Lack Of Dates

March 19, 2016

As an Australian resident paying a good chunk of taxes, it really really irks me that my money is going to finance such a wasteful lifestyle. I never signed anything authorising it to go to pay your so called "love language" bs.

I work for luxuries.

I need government money for food and transportationto college - part time work alone wouldn't be enough to live on.

Not one Australian I have met thinks that I should work full time during my podiatry degree.

My bf earns about 60k a year. That isn't enough to fully support me.... so he does whatever he.

Centrelink has a thing called Aus Study. Look it up.

MOST full time students accept this weekly allowance of 250 dollars and they also have to work part time in order to survive.

I work part time, accept Aus study, like MOST students, and buy most kf my food, transport, textbooks and phone plan.

My bf does the rent.

I don't see what is so wrong here? Occasionally I buy non essentials. Maybe once a month I getmy eyebrows waxes for 20 dollars. Hardly extravagant.

And with the money I earn from my job, twice a year I stock up on mid range but decent skincare. Nothing super expensive.

So my job js just for Pocket money so that once every so often I can get non essentials.

I do not spend government money on anything besides what it's intended for.

No lecturers, students or people I have ever met have seen anything wrong with choosing to work part time rather than fulltime during my full time studies.

Aus study is called aus STUDY for a reason -- it is INTENDED to enable students to only hqve to work part time during college rather than full time.

March 19, 2016

Leigh, did you read the link I posted from AUStudy? You are supposed to declare your de facto partner's income. If you are living with him in a relationship, you are considered de facto partners. It is fraudulent and a crime to not declare it.

March 19, 2016

Well working full time through college here isn't the norm.

Has it ever occurred to you that most students don't have the aptitude to work full time and alsl study full time? I personally wouldn't pass.

Andu have to finish my degree within 4 years. So part time study isn't even an option for many students.

Most people see assistance during college as essential for many students in order for the students to actually achieve pass grades.

I have NEVER met an Australian who thinks full time students are lazy for opting to workpart time rather than fulltime?

Your attitude is totally bizarre.

99% of nornal people would see studying full time and working full time as hard working lol.

Im quite normal thanks...and no one said life is a "easy pass" well for some its not I guess..its all about the choices we choose and the values we have I guess.. I don't remember getting a hand book when I turned 18 saying I was entitled to a easy education or degree I guess I missed it oh well..lol

I think you are missing what myself and others are really saying tho the issue is you are spending your earned cash to cover frivolous things things one could be doing with out while you are saying you "need" the government assistance for the basic things don't you see the issue there? no one "needs" 40$ shampoo...im sorry that 40 bucks could go towards your travel expenses or meals...

Edited March 19, 2016 by Ferret

March 19, 2016

I hate to say this, but from https://www.humanservices.gov.au/customer/services/centrelink/austudy :

It seems fairly obvious that you are not declaring that you are living with a de facto partner who earns $60k(?) and supports you. I have nothing against students who accept a student allowance when they are struggling - those students typically have to pay rent, do not have a designer wardrobe, live in a flatshare with several other flatmates to save money, and cook or eat pizza/fish n chips/instant noodles most of the time. And they certainly don't get to hire people to wash their bathrooms. Nobody needs $1100 a month for just food, textbooks, phone and toiletries.

I get that it's tempting and the govt doesn't really check on you, but come on, Leigh.

Why should my partner have to 100% support me on a meagre 60k income?

He isn't my husband. He helps but come on now. Why should he have to foot the bill for 100% of my lifestyle?!

To help him help me out, I work part time and receive Aus study.

Centrelink is aware of my living situation by the way.... the don't see why my partner pf under 2 years should have to entirely support me. We aren't married?

Heaps of girls are in my situation. They live at home or with their boyfriends, receive aus study from government and work part time.

Even my friend with a well off bf recieved Aus study allowance when at uni until she got a good part time job and only then did she get off government assistance.

Even comfortable mej aren't expected to foot the bill for their girlfriend's during college. Most students recieve benefits and also work part time.

