Completely Blocking Him On Social Media

[YWGMan]

So we have been broken up for the past 3 and a half months up to now (almost 3year realtionship) that i decided that it is not healthy for me seeing him and the new guy posting photos on Instagram, that i finally had the courage to block him on all my social media. We did have the agreement to not delete or block each other to our social media accounts (his idea that it is immature) but i just could not take it anymore.

 

He ended the relationship because he met someone (cheated unfortunately) and then told me that it is not working for us anymore after almost 3 years in the relationship.

 

I agreed that we will still be friends thru social media but after seeing him posting photos and travelling to the exact same city where we celebrated our 2nd year anniversary, posting photos of them going to the same coffee shop where we went to to, that museum where we were supposed to go visit next time made my stomach turn upside down after seeing all the photos that he's been posting today. It is the most hurtful feeling in the world. I was so stupid not to block him completely after the break up. (one cousin told me to do it after we broke up but did not listen) on the upside i have never talk to him ever after we broke up. he sent me many messages but never responded in a any of them.

 

I can honestly say that i am still not completely over him but today i did have the courage to block him completely and protect myself from getting more hurt and prolonging my healing.

 

Instagram is the worst, although i unfollowed him and block him i have still the capability to search his public profile and see his posts. (any tips?)

 

The entire 2 something years he was a good guy, treated me well, until we broke up after knowing that he was testing the waters with someone else (while still together) while i was very certain that he was acting good and faithful to me the entire time and then blind sided me with the break up. (the worst feeling)

 

Its been a very tough battle i can say but i am surviving day by day.

 

I need to focus more on to myself and completely heal from this.

 

I have been talking to some guys but i think its unfair that i cannot give my 100% at this time. its been 3.5 months since the break up.

 

It is not easy. There are days that are good and days that are bad. I am thinking about getting help from a professional counsellor and get feedback from them because honestly my family and friends are very supportive hearing my venting and all but at this point they had enough already.

 

Thanks for taking the time to read my drama for today.

 

 

Comments/feedbacks and advises are greatly appreciated.

 

See my previous post if you want to know more details.

 

Thanks very much.

Edited March 23, 2016 by YWGMan

[Country_Girl]

I say block him.

 

And that doesn't mean it's a "mean" thing. But it hurts you. So why would you continue to let something that hurts you in your life?

 

You could "un-follow" so you don't get the news feed, but if you are tempted to look at his page then you need to block. If you get a message asking why, just say you need to focus on you right now and healing, no hard feelings.

 

Listen, I blocked my ex on facebook. Do I still have feelings? Sure. But I knew I would be tempted to look at his page from time to time, which would only delay the healing process. I feel so much better now. Sure, I could unblock at anytime, but what purpose would that serve? Wouldn't do me any good.

 

So either remove his news feed, or block. It will help you heal so much sooner.

[Rachel39]

Why did he not want you to block him because he had access to your life.. When you meet someone else you just don't forget about the last person.

 

So he still wanted to be able to keep in touch with you in some way.

 

My ex blocked me straight away and deleted all our pictures when we ended it and I'm glad he did because I can't see what he's doing.but it still cuts me up the brutellness of deleting 2 years of pictures

 

I deleted what'sapp this where we communicated all the time and I don't want to know when he's on line or not..

 

You have to protect yourself think about him is one thing but having to put yourself through seeing it... Is torturing yourself and will probably bother him that you have blocked him

[smudge21]

I truly hate social media especially when it comes to break ups. Prior to that, when you lost contact with someone, that was it. Now, you are still very much involved in their postcard life; seeing all the good times, all the smiles, all the happiness... and you're not a part of it with them anymore (funny isn't it that no one ever posts sad stuff on there). I even actively avoid adding anyone on FB if I'm getting close to them. I don't want to know about their lives other than what they tell me in person. In a world where so many scream for privacy, we all seem so happy to share everything with everyone.

 

 

Stay blocked and stay away from any of that stalking online stuff. Every time you see something, it only sets you back to day one of healing. His life isn't your life and always remember that what you see on social media is only a snapshot of someone's life - it doesn't mean they're always happy. And finally, he cheated and then wanted to still remain friends? Sorry, but that's not a friend I'd want in my life. You can do better.

