Lack Of Dates

March 19, 2016

God my job must be boring since I keep reading this nonsense.

I'm sorry Leigh but I think you just want attention. And you are so desperate for attention that you will make up stories to post on this board. I stopped reading around page 7 or 8? whatever page you mention being taken out for dinner last night and not enjoying the $200 meal.

You (Leigh) are so convinced that your boyfriend is your ticket to happiness if only he can buy you more more more. You remind me of Veruca Salt in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Honestly I think this reeks of laziness. If you want more more more, why not work more hours? Or get another job?

Guess what, I work full time and go to school full time. It can be done. And also I am American. And I do travel. So quit generalizing all of us into one misconstrued stereotype about not being able to afford professional degrees and travel. I traveled to five countries last year and I paid for both of those trips by myself.

March 19, 2016

Wanting to be a bit spoilt rather than disliking it when men split the bill isn't unhealthy.

I fundamentally don't like men who split the check or have lack the design to treat and spoil the women. I like them as friends perhaps but not lovers.

I am not sexually attracted to men who are petty enough to split the check. I literally don't see them in a sexual or romantic light.

But there is a huuuge difference between expecting to be a totally pampered princesses who refuses to work or havea career cos she wants a sugar daddy to fund her life, VERSUS a woman like me who loves to be spoilt but also a wants a career and to buy most of her own clothes and luxuries ( but would like occasionally like to be treated WITHIN HIS BUDGET).

I have reasonable standards and don't expect super expensive gifts beyohd the poor guys means.

Again- I have actually discarded men who were well off because I didn't have strong enough romantic feelings present.

But one needs a good amount of extra cash for the kind of dates you are clearly expecting or would you be happy just going out on a date that doesn't cost anything? what if a guy was short one week and you had to "split the check" that's life it happens least in most peoples reality unless you are rather well off..

Whats wrong with splitting the check once in a while? I don't get it you say you take care of yourself but in the next breath you "need to be spoiled".. you are full of contradictions to the point its confusing..

March 19, 2016

Um, just letting you know that your avatar is still up. If you think you have removed it, might want to check.

FTR, I think you could have stopped at saying "he has social anxiety due to something traumatic that happened to him a few years ago, can't elaborate for the sake of his privacy". Or otherwise, if you want to share all the details, don't put your avatar etc up so you and he can't be identified.

The $220 dinner is really confusing. Something definitely got lost in translation there, between you and him or between you and us. Either way, when he wanted to take you there, why didn't you suggest that he save the money so both of you could go out on more day outings instead? I also hope you didn't go on and on the way you did here about how it wasn't that great - nothing sucks more than paying $220 for your date to complain about the food and place.

Also, it really bugs me that someone who is living rent-free, has a closet full of designer dresses, spends $150 on mascara and is enjoying fancy dinners... is still accepting a student allowance(?) from the govt. Just because it is being offered and they aren't strictly enforcing the requirements doesn't mean that you should take advantage of it. Leigh, that is taxpayer money. That is money that comes out of the taxes of people who live in tiny rundown places in suburbs that you wouldn't deign to live in, who can't afford $150 mascara themselves, who have never been to a $220 dinner.

It doesn't bug me as much that your bf is supporting you - it's presumably his choice, he has consented, he can stop at any time... so if that's what he wants to do, fine. But taxpayers don't get a choice. Have some conscience and stop claiming allowances that you don't actually need.

I earn 100 to 200 a week working.

I get 550 a fortnight from the government for food and textband toiletries.

I spend my own money that I earn on 50 dollars mascara. 3 times per year.

I buy good skincare maybe twice a year ( 150 a pop) snd cheap Cetaphil in the interim.

I splurge on natural organic yet still effective shampoo and conditioner about 6 times a year at 40 dollarsa pop.

That is all. My mym buys my dresses occasionally and so does m6 bf. I never ask. They actually like treating me.

Taxpayers money is for transportation to and from collegs, textbooks and food. Also my phone bill--- which covers bothmy bf abd Is phone phane and hand sets.

Does that clarify things? He works full time and is happy to lay the rent rather than me working full time.........