March 19, 2016

Im quite normal thanks...and no one said life is a "easy pass" well for some its not I guess..its all about the choices we choose and the values we have I guess.. I don't remember getting a hand book when I turned 18 saying I was entitled to a easy education or degree I guess I missed it oh well..lol

I think you are missing what myself and others are really saying tho the issue is you are spending your earned cash to cover frivolous things things one could be doing with out while you are saying you "need" the government assistance for the basic things don't you see the issue there? no one "needs" 40$ shampoo...im sorry that 40 bucks could go towards your travel expenses or meals...

Well I am considered quite normal for over here for wishing to only work part time during my fill time degree.

Please explain to me why absolutely none of the students in my cohort work full time?

March 19, 2016

Well I am considered quite normal for over here for wishing to only work part time during my fill time degree.

Please explain to me why absolutely none of the students in my cohort work full time?

Cause they are choosing the easy way on some one else dime?

March 19, 2016

My boyfriend doesn't see me as lazy for studying fulltime and working a couple days a week.

We both had to declare our lives situations.

He thinks people care crazy for working full time during a difficult degree.

Part time work is very dooable with studies but not full time.

All the female acquaintances I know of have partners who feel the same.

End of the day, I feel like I am earning my degree by studying hard and working when I can ( which is part time).

I don't see why studenta can't gwt government assistance or loans so they don't hqve to study all day and then go straight to work; that is an 8 hour day of study and then a what, another 8 hours working at a bar? Come on now. It iw just not realistic to expect MOST students to do that.

Again! Thr LECTURERS actually URGE US at the start kf our degres to " please accwpt government assistance so you don't have to work too many ho8rs a week"

.. our own lecturers forewarn us students to NOT WORK FULL TIME.

March 19, 2016

Why should my partner have to 100% support me on a meagre 60k income?

He isn't my husband. He helps but come on now. Why should he have to foot the bill for 100% of my lifestyle?!

To help him help me out, I work part time and receive Aus study.

Centrelink is aware of my living situation by the way.... the don't see why my partner pf under 2 years should have to entirely support me. We aren't married?

Heaps of girls are in my situation. They live at home or with their boyfriends, receive aus study from government and work part time.

Even my friend with a well off bf recieved Aus study allowance when at uni until she got a good part time job and only then did she get off government assistance.

Even comfortable mej aren't expected to foot the bill for their girlfriend's during college. Most students recieve benefits and also work part time.

Leigh, I don't believe one single person has said that your bf should be supporting you 100%. I, for one, don't think he should be supporting you at ALL.

You're an adult, you're perfectly capable of supporting yourself. If your part-time job doesn't cover your $50 mascara or $40 shampoo? Guess what? You live without them. You find cheaper alternatives. You do what mature adults do and live within your budget.

Your government assistance sounds very much like the U.S. Pell grant program - grants for low income students. These grants are meant to cover things like food, rent, utilities, school supplies, tuition and textbooks. School related expenses, or living expenses that can't be covered by a part time job. Not eyebrow waxes, high end cosmetics/shampoos/etc.

And I'm sorry to say, but expecting your boyfriend to buy you fancy dresses, spoil you with massages, etc, and then having the audacity to complain that he doesn't take you out on enough dates - this makes you shallow and materialistic. Look at what you DO have and be damned grateful for it.

March 19, 2016

Why should my partner have to 100% support me on a meagre 60k income?

He isn't my husband. He helps but come on now. Why should he have to foot the bill for 100% of my lifestyle?!

To help him help me out, I work part time and receive Aus study.

Centrelink is aware of my living situation by the way.... the don't see why my partner pf under 2 years should have to entirely support me. We aren't married?

Heaps of girls are in my situation. They live at home or with their boyfriends, receive aus study from government and work part time.

Even my friend with a well off bf recieved Aus study allowance when at uni until she got a good part time job and only then did she get off government assistance.

Even comfortable mej aren't expected to foot the bill for their girlfriend's during college. Most students recieve benefits and also work part time.

He doesn't have to support you, it's just that you shouldn't double dip. You shouldn't be taking other people's taxes when you are already being taken care of. Like I said, nobody needs $1100/month for just food, phone, books, and toiletries. That's more than my SO and I spent when we were in college for everything, including rent! Some people do spend a lot on luxuries, but they typically aren't on govt assistance so it's not my business what they choose to do with their privately-earned money. When you take taxpayers money, it becomes a public concern.

