Mrs.Dee Posted March 18, 2016 Posted March 18, 2016 I have been flirting online with this man for a few years now. He is obviously interested, but I don't know in what. Often he ask me if I want to have lunch with him where he works. He works in a big office with nice restaurants in the basement area. He has also agreed to meet in places of my picking, like cafees, restaurants etc. I just don't get why he asks me to meet him at his work? Is it out of laziness, so he doesn't have to go anywhere to meet me or what?! I don't think I would have asked someone i didn't know so well to come to my office and have lunch in our cantina?
Satu Posted March 18, 2016 Posted March 18, 2016 Maybe he's a skinflint, and the works cafe is cheap. It's not very special, is it? 1
TXGuy Posted March 18, 2016 Posted March 18, 2016 He has asked you to lunch near his work and he has asked you to lunch anywhere else of your own choosing. You appear to have declined all invitations. You don't like some of his suggestions, but have not come up with any of your own. You obviously have no interest in this guy. He should catch on to that at some point. 3
Tahirthegreat Posted March 18, 2016 Posted March 18, 2016 Since he has given you the chance to pick a spot to eat, why not suggest somewhere else? Unless youre not interested, and if so, then let him know so hes not wasting his time. 1
elaine567 Posted March 18, 2016 Posted March 18, 2016 I have been flirting online with this man for a few years now. He is obviously interested, but I don't know in what. Often he ask me if I want to have lunch with him where he works. He works in a big office with nice restaurants in the basement area. He has also agreed to meet in places of my picking, like cafees, restaurants etc. I just don't get why he asks me to meet him at his work? Is it out of laziness, so he doesn't have to go anywhere to meet me or what?! I don't think I would have asked someone i didn't know so well to come to my office and have lunch in our cantina? As you say he has nice restaurants at his work, not a cantina.. Most people at lunch time have a set time ie an hour, so walking to a place even just 5-10 minutes away can take a huge chunk out of the time for lunch.
Zahara Posted March 18, 2016 Posted March 18, 2016 He has also agreed to meet in places of my picking, like cafees, restaurants etc. He suggested places and also gave you the option of picking a place of your preference. Not sure what the problem is -- and flirting online for a few years? 1
brothers343 Posted March 18, 2016 Posted March 18, 2016 This post is kind of weird to me, maybe I'm missing something or there is more to your story. You have been flirting with this man for 2 years and you haven't met yet? Im guessing you live in the same state. He asked you to meet him wherever.....to your liking. To me you sound like a woman that likes her ego boost and thats about it. Your not interested in this man or you would have met already. Your wasting your time and soon he will get the Idea that he has wasted his time on you. I don't mean to be harsh.....I'm just a very straight forward kind of guy. Good luck. 1
Author Mrs.Dee Posted March 18, 2016 Author Posted March 18, 2016 You are kind of right there are more to the story here... because neighter of us are single. (please don't judge me - that hard...) We have met but only once - about 4 years ago. So that is also about how long this has been going on, but it has been online flirting in periods off on, and mostly just normal conversation. I use to turn him down when he goes from friendly to flirty. Then he goes away for some time, but after a while he use to msg me again. Just normal friendly conversation in the begynning: like how have you been?, anything new? etc. I don't think he is trying to save money, even the cantina area in his work is probably cheaper then a normal restaurant. The reason why I think that is because he used to invite me to real expensive places when we first started to talk, but I declined his request for that, mostly because I don't think I would be comfortable with the dresscodes. And no I didn't really think of it as cheating either, as it would only be an exciting lunch for me, and nothing more. But anyway, I still don't get why he invites me to his work?
LivingDeadGrl Posted March 18, 2016 Posted March 18, 2016 You are kind of right there are more to the story here... because neighter of us are single. (please don't judge me - that hard...) We have met but only once - about 4 years ago. So that is also about how long this has been going on, but it has been online flirting in periods off on, and mostly just normal conversation. I use to turn him down when he goes from friendly to flirty. Then he goes away for some time, but after a while he use to msg me again. Just normal friendly conversation in the begynning: like how have you been?, anything new? etc. I don't think he is trying to save money, even the cantina area in his work is probably cheaper then a normal restaurant. The reason why I think that is because he used to invite me to real expensive places when we first started to talk, but I declined his request for that, mostly because I don't think I would be comfortable with the dresscodes. And no I didn't really think of it as cheating either, as it would only be an exciting lunch for me, and nothing more. But anyway, I still don't get why he invites me to his work? Maybe it's more convenient for him to meet you at his work? Maybe he only has an hour lunch? You haven't really given much detail. What do you gain from any of this by doing it behind your partners back?