[YWGMan]

Thank you all for the honest feedback, means so much, I blocked him completely and hopefully I won't regret that in the future. now time to focus on to myself and time to get in touch with the reality. It really is hard to detached yourself when you are completely dependent to your partner about happiness. What he did was just very hurtful, insensitive and very inconsiderate.

 

Betrayal is the worst and I do still feel so low at times especially my self esteem after being dumped and rejected.

 

Sometimes I ask myself why he did this to me and do I deserve the kind of treatment when he broke up with me. I have been very honest and loyal to him since day one.

 

Break ups sucks. The plans that we have together just disappeared in one click, and after seeing him posting all those photos on his Instagram page made it even worst.

 

I know time will heal the pain. I know the only thing that will give me peace in my heart is to forgive him. I have a lot of anger and resentment towards him and I know it is not healthy and on top of that social media is a major catalyst in adding more to the anger and resentment that I have for him.

 

How do I find that peace in my heart? He asked for sorry and forgiveness but I haven't responded to him (2 weeks after BU). In my head I don't want to give him the satisfaction of me being okay with what he did and how he treated me at the end of the relationship.

 

I told myself not to talk to him unless he wanted to get back together and address his wrongdoing and will make an effort to work on our relationship. At this point I don't see that happening because he is with another guy already.

 

How do I find that peace and forgiveness without communicating that to him?

Let me hear your stories about forgiveness, acceptance and finding peace after a terrible break up.

 

Thanks,

[PegNosePete]

How do I find that peace and forgiveness without communicating that to him?

Let me re-frame that for you.

 

How would communicating your forgiveness to him, give you more peace than not communicating it?

 

Forgiveness and peace comes from within you. It's not necessary to tell someone that you forgive them. You just do it, and move on.

 

Communicating it to him will just cause you more pain.

[JustAnotherLostLove]

Yeah... My ex is also still on my FB, and I ended up blocking (not deleting) her as well... I dread for the day that I might be temped to check up on her, only to see her, with someone else, sharing our memories with him. Hopefully I'll never check, I've been doing pretty good so far!

 

But I feel for you, and I'm sorry. He's OBVIOUSLY not the person for you, no cheater is, ever. I guess I should have considered the same, when I ended up stealing my ex from her fiance.

[YWGMan]

Let me re-frame that for you.

 

How would communicating your forgiveness to him, give you more peace than not communicating it?

 

Forgiveness and peace comes from within you. It's not necessary to tell someone that you forgive them. You just do it, and move on.

 

Communicating it to him will just cause you more pain.

 

Thanks for that, i really want to forgive him so i can move on but with the hurt and pain that i still feel i dont know when will be that time. i feel like i have a lot to say about what he did, i feel like i didnt have the chance to tell him how dissapointed, frustrated and hurt i feel.

 

I've always been tempted to email him and lay it all out there (resentment and anger) but i ask myself if i did that what will it do to me? will i feel better after? maybe for a bit, and i want to show him too that i am the bigger person here and thats why up to now i have never responded to any of his messages.

 

I do miss him and still have the love for him but i dont really know if i will still be happy with him after all.

[Simon Phoenix]

Thanks for that, i really want to forgive him so i can move on but with the hurt and pain that i still feel i dont know when will be that time. i feel like i have a lot to say about what he did, i feel like i didnt have the chance to tell him how dissapointed, frustrated and hurt i feel.

 

I've always been tempted to email him and lay it all out there (resentment and anger) but i ask myself if i did that what will it do to me? will i feel better after? maybe for a bit, and i want to show him too that i am the bigger person here and thats why up to now i have never responded to any of his messages.

 

I do miss him and still have the love for him but i dont really know if i will still be happy with him after all.

 

And let's be real, the goal behind doing that would be to elicit a reaction from him. And when he doesn't react the way you want him to, it's going to set you back.

 

It's best to let that sleeping dog lie.

[YWGMan]

And let's be real, the goal behind doing that would be to elicit a reaction from him. And when he doesn't react the way you want him to, it's going to set you back.

 

It's best to let that sleeping dog lie.

 

It is easier said than done. Today i checked his Instagram page again since it is a public profile. I am afraid that i am turning into a cyber stalker now. It is not helping me although i did blocked him already and i can still check his page.

 

Should i delete my Instagram?