So you have declared to CentreLink that you are living with your boyfriend (de facto Rs count as partners in Australia AFAIK, marriage is irrelevant) who earns $60k/year and they are still giving you $1100/month? Well, as long as it's aboveboard I can't say you are in the wrong, although I can see why Australians who pay taxes might get annoyed at that. But IMO if you had any conscience at all you would be a lot more judicious with your claims. Lots of us CAN take advantage of taxpayer money, we just choose not to because we don't feel it's right.

March 19, 2016

Cause they are choosing the easy way on some one else dime?

You do realize that most Australians agree that Aus study is appropriate for full time students?

Aus study exists because the majority of Australians believe that students should not have to work full time.

Studying podiatry fulltime and also working weekends is not what most Aussies classify as " lazy" lol!

March 19, 2016

I just asked my ex who is a lecturer what he thinks.

He thinks it's absurd to expect students to work full time, 30 houre plus per week, and als study for the requisite 40 hours a week....

There is a reason qhy the Australian public voted in Aus Study as part of the government legislation.

He also divulged that his lecturer co workers are always lamenting that the students who work too much fail too often and end up wastint so much money on failed courses.

So pretty much no one involved in academia supports the notion that students shoule work and also study on a full time basis.

March 19, 2016

I don't think anyone is saying you should work full-time while studying. We're saying your expenses are wasteful especially for someone on government assistance. If you absolutely neeeeed all of the luxuries you speak of, then yes you should work full time. Because that is a lifestyle choice that you make, and strangers shouldn't be footing the bill for it.

If you want to receive a student's allowance and not be the subject of derision, then live like a normal student.

March 19, 2016

I just asked my ex who is a lecturer what he thinks.

He thinks it's absurd to expect students to work full time, 30 houre plus per week, and als study for the requisite 40 hours a week....

There is a reason qhy the Australian public voted in Aus Study as part of the government legislation.

He also divulged that his lecturer co workers are always lamenting that the students who work too much fail too often and end up wastint so much money on failed courses.

So pretty much no one involved in academia supports the notion that students shoule work and also study on a full time basis.

So don't work full-time. Live within your means. Cut back on expenses. Eliminate most things that aren't necessities. No, you don't have to eliminate everything, but perhaps learn to groom your own eyebrows, find cheaper alternatives for your toiletries - be a brand snob only after you've graduated and obtained gainful employment.

March 19, 2016

I just asked my ex who is a lecturer what he thinks.

He thinks it's absurd to expect students to work full time, 30 houre plus per week, and als study for the requisite 40 hours a week....

There is a reason qhy the Australian public voted in Aus Study as part of the government legislation.

He also divulged that his lecturer co workers are always lamenting that the students who work too much fail too often and end up wastint so much money on failed courses.

So pretty much no one involved in academia supports the notion that students shoule work and also study on a full time basis.

Absurd?

I did it. Worked as a night auditor at a hotel from 11 pm to 7 am five days a week. I was usually finished with my work by 2 am which gave me plenty of time to study.

My daughter also worked full-time while in college. Graduated in four years with honors.

Where there is a will, there is a way.

March 19, 2016

Also, no one is suggesting that you shouldn't take advantage of the government money. We're only suggesting that you're using it inappropriately. That is taxpayers' money - it doesn't just appear out of thin air for the government to give you. The taxpayers expect that money to be used for educational expenses and basic, necessary living expenses. That does not include most of what you've detailed in your many posts.

March 19, 2016

Absurd?

I did it. Worked as a night auditor at a hotel from 11 pm to 7 am five days a week. I was usually finished with my work by 2 am which gave me plenty of time to study.

My daughter also worked full-time while in college. Graduated in four years with honors.

Where there is a will, there is a way.

Yes. When I was in school a little more than a year ago, I managed to work a very stressful, full-time job, with very little downtime, and go to school full-time as well, and I still obtained straight As. I didn't get weekends - my days off from work were the days I attended classes. But I budgeted my time, and my money - I was able to work, study, and still have a social life - and my schoolwork didn't suffer.