RecentChange Posted March 18, 2016 Posted March 18, 2016 Are you planning to have an affair with this man? If not, it would be best if you didn't have lunch with him.
Author Mrs.Dee Posted March 18, 2016 Author Posted March 18, 2016 Maybe it's more convenient for him to meet you at his work? Maybe he only has an hour lunch? You haven't really given much detail. What do you gain from any of this by doing it behind your partners back? Maybe you are right about the convenience thing. I have actually told my partner about this guy - there really isnt that much to hide - as of yet.
Tahirthegreat Posted March 18, 2016 Posted March 18, 2016 You are kind of right there are more to the story here... because neighter of us are single. (please don't judge me - that hard...) Oh wow, please just break up with your boyfriend since you dont love him. Dont let that poor guy go on thinking he has a good relationship, unless you two have an open relationship, then forget what I just said.
Erik30 Posted March 18, 2016 Posted March 18, 2016 He probably wants to meet you there so he won't run into his girlfriend... and since you both are in a relationship, he may want to take you back to his office after lunch because you two can't go to his place. (or yours) My guess is that it's more about possible sex for him 1
Author Mrs.Dee Posted March 18, 2016 Author Posted March 18, 2016 (edited) He probably wants to meet you there so he won't run into his girlfriend... and since you both are in a relationship, he may want to take you back to his office after lunch because you two can't go to his place. (or yours) My guess is that it's more about possible sex for him I think you actually might be right! You have to have an ID card to enter the building, and you have to work there to have an ID card, so that means greater control of who will be in the surroundings than outside. But because he has also suggested to meet me outside his office, i don't think its that important for him that it is inside and not outside . Edited March 18, 2016 by Mrs.Dee
Author Mrs.Dee Posted March 18, 2016 Author Posted March 18, 2016 Are you planning to have an affair with this man? If not, it would be best if you didn't have lunch with him. No, I wasn't planning to have an affair with him. But I am curious about what this is, because it has lastet for so many years now. I was thinking it might be easier to turn the back on something if I knew what it was. Online chatting is one thing and reality doesn't have to be the same neighter for him or me. And if it is.... well if we managed to stay in contact for 4 years without having an affair, my bet is that we will be able to stay in contact for 4 new years without having an affair in the future as well
fitnessfan365 Posted March 18, 2016 Posted March 18, 2016 Yeah my first reaction was the same. How interested can you actually be yourself if nothing has happened in two years? Maybe he is playing it closer to the vest because nothing has materialized yet after all this time.
Author Mrs.Dee Posted March 18, 2016 Author Posted March 18, 2016 Yeah my first reaction was the same. How interested can you actually be yourself if nothing has happened in two years? Maybe he is playing it closer to the vest because nothing has materialized yet after all this time. Sorry, I havn't heard that expression before.
brothers343 Posted March 18, 2016 Posted March 18, 2016 Ms. Dee I'm not going to judge becouse I'm no judge but I am a very smart guy and If you continue down this path the jury will find you guilty. There's nothing good that will come from this situation except only a 10 percent or lower chance that you guys will make it. Good luck ms.dee.
TXGuy Posted March 18, 2016 Posted March 18, 2016 (edited) Are you planning to have an affair with this man? If not, it would be best if you didn't have lunch with him. You might be onto something. OP, would you prefer he suggested lunch at a local hotel's restaurant? Edited March 18, 2016 by TXGuy
Miss Peach Posted March 18, 2016 Posted March 18, 2016 From what you posted and my experience with men, he wants something out of meeting you. Most likely to start turning things into an affair - at least after a few meetings.
PogoStick Posted March 18, 2016 Posted March 18, 2016 Who cares about the guy who you've met once in 4 years? I see my mechanic more than that.
Author Mrs.Dee Posted March 19, 2016 Author Posted March 19, 2016 Who cares about the guy who you've met once in 4 years? I see my mechanic more than that. Yes, but you probably havn't sent your mechanic more than 8000 messages, during that time - i hope . Or actually I havn't sent him 8000 messages, its more like I have sent him about 4000 msg and he has sent me 4000.
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