had a woman's name and phone number on it.

 

I FLIPPED OUT!!!

 

But then I calmed down...my husband works out of town...this was a local phone number...so if he had a side peice, it would most likely be a long distance number, because any time he's in town, he's at home with me. He never leaves the house for anything.

 

So I let it go, and didn't mention it. The next day, it hit me like a ton of bricks...DUH! I was right there when his cousin wrote her name and phone number down and gave it to him

 

He forgot all about it...he has no intention of calling her up

 

So, maybe you and your boyfriend had a fight. Maybe you said something in anger...like, "If you can do better, then why don't you just leave!" or something like that. He opened an old email from you, and found his ex's email address. He thought that he might mess with your head for running your mouth off, and he wrote down her email address to email his ex.

 

But later, you made up, and he forgot all about it.

 

If you found panties under his bed, or a condom in his truck (and you're allergic to condoms) THEN I'D BE WORRIED!!!

 

But you found a friend's email address written on a peice of paper...

 

Did you ever think that maybe he's planning a suprise party for you, and he wrote her email address down so he can invite her!?

 

Chiiiiiiiiiiiiiill

[SueBee3490]

Originally posted by ambiance214

I don't trust him but Im so much in love with him. He has cheated on me before and I took him back now I feel like its just not worth it anymore.

 

He's already cheated on you before and now this? Also you say he took her email off of a forwarded email you sent to him? Why is he writing her email address off of one you sent to him? If she had handed him the address and he was carrying that around with no real intentions of emailing her, I think I would give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe in that case, she handed it to him and he was being nice so he took it so to not make a big deal of it. But for him to actually write it down from an email you sent him - that doesn't look good.

 

Just keep your eyes open.

 

SueBee

[J dub]

could he be testing you to see if you are going thru his stuff?

[crazy_grl]

Originally posted by ambiance214

They were broken up before we started going out. Also he got her email address from an email joke I forwarded to him. He copied it from that email I sent him!

 

How do you know that? There's no way for you to know if someone takes an email address from something you forward them. Did he tell you or did you see him do it? Is her email address in his address book?

 

This seems like something really minor, but if you can't trust him and are always going to question things and can't believe him, then there's no reason to stay in the relationship.