March 19, 2016

But one needs a good amount of extra cash for the kind of dates you are clearly expecting or would you be happy just going out on a date that doesn't cost anything? what if a guy was short one week and you had to "split the check" that's life it happens least in most peoples reality unless you are rather well off..

Whats wrong with splitting the check once in a while? I don't get it you say you take care of yourself but in the next breath you "need to be spoiled".. you are full of contradictions to the point its confusing..

I find splitting the check cheap and tacky and I don't feel sexually attracted to men who split.

When it comes to rent and expensive overseas trips, a woman that works full time should absolutely contribute and not expect the man to foot the entire bill for everything when she works and earns her own living.

I am entitled to think men who split the check are petty and unattractive.

Actually, plenty of women on loveshack have stated that they also don't date ken who have the meansto treat a woman to dinner yet CHOOSE not to.

March 19, 2016

Is this thread about who pays for a date now? Yawn.

I find splitting the check cheap and tacky and I don't feel sexually attracted to men who split.

Really? You mean "paying for every single date forever and ever amen" would trump the other qualities a man has, even after the first few dates?

As in:

Has a great sense of humour but split the bill on date: sexual attraction gone.

Has his **** together but split the bill on date: sexual attraction gone.

Cares for me and loves me but split the bill on date: sexual attraction gone.

Is it really that easy for you to lose sexual attraction?

March 19, 2016

God my job must be boring since I keep reading this nonsense.

I'm sorry Leigh but I think you just want attention. And you are so desperate for attention that you will make up stories to post on this board. I stopped reading around page 7 or 8? whatever page you mention being taken out for dinner last night and not enjoying the $200 meal.

You (Leigh) are so convinced that your boyfriend is your ticket to happiness if only he can buy you more more more. You remind me of Veruca Salt in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Honestly I think this reeks of laziness. If you want more more more, why not work more hours? Or get another job?

Guess what, I work full time and go to school full time. It can be done. And also I am American. And I do travel. So quit generalizing all of us into one misconstrued stereotype about not being able to afford professional degrees and travel. I traveled to five countries last year and I paid for both of those trips by myself.

It's obvious you're American.

In Australia, no one thinks it's lazy to opt to only work part time through uni.

People would actually think you're odd for finding students lazy in the premise that they opt to work only part time.

The vast majority of students here CHOOSE to work part time wheb they are at college.

The only students who work full time during uni either HAVE TO do it or they have an easy degree and csn afford to work 40 hrs a week on top.

NO podiatry student in my cohort works full time.

So yeah. I def don't feel lazy for choosing to not work full time during a podiatry degree.

I need a guy who naturally has the urge to spoil his woman but I do also want to afford my own lifestyle as a whole-- with occasional dates or treats from a partner. With me footing the bill for the vast majority of my non essentials like beauty treatments and clothes.....

March 19, 2016

It's obvious you're American.

In Australia, no one thinks it's lazy to opt to only work part time through uni.

People would actually think you're odd for finding students lazy in the premise that they opt to work only part time.

The vast majority of students here CHOOSE to work part time wheb they are at college.

The only students who work full time during uni either HAVE TO do it or they have an easy degree and csn afford to work 40 hrs a week on top.

NO podiatry student in my cohort works full time.

So yeah. I def don't feel lazy for choosing to not work full time during a podiatry degree.

I need a guy who naturally has the urge to spoil his woman but I do also want to afford my own lifestyle as a whole-- with occasional dates or treats from a partner. With me footing the bill for the vast majority of my non essentials like beauty treatments and clothes.....

Actually I knew students who worked full time and yes the ones who accepted gov assistance when they really didn't need to were kinda seen as lazy its weather or not your friends wanted to actually say it was another thing most wouldn't well cause you don't want to be rude to your friends..

Most were working a lot to get thu school and pay their way be it shared accommodation or what ever their arrangements were..and if your that well off that you tech don't "need" the assistance why would you be on it?...

March 19, 2016

Is this thread about who pays for a date now? Yawn.

Really? You mean "paying for every single date forever and ever amen" would trump the other qualities a man has, even after the first few dates?

As in:

Has a great sense of humour but split the bill on date: sexual attraction gone.

Has his **** together but split the bill on date: sexual attraction gone.

