Mindy6803 Posted March 14, 2016 Posted March 14, 2016 My ex and I broke up 2 weeks ago. He dumped me because he's military and has to move in 5 months. I can't go and he said he doesn't want to be more attached. He got drunk and told me never to talk to him again. I haven't talked to him except to ask about my daughter belongings and what did he want me to do with his. 2 short convos. And one purse text where he got a smeared pic of a table by accident. After 5 days of not speaking he suddenly blocks me on Facebook. Deletes all the pics of us but then puts his profile pic of him in my house with his Christmas gift from on from me. Only thing I know that changed is I went to a bar with a guy friend but I didn't see anyone my ex or I knew there. The profile he blocked was my new one I created after we broke up which has no connections to him. But he didn't un tag or delete anything from my mom or friends.
ExpatInItaly Posted March 14, 2016 Posted March 14, 2016 He's doing what he needs to do to move on. You should be doing the same. He kind of sounds like a jerk, telling you to never talk to him again. 3
katiegrl Posted March 14, 2016 Posted March 14, 2016 Good God, the way he is behaving, one would think his life was being threatened or something, sheesh! What an over-reaction. I mean he's not even leaving for five months! I think there was more to than him leaving. I agree with Expat, he sounds like a jerk. Frankly, his behavior is cruel and IMO you dodged a bullet. Block him back, delete, next.
Emilia Posted March 14, 2016 Posted March 14, 2016 He isn't necessarily a jerk. A lot of military guys don't look for serious relationships because of the distance and deployments. He is trying to cut you out of his life - which is probably unfortunately a good idea. You would have to give up a LOT to commit to someone with his lifestyle, most likely isn't worth it. 1
ExpatInItaly Posted March 14, 2016 Posted March 14, 2016 He isn't necessarily a jerk. A lot of military guys don't look for serious relationships because of the distance and deployments. He is trying to cut you out of his life - which is probably unfortunately a good idea. You would have to give up a LOT to commit to someone with his lifestyle, most likely isn't worth it. The jerk part of my comment is not related to his line of work at all. It was the fact he told OP to never talk to him again. That to me sounds like a red flag in and of itself. OP, can you provide some context: when/why did he say that to you? 1
Emilia Posted March 14, 2016 Posted March 14, 2016 The jerk part of my comment is not related to his line of work at all. It was the fact he told OP to never talk to him again. That to me sounds like a red flag in and of itself. OP, can you provide some context: when/why did he say that to you? The two are related. Army guys aren't the soft cuddly types, they make a decision and stick with it. Perfectly rational from his point of view.
Tahirthegreat Posted March 14, 2016 Posted March 14, 2016 Just a way of moving on. I block all of my exes as well. Its easier that way. 1
Emilia Posted March 14, 2016 Posted March 14, 2016 Best to move on. It's hard to do long distance, clearly he isn't handling the whole thing very well. This is always an issue with military guys, they have to move at some point. Best to move on, nothing personal.
Author Mindy6803 Posted March 14, 2016 Author Posted March 14, 2016 Just a way of moving on. I block all of my exes as well. Its easier that way. Just seemed weird after 2 weeks to look up and block a profile that wasn't linked to him or our friends. Only thing different I've done is went to a bar with a male friend but I don't think anyone we knew was there.
Author Mindy6803 Posted March 14, 2016 Author Posted March 14, 2016 The jerk part of my comment is not related to his line of work at all. It was the fact he told OP to never talk to him again. That to me sounds like a red flag in and of itself. OP, can you provide some context: when/why did he say that to you? He broke up with me the day I told him I couldn't move with him. After a couple days we somewhat reconciled. He was distant to me that weekend. No hugging kissing etc unless I did it. But told me he still loved and I'd hurt him. We went to dinner with our families. He sent me a message after breaking up with me again because I'd supposedly ignored him all night. We went back and forth. He kept coming up with reasons why he thought I didn't love or want to be with him. When he said something ****ty to my mom I told him not to talk to her like that and he said never contact him again. Up until I told him I couldn't move we never really fought or disagreed. Only thing he got upset about was if he thought I didn't want to go with him.
NoLeafClover Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 Why were you at a bar with another man ..away from everyone's eyes that might know him?
Shineshelly Posted March 17, 2016 Posted March 17, 2016 Mindy, It sounds like a hurtful situation you’re in. It definitely doesn’t feel good to have a relationship end when you aren’t ready. I know it’s hard because you still have feelings for this guy, but if I were you I would really consider his behavior and wonder if it is a major sign that he is not right for you. As a military spouse, I am confident in telling you that your relationship will suffer greatly or end altogether if you are on shaky ground as he prepares to leave for service. Long-distance and the strain of potential danger is enough of a hardship without adding insecurity, trust issues and moral issues to the mix. Entering into a more serious relationship with a military member without strong communication skills can have serious consequences later on! Please consider focusing on other things that interest you and building a productive life for yourself. I don’t know where you stand with God or religion but I believe that if you put the outcome of your relationship in His hands, and trust the outcome, that you will have more fulfilling and meaningful relationships that can stand the test of time and strain. Good luck to you!
mcjordan Posted March 17, 2016 Posted March 17, 2016 The two are related. Army guys aren't the soft cuddly types, they make a decision and stick with it. Perfectly rational from his point of view. Boy I have not found this to be true at all.....
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