idontknowwhattodonow Posted March 14, 2016 Posted March 14, 2016 As my name says, I don't know what to do now. There is the amazing girl that I have been hanging out with for months and she is the only girl, well the only person, that I care so much about. She is everything that I wanted from one girl. Everything was going good, great actually, as we had a couple of dates, and spent a lot of time together, texted everyday, it was like that for the first time in my whole life, something was happening exactly as I wanted. And I felt for the first time that I have this bond, so strong bond with someone. But I don't know what or how, but something changed these days, or at least I have that feeling. When I text her she either texts with me as always, or in very rare cases, but that still happened, she just sees the message and does not respond. It is just totally weird, she stopped texting me first, and when we are together alone I got the feeling like before that everything is fine, but when we are in group with other friends, I get the feeling that I am like boring to her or don't know, I mean we talk and joke as before but in last few days we have seen each other twice, both times with friends around, and she acts like before, and then suddenly when I simply joke or something like that she acts a little as she is annoyed. Please, any kind of advice is welcome, I don't know what to do, she is the best thing that ever happened to me and now I feel like I am slowly losing her. I don't know should I just tell her how I feel or do this No Contact thing? 1
basil67 Posted March 14, 2016 Posted March 14, 2016 These texts that she's not responding to - are they important texts, or just keeping in touch for no actual reason texts? 2
Author idontknowwhattodonow Posted March 14, 2016 Author Posted March 14, 2016 These texts that she's not responding to - are they important texts, or just keeping in touch for no actual reason texts? Just sometimes when I try to keep in touch. 1
ExpatInItaly Posted March 14, 2016 Posted March 14, 2016 It can get old to keep up a text discussion that doesn't really have any meaningful content. Though you're well-intentioned, she might just not see the messages as overly important. Can you give an example of a message that's received no reply? Maybe there's something in way you're phrasing it that doesn't really invite a response. 1
Author idontknowwhattodonow Posted March 15, 2016 Author Posted March 15, 2016 (edited) It can get old to keep up a text discussion that doesn't really have any meaningful content. Though you're well-intentioned, she might just not see the messages as overly important. Can you give an example of a message that's received no reply? Maybe there's something in way you're phrasing it that doesn't really invite a response. Nothing special just asking about her day or about her studies, sometimes she replies, sometimes doesn't. And whats worrying me more is this confusing acting with our friends around. It's just she gives me this feeling that I can't tell if she likes me anymore. I don't know but sometimes I get a feeling that she is bored with me, or perhaps mad, but I don't know what could have I done to provoke that, everything was great. Edited March 15, 2016 by idontknowwhattodonow 1
fitnessfan365 Posted March 15, 2016 Posted March 15, 2016 The always wanting to see you with friends around means she's avoiding being alone with you. That's a bad sign. Unless you're not actually making plans for solo dates? My advice would be to back off and give her a bit of space. Let her initiate a text for a change. Then when you do hear from her, use that as an opportunity to plan a date for just you and her. 2
smackie9 Posted March 15, 2016 Posted March 15, 2016 It could be that you were under the impression they were "dates" but they were not to her. I'm guessing she has met someone else. My advise, don't spend months hanging out with a girl you like. Ask her out on real dates, after you have talked to her a few times. Girls like confidence, a man to take the lead. 1
introverted1 Posted March 15, 2016 Posted March 15, 2016 As my name says, I don't know what to do now. There is the amazing girl that I have been hanging out with for months and she is the only girl, well the only person, that I care so much about. She is everything that I wanted from one girl. Everything was going good, great actually, as we had a couple of dates, and spent a lot of time together, texted everyday, it was like that for the first time in my whole life, something was happening exactly as I wanted. And I felt for the first time that I have this bond, so strong bond with someone. But I don't know what or how, but something changed these days, or at least I have that feeling. When I text her she either texts with me as always, or in very rare cases, but that still happened, she just sees the message and does not respond. It is just totally weird, she stopped texting me first, and when we are together alone I got the feeling like before that everything is fine, but when we are in group with other friends, I get the feeling that I am like boring to her or don't know, I mean we talk and joke as before but in last few days we have seen each other twice, both times with friends around, and she acts like before, and then suddenly when I simply joke or something like that she acts a little as she is annoyed. Please, any kind of advice is welcome, I don't know what to do, she is the best thing that ever happened to me and now I feel like I am slowly losing her. I don't know should I just tell her how I feel or do this No Contact thing? What does "hanging out with" mean exactly? Are you in high school? 1
Author idontknowwhattodonow Posted March 15, 2016 Author Posted March 15, 2016 What does "hanging out with" mean exactly? Are you in high school? It means that we used to spend a lot of time together, going on movies or drink, stuff like that. My English is not best so I didn't know how to express with better term. No I am not.
Tahirthegreat Posted March 15, 2016 Posted March 15, 2016 She probably just not that interested. Dont let it bother you, ignore her and find someone else who wants to respond to your texts.
ff12343 Posted March 15, 2016 Posted March 15, 2016 You need to go NC and see how long it takes for her to respond. Don't get upset if days go by. It's the only way to tell. That's step 1 for now. Become ''busy''.
NinjaX Posted March 15, 2016 Posted March 15, 2016 Overtexting is counterproductive. You need to give her space to miss your presence. If you continue to keep in touch, she will never feel that. She will feel that she is losing her freedom. Instead of responding to you because she wants to, it begins to feel like an obligation. The worse part is that now she is pulling away, you are feeling more insecure about yourself. This insecurity will unconsciously show up in the way to communicate with her. Her attraction will slowly decrease as a result. Your best move is to do nothing. Wait for her to reach out to you and when she does, be happy and set a date. 1
ff12343 Posted March 16, 2016 Posted March 16, 2016 Overtexting is counterproductive. You need to give her space to miss your presence. If you continue to keep in touch, she will never feel that. She will feel that she is losing her freedom. Instead of responding to you because she wants to, it begins to feel like an obligation. The worse part is that now she is pulling away, you are feeling more insecure about yourself. This insecurity will unconsciously show up in the way to communicate with her. Her attraction will slowly decrease as a result. Your best move is to do nothing. Wait for her to reach out to you and when she does, be happy and set a date. Amen to this. Listen to this man.
Author idontknowwhattodonow Posted March 16, 2016 Author Posted March 16, 2016 Overtexting is counterproductive. You need to give her space to miss your presence. If you continue to keep in touch, she will never feel that. She will feel that she is losing her freedom. Instead of responding to you because she wants to, it begins to feel like an obligation. The worse part is that now she is pulling away, you are feeling more insecure about yourself. This insecurity will unconsciously show up in the way to communicate with her. Her attraction will slowly decrease as a result. Your best move is to do nothing. Wait for her to reach out to you and when she does, be happy and set a date. I think you are right. That is exactly what is happening, but I don't know how to control that, every time she goes in distant mode I am more frightened to talk to her, thinking Ill **** it up even more...
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