Cares for me and loves me but split the bill on date: sexual attraction gone.

Is it really that easy for you to lose sexual attraction?

Yep.

I am inherently disgustedby men who CAN AFFORD to splurge yet CHOOSE not to treat their women to dates.

Men who are broke well fair enough.

It isn't an issue.... I never had issues finding men who were not into splitting.

My two female friends also aren't into mem that split the check. They aren't filthy gold diggers either.

March 19, 2016

Actually I knew students who worked full time and yes the ones who accepted gov assistance when they really didn't need to were kinda seen as lazy its weather or not your friends wanted to actually say it was another thing most wouldn't well cause you don't want to be rude to your friends..

Most were working a lot to get thu school and pay their way be it shared accommodation or what ever their arrangements were..and if your that well off that you tech don't "need" the assistance why would you be on it?...

Why would I choose to work full time when I have government assistance?

I personally findmy degree to hard to warrent a full time job.

Not a single podiatry student in my years works full time.

I do need the assistancefor food transport and to pass my degree.

March 19, 2016

Yep.

I am inherently disgustedby men who CAN AFFORD to splurge yet CHOOSE not to treat their women to dates.

Men who are broke well fair enough.

It isn't an issue.... I never had issues finding men who were not into splitting.

My two female friends also aren't into mem that split the check. They aren't filthy gold diggers either.

Inherently disgusted? Those are strong words.

What if someone was inherently disgusted by women who demand they be spoiled? Is that fair of them?

March 19, 2016

Actually I knew students who worked full time and yes the ones who accepted gov assistance when they really didn't need to were kinda seen as lazy its weather or not your friends wanted to actually say it was another thing most wouldn't well cause you don't want to be rude to your friends..

Most were working a lot to get thu school and pay their way be it shared accommodation or what ever their arrangements were..and if your that well off that you tech don't "need" the assistance why would you be on it?...

Umm none of my friends opted to work full time during college. ...

They accepted government assistance and worked part time or not at all.

No one sees it as lazy here to study fulltime/ workPART time.

March 19, 2016

Just say, "No," to Takers - An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of heartache.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/just-listen/201003/just-say-no-takers

While I have not been here that long I already realize the importance of sites like these that allow people to share experiences, or heartaches. Even though the OP may not get it, somewhere along the way someone just might learn something and save themselves.

This thread makes me appreciate (at least one important quality) even the women where things did not work out. Thanks

Lol!!

So wanting a mam who isn't into splitting the bill automatically makes me a taker.

Hilarious.

I am actually very generous when I have money; when I worked full time I spoilt and tewted my exes to crap all the time

March 19, 2016

Why would I choose to work full time when I have government assistance?

I personally findmy degree to hard to warrent a full time job.

Not a single podiatry student in my years works full time.

I do need the assistancefor food transport and to pass my degree.

Because as some one else pointed out why should others pay your way when you are perfectly capable? its not like you are disabled in some way and incapable of working? I think whats annoying a lot here is the fact you take from the system while spending your earned cash on frivolous things..

March 19, 2016

Umm none of my friends opted to work full time during college. ...

They accepted government assistance and worked part time or not at all.

No one sees it as lazy here to study fulltime/ workPART time.

Ok if you say so..

March 19, 2016

Hi, Leigh.

It was enlightening to read that you have Asperger's syndrome. I thought you had an unconventional style, and this explains why!

I totally get wanting to be with a man who has the desire and drive to treat you like a princess. When a man really loves a woman and is excited about her, this happens naturally. So anything less feels like a poor substitute for the real deal.

But it sounds to me as though you're really starting to understand each other and get on the same wavelength. I'm so happy for you that you've met such a great match!

Hang onto him, because a good man and a good match is VERY hard to find

March 19, 2016

Hi, Leigh.

It was enlightening to read that you have Asperger's syndrome. I thought you had an unconventional style, and this explains why!

I know im prob really going to be flamed here on this but that only goes so far with me its right up there with ADHD and BIPolar all over and self diagnosed to death and all used as excuses for repeated poor life choices.

Not saying that's what going on with the OP but yeah she seams like a some what coherent women I know im new to these forums so maybe I haven't seen enough of her posts to fully understand to me its all confusing at this point...