March 19, 2016

Leigh, I don't believe one single person has said that your bf should be supporting you 100%. I, for one, don't think he should be supporting you at ALL.

You're an adult, you're perfectly capable of supporting yourself. If your part-time job doesn't cover your $50 mascara or $40 shampoo? Guess what? You live without them. You find cheaper alternatives. You do what mature adults do and live within your budget.

Your government assistance sounds very much like the U.S. Pell grant program - grants for low income students. These grants are meant to cover things like food, rent, utilities, school supplies, tuition and textbooks. School related expenses, or living expenses that can't be covered by a part time job. Not eyebrow waxes, high end cosmetics/shampoos/etc.

And I'm sorry to say, but expecting your boyfriend to buy you fancy dresses, spoil you with massages, etc, and then having the audacity to complain that he doesn't take you out on enough dates - this makes you shallow and materialistic. Look at what you DO have and be damned grateful for it.

I swear, people like you are probably jealous that some women are able to land kind boyfriends who spoil them.

I had loads of guys wanting a relationship with me who actually all delighted in treating ms to the dates and who offeredto take careof the rent and bills during college when I made it known that I was due to go backsoon. I didn't like them enough romantically so I chose ro end things anyway.

I guess my friend and I are just very very lucky that we can find men who don't force us to work full time during uni and instead, PREFER to make our lives easier.

You mentioned you had a well of guy who gives you slippers for Christmas and bdays and splits the check despite his good income? My two female friends don't personally date tight men. It doesn't make us less kind or loyal to our partners.

We all have different preferences.

You're not being forced to date me. Nor was my bf. Despitehaving options in women, he picked me because I make him happy and he enjoys/ prefers spoiling me to splitting the check.

My outlook is very common. Then again, just as many women aren't into being taken out and spoilt either. There is no wrong or right way to go about our personal relationships.

March 19, 2016

Yes. When I was in school a little more than a year ago, I managed to work a very stressful, full-time job, with very little downtime, and go to school full-time as well, and I still obtained straight As. I didn't get weekends - my days off from work were the days I attended classes. But I budgeted my time, and my money - I was able to work, study, and still have a social life - and my schoolwork didn't suffer.

That is great.

The majority of lecturers OR students here don't all agree that your way is ideal.

The majority of students accepting Aus StudyAND work part time. That is how they afford to live.

March 19, 2016

So don't work full-time. Live within your means. Cut back on expenses. Eliminate most things that aren't necessities. No, you don't have to eliminate everything, but perhaps learn to groom your own eyebrows, find cheaper alternatives for your toiletries - be a brand snob only after you've graduated and obtained gainful employment.

I do live within my means.

I spend aus study on essentials.

I spend work money on non essentials. And only very occasionally.

March 19, 2016

I swear, people like you are probably jealous that some women are able to land kind boyfriends who spoil them.

You mentioned you had a well of guy who gives you slippers for Christmas and bdays and splits the check despite his good income? My two female friends don't personally date tight men. It doesn't make us less kind or loyal to our partners.

You do realize that taking that personal dig at shystrawberry says way more about you than it does about her, right?

You are absolutely entitled to choose whom you will and won't date, but this isn't about that. People are trying to help you see that you're acting like a spoiled brat, Leigh. You can be so much better, if you only tried to be aware of things.

And you are giving student allowances a bad name - do you think that taxpayers will look at the sort of lifestyle you live while claiming it, and not have second thoughts about who/what they vote for? Which is pretty sad, because if the student allowance was abolished, all the genuine and frugal people who truly depend on it to study will suffer.

I spend aus study on essentials.

How are you spending $1100/month on 'essentials' when you're a student and don't pay rent????? You clearly need to reevaluate your definition of 'essentials'.

March 19, 2016

So, has your boyfriend agreed to take you out on more dates?

It doesn't have to be a $200 dinner, but more dates and getting out of the house? Have you resolved that issue with him?

March 19, 2016

I swear, people like you are probably jealous that some women are able to land kind boyfriends who spoil them.

