NinjaX Posted March 24, 2016 Posted March 24, 2016 I met a Chinese woman from OKCupid on Tuesday night for first meet up over a drink. It turned into a 3 hour conversation where she did most of the talking before I ended it. While there were plenty of laughters and smiles with nonstop flowing conversation, after we exited the place, she sort of just said good bye and walked away presenting no position for me to go for a kiss or even a hug. I waited a day and sent her a follow up text saying I had a good time, and I would be glad to plan something fun with her again later. No response to that. My gut feeling tells me it's over and part of me thinks it's best to just forget about asking her out anyways. Thoughts? 1
smudge21 Posted March 24, 2016 Posted March 24, 2016 Your call on this one - walk away or hit her with one more text/phone call. If you feel it's worth trying one more time then do so. Have you got anything to lose? I wouldn't go beyond that though if you hear nothing back. 1
Larryville Posted March 24, 2016 Posted March 24, 2016 I met a Chinese woman… Just curious is the fact that she is Chinese matter? Is her ethnicity something new for you? 1
Author NinjaX Posted March 24, 2016 Author Posted March 24, 2016 Just curious is the fact that she is Chinese matter? Is her ethnicity something new for you? I'm Chinese as well so it's not new. She's been in Canada for 7 years. Physical contact such as kissing can be viewed as a very intimate act in Asian culture whereas Western culture it's almost expected for first date. Basically, I am giving her somewhat of a benefit of the doubt because of culture, but I just want to keep a clear head so I am not bull*****ting myself. 1
jen1447 Posted March 24, 2016 Posted March 24, 2016 No text back = over, sorry. (I'm assuming it's been longer than like 10 minutes since you texted?) 1
Gaeta Posted March 24, 2016 Posted March 24, 2016 I'm Chinese as well so it's not new. She's been in Canada for 7 years. Physical contact such as kissing can be viewed as a very intimate act in Asian culture whereas Western culture it's almost expected for first date. Basically, I am giving her somewhat of a benefit of the doubt because of culture, but I just want to keep a clear head so I am not bull*****ting myself. Do Chinese women play hard to get? Do they expect a man to make several attempts before going out on a second date? Are you yourself very traditional or more western? 1
Author NinjaX Posted March 24, 2016 Author Posted March 24, 2016 Do Chinese women play hard to get? Do they expect a man to make several attempts before going out on a second date? Are you yourself very traditional or more western? Good questions. Going through the answers in my head I think all signs point to I'm out. 1
Zippy2000 Posted March 24, 2016 Posted March 24, 2016 Do Chinese women play hard to get? Do they expect a man to make several attempts before going out on a second date? Are you yourself very traditional or more western? No, Chinese women aren't any different from any other women. She probably doesn't know how to let you down gently. Both my parents are Chinese and they are very forward and blunt. Most of the Chinese community are. Shes probably trying not to say anything as there is no damage when you say nothing at all. 2
kendahke Posted March 24, 2016 Posted March 24, 2016 I met a Chinese woman from OKCupid on Tuesday night for first meet up over a drink. It turned into a 3 hour conversation where she did most of the talking before I ended it. While there were plenty of laughters and smiles with nonstop flowing conversation, after we exited the place, she sort of just said good bye and walked away presenting no position for me to go for a kiss or even a hug. I waited a day and sent her a follow up text saying I had a good time, and I would be glad to plan something fun with her again later. No response to that. My gut feeling tells me it's over and part of me thinks it's best to just forget about asking her out anyways. Thoughts? Send one more message through the site--it'll tell you when she read it. If she responds, you'll have your answer. If she doesn't, you'll have your answer. There is the outside chance that she didn't get the text. It's happened to me. 1
spriggan2 Posted March 24, 2016 Posted March 24, 2016 If it'll give you peace of mind maybe send another text. Personally I just let em go and move on when I get that gut feeling. Lotta ghosts on the OLD scene. I feel like if she was into you she would send a text. 1
Satu Posted March 24, 2016 Posted March 24, 2016 I don't think either of you were much impressed with the other. Does that matter? No.
fitnessfan365 Posted March 24, 2016 Posted March 24, 2016 That's happened to me from time to time. I remember awhile back I had what I thought was a great first date bowling with this attractive English woman. Lots of stuff in common, laugher, flirting, etc.. Then at the end of the date, she positioned herself to give me a sideways hug and said "I'll call you". My gut was that it was a blow off, but I always follow up the next day if want to see a woman again. Sent a quick text like you did and nothing. I took her no response as an obvious answer and let it go. My advice is to do the same here. 1
Author NinjaX Posted March 24, 2016 Author Posted March 24, 2016 That's happened to me from time to time. I remember awhile back I had what I thought was a great first date bowling with this attractive English woman. Lots of stuff in common, laugher, flirting, etc.. Then at the end of the date, she positioned herself to give me a sideways hug and said "I'll call you". My gut was that it was a blow off, but I always follow up the next day if want to see a woman again. Sent a quick text like you did and nothing. I took her no response as an obvious answer and let it go. My advice is to do the same here. Thinking back to my date, I think my crucial mistake was not verbally escalating sexually aka flirting. She was comfortable with the conversation and it's too much of a friend vibe. Live and learn. 1
Satu Posted March 24, 2016 Posted March 24, 2016 Thinking back to my date, I think my crucial mistake was not verbally escalating sexually aka flirting. She was comfortable with the conversation and it's too much of a friend vibe. *Live and learn. *Thats why I said it doesn't matter, and why it isn't a wasted experience. It's just a paragraph in the book of your life. 1
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