March 19, 2016

Ok if you say so..

Honestly, NO ONE in Australia expects or thinks students should have to study their 40 hr a week degree and also work full time.

It is a purely American thing.

I actually don't have the intellect capacity to passpodiatry and work full time. It just isn't possible.

Again- NONE...not ONE single other student kn my degree works full time.

For starters! There are no night classes. Leaving waitressing and bar work as the ONLY ways in which you could work full time.

Guess what? Not everyone is cut out for those jobs.

Even the lecturers advise us all to accept government funding and NOT WORK full time.

Part time 20 hr a week work plus a full time degree is seen as VERY BUSY here. Honestly no one finds it lazy?

God bless Australia lol. Being considered for not opting to wait tables for 40 hrs a week on top of 40 hrs of study would suck. Thank God not many students have to do that here.

March 19, 2016

Honestly, NO ONE in Australia expects or thinks students should have to study their 40 hr a week degree and also work full time.

It is a purely American thing.

I actually don't have the intellect capacity to passpodiatry and work full time. It just isn't possible.

Again- NONE...not ONE single other student kn my degree works full time.

For starters! There are no night classes. Leaving waitressing and bar work as the ONLY ways in which you could work full time.

Guess what? Not everyone is cut out for those jobs.

Even the lecturers advise us all to accept government funding and NOT WORK full time.

Part time 20 hr a week work plus a full time degree is seen as VERY BUSY here. Honestly no one finds it lazy?

God bless Australia lol. Being considered for not opting to wait tables for 40 hrs a week on top of 40 hrs of study would suck. Thank God not many students have to do that here.

Did I mention I lived over there?...its not just a American thing..but again if you say so im not going to argue with you over that..and what about retail jobs? there are other jobs available in the evenings not just bars and waitress work..if your happy accepting government assistance then great but thats your choice and is not the 100% norm 100% of the time im sorry..I knew a lot of students who worked their butts off to get thu school over there with out having to do that..

March 19, 2016

Hi, Leigh.

It was enlightening to read that you have Asperger's syndrome. I thought you had an unconventional style, and this explains why!

I totally get wanting to be with a man who has the desire and drive to treat you like a princess. When a man really loves a woman and is excited about her, this happens naturally. So anything less feels like a poor substitute for the real deal.

But it sounds to me as though you're really starting to understand each other and get on the same wavelength. I'm so happy for you that you've met such a great match!

Hang onto him, because a good man and a good match is VERY hard to find

Omgggggg he is just too good to be true.... I have waited ten years for the mutual chemistry and compatability to both be abundant in the one man.

It was always great sexual attraction towards men whoweren't into me or viceversa.

I am very fortunate. .. I never actually criticized my bf and I was sure to highlight how amazing he is!

It is purely me wanting to get out of the house more and to be treated to the OCCASIONAL date! Not every week; as I said, I don't enjoy dining out enough to warrant blown 200 dollars on the one evening. ....

As for my Asberges, I am thrilled my bf knows and understand it. He loves that I am different and can also relate, as he is an odd one too and has always felt like an outsider.

It is hard at times but tbh, men are very drawn to my offbeat and quirky nature. Although it is hard for someone like me to truly fit in and click in the long run, I have always been good at attracting men initially. And then they run when they can sense that I a socially abhorrent and even admit as much.

March 19, 2016

I earn 100 to 200 a week working.

I get 550 a fortnight from the government for food and textband toiletries.

I spend my own money that I earn on 50 dollars mascara. 3 times per year.

I buy good skincare maybe twice a year ( 150 a pop) snd cheap Cetaphil in the interim.

I splurge on natural organic yet still effective shampoo and conditioner about 6 times a year at 40 dollarsa pop.

That is all. My mym buys my dresses occasionally and so does m6 bf. I never ask. They actually like treating me.

Taxpayers money is for transportation to and from collegs, textbooks and food. Also my phone bill--- which covers bothmy bf abd Is phone phane and hand sets.

Does that clarify things? He works full time and is happy to lay the rent rather than me working full time.........