I had loads of guys wanting a relationship with me who actually all delighted in treating ms to the dates and who offeredto take careof the rent and bills during college when I made it known that I was due to go backsoon. I didn't like them enough romantically so I chose ro end things anyway.

I guess my friend and I are just very very lucky that we can find men who don't force us to work full time during uni and instead, PREFER to make our lives easier.

You mentioned you had a well of guy who gives you slippers for Christmas and bdays and splits the check despite his good income? My two female friends don't personally date tight men. It doesn't make us less kind or loyal to our partners.

We all have different preferences.

You're not being forced to date me. Nor was my bf. Despitehaving options in women, he picked me because I make him happy and he enjoys/ prefers spoiling me to splitting the check.

My outlook is very common. Then again, just as many women aren't into being taken out and spoilt either. There is no wrong or right way to go about our personal relationships.

Sorry to burst your bubble, but I'm not jealous of you at all. Yes, my bf bought me slippers for Christmas. And I bought him a teakettle. We'd been dating 8 weeks, and were still getting to know each other. Even so, the slippers were not without thought and meaning - they were intended for me to leave at his house so that I didn't have to bring mine with me every time I spent the night, and so that my feet were warm while at his house. He'd even warm them up in his towel warmer before I got there - because that's what people who care for each other do.

And yes, we split the check when we went out to dinner. And you know what? I was perfectly happy to. Here's the thing - his overall income is higher than mine, but since he is self-employed, and the number of clients he was seeing had dropped, he was not making that much more than I was at the time. So we were both doing what we needed to do to live within our respective means. I wasn't going to make him go broke taking me out to dinner when I was perfectly capable, and willing, to help. Because I'm not materialistic or shallow, and don't expect these things of my boyfriend.

And now that his client-load is increasing, guess what? He buys dinner more often. He's planning an upcoming weekend trip for us, and is even letting me choose where we go. Do I expect these things from him? Absolutely not. And I will still pay for the occasional meal out, and I'll probably help with the trip, since he'll be doing the driving - but if things change for him financially, and he can no longer afford to take me, am I going to be on a public forum complaining about it? You'd better believe the answer is no.

I love my boyfriend because he treats me with care and respect and love, not because he spoils me (but he does spoil me - with acts of love and care and affection).

All of this, however, is totally beside the point - which is that your bf owes you nothing more than what he's already giving you. You have control over this situation - if he's not giving you what you need, you're more than free to find someone who does - but good luck with that.

Edited March 19, 2016 by shystrawberry

March 19, 2016

I actually agree with Leigh in that working full time while studying over here is pretty rare and not necessary for most people. We have a ton of Asian students who are only allowed to work a max of 20 hours a week. Minimum wage isn't terrible here, so it's still a useful income.

And to help students fund their studies the government helps with assistance. I'm happy for her to have more time to focus on her study.

What I do object to is people wanting that money, then expecting their boyfriend to pay for everything while hiding said boyfriends contributions so as to avail of the assistance. You are in a defacto relationship. If he supports you you are not entitled to that assistance. Full stop. Period.

You want to be spoiled with expensive gifts and gestures. And as you say many times you like spoiling him back. I really doubt that's what the government had in mind when they created the assistance scheme.

You say all guys are supposed to finance their girlfriend through uni. Utter nonsense. There are many guys who do enter into this relationship alright, they are called sugar Daddies.

March 19, 2016

You say all guys are supposed to finance their girlfriend through uni. Utter nonsense. There are many guys who do enter into this relationship alright, they are called sugar Daddies.

I wouldn't say it's always a SB situation - it's fairly common for long-term couples to support each other through periods of study or hardship. But yeah, agreed that it shouldn't be an expectation, and agreed with pretty much everything else in your post.

March 19, 2016

I wouldn't say it's always a SB situation - it's fairly common for long-term couples to support each other through periods of study or hardship. But yeah, agreed that it shouldn't be an expectation, and agreed with pretty much everything else in your post.

Yeah agreed. It's just the way Leigh describes the relationship sometimes as he financing her and treating her like a princess constantly makes it sound a bit SB like to me.

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