I hate to say this, but from https://www.humanservices.gov.au/customer/services/centrelink/austudy :

Maximum payment per fortnight single $433.20
couple, no children $433.20

ABSTUDY customers with partners

If you are 22 years or more, your payment will be reduced by 50 cents for every dollar your partner earns over $928. If you are under 22 years, your payment will be reduced by 60 cents for every dollar your partner earns over the maximum amount. The maximum amount depends on your partner’s circumstances.

It seems fairly obvious that you are not declaring that you are living with a de facto partner who earns $60k(?) and supports you. I have nothing against students who accept a student allowance when they are struggling - those students typically have to pay rent, do not have a designer wardrobe, live in a flatshare with several other flatmates to save money, and cook or eat pizza/fish n chips/instant noodles most of the time. And they certainly don't get to hire people to wash their bathrooms. Nobody needs $1100 a month for just food, textbooks, phone and toiletries.

I get that it's tempting and the govt doesn't really check on you, but come on, Leigh.

March 19, 2016

I hate to say this, but from https://www.humanservices.gov.au/customer/services/centrelink/austudy :

It seems fairly obvious that you are not declaring that you are living with a de facto partner who earns $60k(?) and supports you. I have nothing against students who accept a student allowance when they are struggling - those students typically have to pay rent, do not have a designer wardrobe, live in a flatshare with several other flatmates to save money, and cook or eat pizza/fish n chips/instant noodles most of the time. And they certainly don't get to hire people to wash their bathrooms. Nobody needs $1100 a month for just food, textbooks, phone and toiletries.

I get that it's tempting and the govt doesn't really check on you, but come on, Leigh.

I actually forgot that part they do count defacto partnerships over there and their incomes as well if you live together..

March 19, 2016

I feel bad for the OP's boyfriend, because it's clear that this date thing isn't the real issue here and it's only a matter of time before the OP finds something else to be not so happy with.

But I have hope that he will eventually tire of the rabbit hole that is trying to appease a materialistic person and find someone who genuinely loves him for him, even if he's *only* able to afford the girl's tuition and some nice dresses and makeup.

March 19, 2016

I feel bad for the OP's boyfriend, because it's clear that this date thing isn't the real issue here and it's only a matter of time before the OP finds something else to be not so happy with.

But I have hope that he will eventually tire of the rabbit hole that is trying to appease a materialistic person and find someone who genuinely loves him for him, even if he's *only* able to afford the girl's tuition and some nice dresses and makeup.

The Op never did answer me when I asked if she would be happy with going on a free date Aus is a lovely place with lots of gorgeous places and things to do that are very low cost or free..

March 19, 2016

I hate to say this, but from https://www.humanservices.gov.au/customer/services/centrelink/austudy :

It seems fairly obvious that you are not declaring that you are living with a de facto partner who earns $60k(?) and supports you. I have nothing against students who accept a student allowance when they are struggling - those students typically have to pay rent, do not have a designer wardrobe, live in a flatshare with several other flatmates to save money, and cook or eat pizza/fish n chips/instant noodles most of the time. And they certainly don't get to hire people to wash their bathrooms. Nobody needs $1100 a month for just food, textbooks, phone and toiletries.

I get that it's tempting and the govt doesn't really check on you, but come on, Leigh.

As an Australian resident paying a good chunk of taxes, it really really irks me that my money is going to finance such a wasteful lifestyle. I never signed anything authorising it to go to pay your so called "love language" bs.

March 19, 2016

Did I mention I lived over there?...its not just a American thing..but again if you say so im not going to argue with you over that..and what about retail jobs? there are other jobs available in the evenings not just bars and waitress work..if your happy accepting government assistance then great but thats your choice and is not the 100% norm 100% of the time im sorry..I knew a lot of students who worked their butts off to get thu school over there with out having to do that..

Well working full time through college here isn't the norm.

Has it ever occurred to you that most students don't have the aptitude to work full time and alsl study full time? I personally wouldn't pass.

Andu have to finish my degree within 4 years. So part time study isn't even an option for many students.

Most people see assistance during college as essential for many students in order for the students to actually achieve pass grades.

I have NEVER met an Australian who thinks full time students are lazy for opting to workpart time rather than fulltime?

Your attitude is totally bizarre.

99% of nornal people would see studying full time and working full time as hard working lol.

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